I don’t think I’m ready to get married

Question: Good afternoon, sir, I have a question. Please help me. I have a girlfriend I dated for three years, and she wants me to marry her. Honestly, I love her, but I have not yet reached the decision to marry her. Somehow, I feel like I am being pushed by her into marriage because…

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Should I marry this woman?

Question: Hi, I’m a male in my late twenties. I’ve been dating my girlfriend, who is a few years older, for several years. It’s been rocky because we didn’t have God as the center of our relationship until the last few months. To make a super long story a lot shorter, there have been many…

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Does God honor all marriages?

Question: Good morning, I would like to know if God honors all marriages. I was recently in a study and they brought up Hebrews 13:4. I was told this verse God applies to Christians who are in the church. God does not honor marriages outside of Christ. For example, if I am a Baptist and…

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Should a couple marry because they will be having a child?

Question: Hello, What do you think about a couple who have been dating for five months, argue often for various reasons, and she gets pregnant? The guy is not sure she could be a good wife because he doesn’t like things about her. Do you think they should get married just because they’re having a…

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Does the number of sexual partners make a difference?

Question: Hello, I was wondering about body count, as in multiple sexual partners. There have been recent talks about it, so I might as well ask since it has bothered me a bit. There have been videos and posts of people being proud of their body count, but there have also been several posts and…

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Am I bound by a childhood promise?

Question: Hi, Mr. Hamilton. When Jesus says, “Let your yes be yes and your no be no” in Matthew 5:37, he means that Christians ought to be people who keep their word, whether they formally call it a vow or swear an oath. If Jill tells Jack, “Yes, I will marry you,” she has made…

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How do I help my unemployed husband?

Question: Hello, I’m writing because I don’t know what to do. My husband is showing job instabilities. This all started when he left his very good and secure job because he had some colleagues who tried to tempt him to gaze at other women. He left because he wanted to be loyal to me and…

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God’s Relationship with His People

by Zeke Flores Marriage and its accouterments are often used in Scripture to describe God’s relationship with His people. “I will rejoice greatly in the LORD, My soul will exult in my God; For He has clothed me with garments of salvation, He has wrapped me with a robe of righteousness, As a bridegroom decks…

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Must married couples have children?

Question: Hello Mr. Hamilton! I hope this finds you well! I have a question and wanted to hear your thoughts on it. I don’t know of any verse that says Christians, if married, should have children. However, in I Timothy 5:14, Paul says he wants widows to bear children. Does that mean they have to?…

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Do I have to marry the man I committed fornication with?

Question: Hi. I am a born-again Christian woman. I have committed fornication with a younger man who is still in college and who is also a Christian. I have realized that it is wrong and repented since then, and I have not had any further sexual relationships with him. I have also avoided communicating with…

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Why are the laws for remarriage different between the Old Law and New Law?

Question: If the marriage law is universal, why is the remarriage law in Deuteronomy 24 different from Romans 7:2 in that the guilty party who gets married to a second spouse can go back to his/her first husband? Answer: The two laws of God are different. “Behold, days are coming,” declares the LORD, “when I…

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Hosea: A Leader Who Made an Astounding Sacrifice!

by Max Dawson One of the things I have learned about leadership is that sometimes, the best leaders are those who were reluctant to be leaders. Witness the case of Moses (Exodus 3:7-4:17). I have known men who were reluctant to serve as an overseer of the church, as a deacon, or even as a…

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Marital Needs

by Perry Hall In premarital counseling, I always ask what the number one need of a man fulfilled in marriage is, and what the number one need of a woman fulfilled in marriage is. Even when these couples are not religious, their own self-awareness teaches them the correct answer. When they say they don’t know,…

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Do marriages really end at death?

Question: Marriage vows say, “Until death, do we part,” is this the truth? If so, I am so sad about this. I need to understand. Though, I cannot find a definite answer. I know there are things that we are not to know. Also, I understand that I am human. I am searching for a…

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Kindness and Generosity

https://www.lavistachurchofchrist.org/cms/wp-content/uploads/2014/11/Kindness-and-Generosity.mp3 by Jeffrey W. Hamilton Text: Isaiah 58:1-12   I.         I ran across an interesting article by Aemily Smith, originally published in The Atlantic, November 9, 2014. “Science Says Lasting Relationships Come Down to Two Basic Traits.”             A.        It was about what factors showed whether a relationship would survive or not.             B.        The basic factors were kindness and…

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We can’t afford to get married

Question: I feel awful because I was reading a post from 2010 titled, “Should we marry now or when we are in a better financial situation? I feel the same way. The thing is, we are both 20. My boyfriend doesn’t have much money, and we have been together for over two years. What’s worse…

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My husband hasn’t been the nicest to me lately

Question: Hello there, I just want to start off by saying I enjoy your website. Thank you for providing that for us. I am a Christian (member of the Church of Christ). My husband however is not. He started off as one and, well, just went back to his worldly ways. He is a good…

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Not Enslaved

by Matthew W. Bassford From time to time, I receive article requests from brethren who want me to address a particular topic. Sadly, my usual response to these requests is to forget that they have been made and never write about them. However, recently someone asked me about my views of “not enslaved” in 1…

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What if my husband becomes a non-believer?

Question: Hello Brother Jeffrey, I hope all has been well. The situation I face now is this: My husband and I are currently separated for several reasons (him mostly not wanting the marriage at the time). My husband was a baptized Christian in the church when we married. He was raised in the church. We got…

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Would God override someone’s free will to marry me?

