Childhood
Is it normal for an eight-year-old boy to be touching himself?
Question: We have custody of an 8-year-old boy. During the first six years of his life, he was exposed to drugs, sex, filthy language, compulsive lying, and a lot of antisocial behavior from his mother and other adults in his life. He frequently puts his hands down his pants out in the open, and I…
Read MoreI caught my 8-year-old son looking at homosexual porn
Question: Recently I discovered my 8-year-old son had been looking up gay porn. He was very honest when I confronted him. He told me he started looking at these images two years ago. I am devastated that I did not protect him from porn in general but the male search made it ten times harder…
Read MoreSetting Boundaries
by Jeffrey W. Hamilton Text: Ephesians 6:1-4 I. We live in a country that is founded on the ideas of freedom and liberty A. Yet we don’t live in society without any restraints. We have laws, rules, regulations, expectations B. It is the very laws that we have which gives us our freedom 1. How? One of my…
Read MoreWhat is the difference between make-believe magic and occultism?
Question: Hi minister, As a parent, how should I handle children’s entertainment? My child loves movies that have princesses as she now says she is a princess (she loves dresses ). But a lot of children’s content has a form of magic in them. What is the difference between make-believe magic and occultism magic? Is…
Read MoreWhat should I tell my son who has a fear of death?
Question: What should I tell my son who has a fear of death like me? He is only six but seems to be afraid of the concept of death. Answer: In order for you to help him, you will first have to conquer your own fears. “How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me…
Read MoreShould I let my children watch Ghostbusters?
Question: Jeff, I have kind of maybe a silly question here, but here it goes. One of my kids (a 7-year-old boy) has an interest in the Ghostbusters. I use to watch those movies on TV in the past when I was a kid. They were heavily edited back then, and I didn’t realize some…
Read MoreChildren Are Special
by Doy Moyer According to Jesus, children are special and need to be protected. In Mark 9:36-37, we read this: And he took a child and put him in the midst of them, and taking him in his arms, he said to them, “Whoever receives one such child in my name receives me, and whoever…
Read MoreMy four-year-old hates God
Question: Good morning. I have a few questions I am needing guidance on. My mother passed away a year ago. Then close to her one year, my grandmother passed away. I have a 4-year-old son who is struggling hard. We are a church family but now he does not want to go to church ever…
Read MoreI don’t understand, our granddaughter is absolutely defiant of authority, even as a small child
Question: Hello, Thank you for the time you take to answer so many questions. My story is long and my questions are many being new to the church of Christ, so I will ask for insight into just one specific situation that is leaving my husband and me not really having accurate knowledge in this…
Read MoreChildren and the Bible
by Doy Moyer Somewhere along the line, it seems to me, there has been an assumption that all the stories in the Bible have to be something for children. If some account is disturbing, then there is a problem with the Bible — as if the Bible was written just for the sake of kids.…
Read MoreHow do I get a child to stop swearing?
Question: Hello Jeffrey, I was wondering if you could give me a few strategies for deterring swearing in my eight-year-old. It has already happened twice in the last few days, and I’ve explained to him why it’s not appropriate to say those things. So I am hoping that did the trick, but just in case,…
Read MoreMy seven-year-old, who is tall and skinny, thinks she is too fat. What do I do?
