Cohabiting Before Marriage

by Floyd Chappelear Sentry Magazine, June 2001 It has long been observed that marriages that are preceded by “living together” have a markedly higher divorce rate than those that are characterized by abstinence before marriage. One of the reasons that I have advanced is due to the fact that the two are not really one…

Read More

Why Is Sex Outside of Marriage Wrong?

by Perry Hall “I’ve been told sex outside of marriage is wrong. Why?” That is a question I got asked recently. “God said so” is one answer, but not as meaningful as others. Why did God say so? Is there a “why” behind the “what”? Surprisingly, two answers are different for believers than for unbelievers.…

Read More

Despite my repeated baptisms, I’m still committing fornication

Question: I went through a rough childhood. I was molested and all that. I was baptized one Sunday in a church when I was 11 because the pastor said that’s the only way I could take part. But afterward, she said my sibling and I are holding the church back, so we stop going to…

Read More

Would you marry a couple who are committing fornication?

Question: My question is: If you end up counseling someone you are considering to perform their wedding and you find out they are currently living together, what do you do? I know you will discuss that with them from the Bible no doubt. But what do you do if they do not get that right…

Read More

How do I straighten myself out?

Question: Hi, I came across this website and saw how some issues about relationships have been addressed. I was actually having a headache presently about a matter, and that’s why I looking online. I hoped there would be someone I can share it with, and get the right advice. I came across my girlfriend (who…

Read More

How can we be forgiven of our fornication?

Question: Hello minister Hamilton, I reached out to you a few years back when I had questions and I wanted to get baptized into Christ and follow God. Well, these past two years I have been living with my girlfriend and we just found out we are expecting a child in May. We are both…

Read More

Is cheating while dating known as adultery?

Question: Is cheating while dating (as in having a boyfriend or girlfriend) known as adultery? Answer: Having sex with someone you are not married to is called “fornication.” See Notes on Sex for more information. Adultery is a type of fornication where one or both people are married, but not to each other. Dating carries no formal…

Read More

Is a wedding necessary since people don’t always keep their promise?

Question: Hello. I’m new to this website and I have an important question regarding premarital sex. My best friend and I love each other to the point where we like to show affection toward each other. We are 100% sure that we will stay together forever. I’m his first partner and so is he. However,…

Read More

Excellent article on why premarital sex is wrong

Question: Re: Why Sex Outside of Marriage Is Wrong Excellent, excellent, excellent article! I was feeling a little doubtful, (doubting Thomas mode), about why God had said, “No,” to premarital sex. I’d like to thank you for such a dead-on and solidly-backed explanation as to why it is wrong. Not only were you throwing out references…

Read More

I stopped attending church because I committed sexual sins

Question: Please, I am a baptized Christian who is a member of a denomination. I am in need of your advice. I am 26 years of age. I have engaged in sinful sex with a cousin on several occasions, for which I felt ashamed after the acts. I stopped going for the Lord’s Supper and…

Read More

What do I do about a leading member living with a woman?

Question: What should an individual member do when faced with a leading member, teacher, and song leader is living together with a woman of the church. It seems that the entire church is trying to ignore it. I talked to the preacher and he gave a lengthy explanation, saying the member is impotent and that…

Read More

I can’t marry my girlfriend because we are from the same clan

Question: Hi, I am from Uganda. I have lived with my girlfriend for 8 years, but it was only a few months back that I realized we belong to the same clan. I love my girlfriend because she has been there for me, but the problem is, I need a holy marriage. This last summer…

Read More

Am I not allowed to get married because I committed fornication?

Question: Sorry about this being a tough one. As a believer, I am in a really tough spot. I firmly believe the Bible teaches that sex is a biblical marriage. Although this is not what the church or mainstream media teaches. In Scripture, any time virgins had sex it was understood to be marriage. “He…

Read More

Do I tell my boyfriend that I cheated on him?

Question: Hi, I love your articles and I am facing a problem now. Just some background about me. I am a Christian who has backslid for almost 10 years. I have a 4 years long boyfriend with me. But just last year, me being dumb and naive, a guy friend told me that I would…

Read More

Why is the guy I committed fornication with marrying someone else?

Question: Dear Beloved, Several years ago, a Christian guy from my church approached me about his interest and desire to become my life partner. Initially, I refused due to certain situations and explained the consequences we both would be facing. I was firm in my refusal, but he repeatedly requested while affirming to face any…

Read More

How do I clean up my life before Jesus returns?

Question: Hello. I was hoping to receive some help and answers. With the shape the world is in, I can’t help but foresee Jesus coming soon. Frankly, I just read Matthew 24:1-31 and can’t help but feel fear. I struggle with a lot of things that I can’t seem to break. How do I turn…

Read More

How do I keep my family from dividing over my choice of a girlfriend?

Question: Good evening sir, I need advice. I’m dating my brother’s ex-girlfriend. They dated for almost five years. It ended when my brother got another girl pregnant and he eventually ended up marrying the other girl. Five years after the breakup, I developed feelings for her, and when I told her, she told me that…

Read More

I need advice about living with my girlfriend

Question: Good day sir, I read through the advice you gave a lady on your site and I was enlightened with your answers. Please sir, I also need your help in this area. I am a guy staying with my girlfriend. The problem is that we have set rules to guide us for the period…

Read More

Should I tell my boyfriend that I’ve had sex with my cousin?