Question: Hi, I have a question about me personally and the desire to marry. I’m a 33-year-old,  virgin, born-again Christian. I had, years ago when I was in college, a moment with God. I asked God if this one girl I could date and I knew God spoke to me and said, “You have free…

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Is it a sin to marry an unbeliever?

Question: Please, I’d like you, sir, to answer this question. It’s also a problem that’s come into our congregation and I would like you to please explain to me what the scripture says about this. Our preacher is teaching us that it is a sin to marry an unbeliever. He interrupts everyone claiming to believe…

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Does it matter who performs a wedding?

Question: Hello, My fiancé and I have planned a destination wedding. The wedding package we purchased has an officiant included. I mention this because the planner stated that they have their preferred vendors meaning we potentially cannot reach out to the local church and ask a minister to marry us. We are members of the…

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Should I marry my fiance, who is not a practicing Christian?

Question: Should I marry my fiancé? My fiancé and I have been dating for 7 years. I was 17 when I met him and living a worldly life (partying, drinking, smoking, cursing) I entered my relationship with my current fiancé because he answered this question: “Are you Christian?” and his answer was “yes.” He grew…

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Illogical Fixes to Problems

https://www.lavistachurchofchrist.org/cms/wp-content/uploads/2022/12/Illogical-Fixes-to-Problems.mp3 by Jeffrey W. Hamilton Text: I Samuel 8:1-8   I.         For over 400 years, God ruled over the land of Israel.             A.        When the people became wicked, God sent in an enemy nation to conquer a portion of the land.             B.        When the people turned backed to God, he raised up a judge to lead the people…

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Challenges for the Year

https://www.lavistachurchofchrist.org/cms/wp-content/uploads/2023/01/Challenges-for-the-Year.mp3 by Jeffrey W. Hamilton Text: Romans 1:28-32   I.         Toward the end of each year, people tend to review the year and record the trends that are evident             A.        I’ve been collecting several articles in the last few months dealing with moral trends             B.        We are not of the world, but we must live in it -…

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Does “Setting Boundaries” apply to marriages?

Question: Good morning, I read “Setting Boundaries” and noticed how it’s applied to children. What if, and I say this will all do respect as I can as a wife, but what if I have a husband who acts like this? Do these principles still apply to a husband? This has to be the most…

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Marriage Counseling

by Matthew W. Bassford I’m a simple man. I believe that the Bible is the inspired word of God and that it is sufficient to equip us for every good work. My favorite hymn is “Give Me the Bible”. Consequently, whenever I encounter a problem that afflicts the soul, I presume that the solution lies…

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Can you explain more about the need for parental consent before marriage?

Question: Greetings beloved in the Lord, I hope you’re waxing strong in the vineyard of our Lord and Master. In Africa, it is cultural to seek parental consent before marriage. But there are instances where this consent is denied for personal and immoral reasons. Can you avail me with materials that one can use to…

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Should I marry a man who is less educated than I am?

Question: Good evening, I need counsel. I am a 28-year-old African lady, a Christian with a degree in Nursing Science, and currently working as a Registered Nurse in my country. I have deliberately mentioned my African origin, education, and professional qualification because my concern is around this aspect. I was raised in a Christian home with…

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A Good Mate

A Good Mate – Part 1A Good Mate – Part 2A Good Mate – Part 3 by Jeffrey W. Hamilton Text: I Peter 3:1-7   I.         Introduction             A.        Many, if not most people, spend a fair chunk of their life trying to reach a decision regarding who they will marry             B.        Sadly, most leave this important choice to…

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Do we need her father’s blessing?

Question: I bring you greetings, Please, sir, I have a pressing question that demands an urgent answer. I proposed to a girl and she accepted after praying about it. We both belong to one group in our church and according to the ethics of the group, every member of the group must attend an interview…

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Is It a Sin for Married Couples to Split the Bills?

Question: Hello sir, I know you are busy laboring for the Lord so I don’t want to take up too much of your time. I just want to thank you for your years of labor for the Lord and your website which is such a blessing to me as I study God’s word. To get…

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I don’t think I am worthy of getting married

Question: Greetings to my brother in Christ, I am grateful for the many lessons available on your website and have found guidance in many of the points and critical illumination of God’s word. I have been a member of the body of Christ from a young age. The men in my extended family for generations…

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Where should I live?

Question: Hi, I found your question and answer page and have been reading sermons and many of the answers you have replied with. I am struggling with a problem that is weighing very heavy on my heart and mind. My husband and I currently are living in separate homes about 10 minutes apart. It has…

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Is a shotgun wedding or a wedding involving a lie valid?

Question: God bless brother. I have questions about marriage. If someone lies in order to get married does God acknowledges that marriage? A young man married a woman after three weeks of knowing each other. He has a severe ambivalent attachment disorder. She lied to him about her child from a previous relationship of being…

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I’m unsure if I’m married to my ex-boyfriend

Question: Good evening! I’ve been praying, reading the Word, and reading godly people’s commentary on this topic – but I am still confused. I’m unsure if I will ever receive a definitive answer, but I would really appreciate any Scriptural knowledge you could share. I basically am just unsure if I’m technically married to my…

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Love and Respect

https://www.lavistachurchofchrist.org/cms/wp-content/uploads/2022/02/Love-and-Respect.mp3 by Jeffrey W. Hamilton Text: Ephesians 5:25-33   I.         There are some topics that are joined such that you cannot have one without the other.             A.        Faith and obedience are two sides the same subject.                         1.         You can’t really have faith without obedience – James 2:14-18                         2.         And you can’t really have obedience without faith – Romans 4:2-5…

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