Question: Thank you for such a helpful website! I’ve read the article on Five to Nine-Year-Olds this morning. I’m concerned about my seven-year-old girl who attends public school. She’s naturally a tall, thin girl but she asked me if I think she’s fat and lately has been obsessed about this — showing me her stomach and asking…
Read MoreI feel bad because I told the principal that a boy hit my boy and they expelled that boy
Question: Hi, I feel so bad about myself because my boy’s friend hit my boy. I spoke with the principal and I told him that not every school has the program that he needs. My son’s friend has problems but the school doesn’t help. I felt like I did bad, saying what I said. I…
Read MoreOver Diagnosis of ADHD Indicated
Source: “An ‘astronomical’ rise in ADHD diagnosis, The New York Times, published in Omaha World-Herald, 02 April 2013. I don’t know why this is so surprising. Common sense has indicated for decades that children were being drugged for no other reason than to keep classrooms calm and to allow parents to control their children with little effort.…
Read MoreParenting Grade-School Children — Responsibility Training
https://www.lavistachurchofchrist.org/cms/wp-content/uploads/2013/02/ParentingGradeSchoolChildrenResponsibilityTraining.mp3 by Jeffrey W Hamilton Text: Lamentations 3:25-36 I. How quickly our children grow A. The years between five and nine seem to quickly fly by B. The children enter school. C. Relationships with people outside family develops 1. Teachers 2. Friends – usually strongly attached to same sex D. Sibling rivalry common especially with those of the opposite sex E. Growth…
Read MoreParenting Pre-School Children – Obedience Training
https://www.lavistachurchofchrist.org/cms/wp-content/uploads/2013/01/ParentingPreschoolersObedienceTraining.mp3 by Jeffrey W. Hamilton Text: Ephesians 6:1-4 I. Simply because limits are placed, it doesn’t mean that they are always followed A. Children of this age have a fair ability to communicate B. A source of endless “Why?” 1. It is no longer enough to know something exists, they want a reason. 2. Not so much as to…
Read MoreParenting Two and Three-Year-Olds: Limits Tested
https://www.lavistachurchofchrist.org/cms/wp-content/uploads/2012/12/ParentingTwoAndThreeYearOldsLimits.mp3 by Jeffrey W. Hamilton Text: Hebrews 12:3-14 I. What parent hasn’t been warned about the terrible twos and threes A. The cause of trouble 1. No longer completely dependent on parents 2. Children can efficiently move about — run, climb, manipulate objects — but they haven’t learned safety. 3. They can now express their desires, but they haven’t…
Read MoreHow do I get my daughter to obey the first time?
Question: I am having an issue with my eight-year-old. I can ask, or tell, her to clean her room, do her homework, take a shower, or anything for that matter and it takes me being right on top of her and hounding her to do it, and when it does finally get done (if it…
Read MoreHow do you explain “countenance” to small children?
Question: Pardon my ignorance. How do I explain what “countenance” is to my 5 and 7-year-olds? We are studying Genesis and came to Genesis 4:5 and my 7-year-old asked what is “countenance?” What does that mean? How do I explain? Honestly, I don’t know myself. Answer: “Countenance” is the expression on a person’s face: happy,…
Read MoreHow do I keep from giving in to my five-year-old?
Question: I have a five-year-old, soon to be six. Her whole life I have pretty much gave in to her, and I see that this has only hurt our relationship. She is a very good kid but all too often throws a fit to get her way. My biggest problem is I show my anger.…
Read MoreHow can you teach parents about spanking when my own parents abused me as a child?
Question: I recently came across this article on your website, about spanking young children as a form of punishment: Two and Three-Year-Olds: Raising Godly Children in a Wicked World. I was absolutely appalled by it. Thanks to articles like yours, many children in “God-fearing” homes are severely physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually abused when their parents…
Read MoreIs it normal for a young child to connect their private parts to the idea of sex?
Question: Can you please tell me if children normally connect their private parts to the idea of sex or the reproductive parts of the opposite sex? I’m asking because I did so since around 7. Is it normal? Answer: A child, prior to puberty, has no built-in concept of what is sex. He will not…
Read MoreI spanked my daughter for throwing things at me, but it just got worse. It just doesn’t seem like it is working
Question: I am at a loss with my four-year-old daughter. Spanking isn’t working. My husband and I agreed that we would spank only for lying and defiance and set ground rules and expectations with my daughter long ago for that. Here is the problem, spanking tends to make the problem worse. Example: she was told…
Read MoreOne of my boys is starting to wet his pants when I give him a spanking. What should I do?
Question: I have a problem with one of my boys. A few times he has had a wet spot when being spanked. At first, I was shocked and thought I was overdoing the spanking and from the pain of the spanking that he had lost control, but it was not any harder or lighter than…
Read MoreExpect More Out of Your Kids
by Matthew Allen Earlier this week, I participated in a discussion concerning alcohol and advertising. The debate was over whether alcohol companies target youth in their advertising. There is very strong evidence to suggest that the alcohol companies do in fact target adolescent audiences even though such persons are under the legal age to consume alcohol.…
Read MoreHow do you prevent sibling rivalry?