Question: Hello, I need help. I am a young lady. I have a good obedient boyfriend. He is loyal, faithful, and respects me. We have dated for five years now. He has not asked me for sex, for which I am proud of him. The problem now is that my cousin lives with me at…

Read More

Was fornication not a sin under the Old Testament?

Question: Since the Old Testament had no shedding of blood for fornication, could it be considered a sin under the Old Testament? Answer: There were numerous types of offerings given to God depending on the circumstances. A sin-offering was given when the person’s sin did not have restitution included in the punishment. “Now if a…

Read More

My daughter, whom I had from an affair, ignores me

Question: In my younger days, I met this woman and got her pregnant after a prolonged friendship. We were not ready for marriage and we went our separate ways. Later, both of us married to other people. I followed up on our daughter and even got her a job where she met her future husband.…

Read More

How do we handle our son’s birth father’s recent contact?

Question: Good afternoon Brother Hamilton, First of all, I want to thank you for your wonderful service in maintaining such a great resource for us to learn from. Your website has truly helped and aided me in my Christian walk. I am a sister in Christ. Let me give you some background. My husband and…

Read More

I feel like I’m a fake Christian

Question: Good afternoon, I’m in my thirties. I have never been intimate with a man. Last month, for the first time I actually had a hard time setting boundaries and was fingered by the man I’m seeing. I’m so upset at myself because I’ve been so steadfast my entire life to do no more than…

Read More

I lied to my pastor about sleeping with her daughter

Question: Please, sir, there is something I want to discuss with you. I lied to my pastor and since that time I have been thinking about it. I am in a relationship with her daughter. We are planning to marry. I slept with the lady and the church members found out that I am going…

Read More

Did I make the right choice in returning to my old boyfriend?

Question: Good day! I have a long time boyfriend. I’m a Christian, and he is not. That he is not a Christian is a big deal for me. Even though he has been my boyfriend for almost five years, I keep praying to God to give me a godly man. A man who is actively…

Read More

Do we break up after committing fornication?

Question: Dear sir, I want to say a very big Thank You, for creating this platform to express our minds. I have a little problem, and I need your advice, sir. I am from a Christian home. I know the importance of Christian doctrine, and I tried as much as possible to live by this…

Read More

Can I marry my brother’s ex-girlfriend?

Question: Dear sir, I must commend you for the wonderful work you are doing in assisting people with important answers using the Bible. I have a girlfriend whom I love so much and I plan to marry. The problem I have is that she and my younger brother once dated and had oral sex before…

Read More

I can’t accept God’s forgiveness

Question: Can God forgive me for my past sins of fornication? Can I meet a godly man to marry regardless of my past sins? Answer: Why do you think your own personal sins are so special or severe that the Almighty God is unable to forgive you? God is able to forgive all sins that…

Read More

What do we do? Our wedding was delayed

Question: I have a question about getting married. My fiancé and I have been engaged for two years now. We have finally gone down to the courthouse, have filled out an application, and have obtained our marriage license. We had an appointment with the Justice of the Peace today. I have sinned with her and…

Read More

Teaching Love

https://www.lavistachurchofchrist.org/cms/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/Teaching-Love.mp3 by Jeffrey W. Hamilton Text: Romans 13:11-14   I.         I received a complaint several years ago. After reading an article on why sex outside of marriage is sin, the reader complained, “I wish you guys would pay more attention to the golden rule, ‘love thy neighbor,’ than all the homophobic and ‘sex is sin’ stuff.”…

Read More

Do we need to redo our confession before the church?

Question: Dear Preacher, I must thank you for the wonderful work you are doing to help the churches of Christ. I have an issue that I would like you to help me with. I fornicated with a lady in church, and she is pregnant. We spoke to church elders about our intentions to marry because…

Read More

Can I continue dating the girl I’ve been sinning with?

Question: Please people of God I really need your prayers, I am a youth of 26 years. I am a Christian. I am in deep sorrow, and I feel like this is the end for me. I feel like God can never forgive me for what I have been doing. I have been fornicating, masturbating,…

Read More

Will I make God angry by my sins before marriage?

Question: There was a lady I was dating before I was born again. Both of our parents knew we were dating and they really supported it. Along the way, I was saved. Soon I took her to the church where I was attending and she was born again too. After we both were born again…

Read More

Was I married without my consent?

Question: I will like to first thank you for the work you do. I have a problem that is bothering me, and I would like to seek answers. I met a lady while in my second year at university. We dated for a while, but we had many challenges as we disagree on a lot…

Read More

Does God allow common-law marriages?

Question: Hello, I am a newborn Christian, baptized into Christ two years ago. I would like to ask: because fornication is a big deal for God, at what point is it considered marriage in the Bible? Forgive me please if I’m wrong, but it seems the Bible does not talk about standing before the preacher…

Read More