I love her, but she remains with her boyfriend


Good day,

I joined a church for close to a year now.

There's this particular lady in the church I like and wished to get closer to her to know if she's free and available for marriage. Eventually, we got talking and it was as if she also had been waiting for me. She told me she has a boyfriend but still, she loves me.

We got talking deeper, and I eventually visited her. It was during my second visit that we had sex. The pastor and his wife trust me so much and would be so disappointed to hear this about me.

The lady is also not responding well to the questions I have been posing to her. I am feeling used and guilty because her responses to are showing me that she still wants to be with her boyfriend.

I admit I have committed fornication, but I love her more even after our sinful act. What should I do, please?


"With her many persuasions she entices him; with her flattering lips she seduces him. Suddenly he follows her as an ox goes to the slaughter, or as one in fetters to the discipline of a fool, until an arrow pierces through his liver; as a bird hastens to the snare, so he does not know that it will cost him his life" (Proverbs 7:21-23).

You tell me that you've fallen in love with a woman who is living with another man. She is good at sweet-talking and by your second date had your clothes off and in her bed. And yet, you imagine yourself to be in love with her.

I said "imagine" because you failed to list one quality that would make her a good wife. She isn't righteous, since it is clear that she sleeps around. How is that a quality that you want in a wife?

I don't know what your past is like. You admit you've sinned, but I don't see an indication that you are changing. You are concerned that others will find out that you've sinned, but you continue to pursue the woman who led you into sin.

"But these, like unreasoning animals, born as creatures of instinct to be captured and killed, reviling where they have no knowledge, will in the destruction of those creatures also be destroyed, suffering wrong as the wages of doing wrong. They count it a pleasure to revel in the daytime. They are stains and blemishes, reveling in their deceptions, as they carouse with you, having eyes full of adultery that never cease from sin, enticing unstable souls, having a heart trained in greed, accursed children; forsaking the right way, they have gone astray, having followed the way of Balaam, the son of Beor, who loved the wages of unrighteousness" (I Peter 2:12-15).

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