Question: I was reading some thoughts shared recently by those who are finishing up their years of homeschooling their children. One thing that struck me, in particular, was one mother’s mention of how she enjoyed her children’s teenage years. That is really something! My five daughters currently range in age from 1 year to almost…
Read MoreDoes Spanking Cause Lower IQ in Children?
by Sam Stinson “He who withholds his rod hates his son, But he who loves him disciplines him diligently” (Proverbs 13:24). I like to think that most scientific studies are not politically motivated. However, when I read about studies like the following, I’m forced to rethink this belief. A study recently presented by the International…
Read MoreFamily Time Together Is Essential
by W. Frank Walton in Biblical Insights, Vol. 5, No. 8, August 2005 Time together is the bonding mortar that binds family members together before God in love Giving Thanks Psalm 107 “Hear, my son, and accept My sayings and the years of your life will be many. I have directed you in the way of…
Read MoreMy eight-year-old is having erections and he says they hurt
Question: My son just turned 8 and is having erections. He tells me it hurts and burns. I told him to put a cold wet cloth on it so it will go down. My husband tells me it is normal, but he seems so young and it seems to hurt. Is this normal and any…
Read MoreCan a boy have erections at any age?
Question: Can a boy get an erection at any age? Can they get an erection from the time they are born, even though there is no sperm production? Answer: Boys experience erections even before they are born. They start as early as 16 weeks into pregnancy. These erections are not like those experienced by adult…
Read MoreShould we tell our children not to mention to other people that they get spanked?
Question: I have greatly enjoyed all the information and insights that you share on this page. My husband and I are raising three sons. We use spanking as one of our disciplinary tools with the boys, especially for the 3 Ds – deliberate disobedience, disrespect, and dishonesty. Recently one of my sons was in some…
Read MoreThings are improving in our home, but it is going so slowly!
Question: Thank you! Our home is slowly changing from a battle zone to a loving home. We still struggle, basically, since our 9-year-old acts like a 3 to 5-year-old, then I think she should have 3 to 5-year-old freedoms and choices. These will be earned back as she learns self-control and respect. I’m really needing…
Read MoreShould spankings only be done on the bottom?
Question: We have three boys 8,10 and 12. Of late they have become very defiant. We have read your web site and decided to spank. While being spanked they kick their legs and refuse to stay still. Should we swat them on the back of the legs to stop this, or is the bottom the…
Read MoreThat You May Teach Your Children
by Dene Ward Someone recently asked me what I thought a kindergarten-aged child should know about the Bible. All I can tell you is from my own experience. I believe they should know about God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit—and that all of those beings love him no matter what. They should know every major…
Read MoreHow do you handle a child with ADD or ADHD?
Question: A Christian friend has a child that has been diagnosed with ADD or ADHD. I keep this child once a week and I have several questions for those of you who are familiar with ADD or ADHD. The mother doesn’t want to give me much information because she feels I already have prejudiced views…
Read MoreI can’t get my daughter to drink enough liquids
Question: I am having trouble with my daughter not drinking enough fluids. She gets really constipated and we all suffer for it. She may be in physical pain, but it messes with our bath and bedtimes. She was on the toilet for 45 minutes last night. She also makes us late for church, school, etc.…
Read MoreMy child is constantly angry
Question: My 6 (almost 7) year old daughter is constantly angry. Anytime we tell her, “no,” or she doesn’t get her way, she gets this “angry face” and stomps around and pouts, or runs to her room to have a fit. I don’t give in to her when she behaves this way, so I figured…
Read MoreHow do you handle an overactive child without drugs?
Question: I am a tired mother with a very overactive 6-year-old, and though I do not want to rely on drugs to calm him, I’m forced to consider it, if this is indeed a problem that might be out of his hands and ours. It is a situation which I must deal with personally, and…
Read MoreMy child has become fearful of our new house
Question: I love your web site! Please advise: I have a 5-year-old son who has two older sisters. They have all been watching the Disney Channel’s Halloween specials. I just found out how scary they are, at least to a 5-year-old! To top things off, we just moved from 800 sq ft to a 3,000…
Read MoreWhat do you do with a whining 5-year-old who doesn’t like to take a bath?
Question: What do you do with a whining 5-year-old who doesn’t like to take a bath? Answer: Children learn to do things that let them do the things they want to do. The simple answer is that you’re the parent and he is the child. Don’t let the whining change or delay what needs to…
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