I am a girl in my thirties who had held on to my beliefs and Christian values. I had a boyfriend who was so into sex. But I told him to relax so we can know each other very well. But to my surprise we had sex, and I don't know how to move on. I feel too guilty about it. I can't look into my mother's eyes as she is a pastor. I can't go to church. I feel God will punish me for that.
Please, I need help. Should I continue with this relationship or end it? Can God ever forgive me for this wrong doing?
It seems hardly surprising at all. You chose to date a man who made it clear that he wanted to have sex. Clearly, he has had sex with other women in the past, but you deceived yourself into thinking you would be different. That he accomplished his objective is not surprising at all.
I must assume that he doesn't hold Christian values and sees nothing wrong with what he has talked you into doing. If that is the case, then you can expect him to continue to press you to have sex, after all, you did it before so in his mind doing it again doesn't change anything. Therefore, continuing to date this man is a statement that you are willing to repeat your sin.
Why you think your particular sin is unforgivable is something that doesn't make sense. God has stated repeatedly that He is willing to forgive anyone who changes their behavior and returns to Him with their whole heart (Ezekiel 18:21-23; II Peter 3:9).
However, returning to a church that is not following the Bible isn't going to help matters. The fact that your mother preaches, in violation of I Corinthians 14:34-35 and I Timothy 2:11-12, tells me that you had been attending a church that doesn't put God's laws first. I would encourage you to find a church that actually upholds God's standards.
Thank you for your kind advice.