I need counsel. I am a 28-year-old African lady, a Christian with a degree in Nursing Science, and currently working as a Registered Nurse in my country. I have deliberately mentioned my African origin, education, and professional qualification because my concern is around this aspect. I was raised in a Christian home with strong moral standards. God's grace, coupled with good parenting, has helped me maintain good morals and Christian values.
I am currently in a relationship with a 28-year-old man. I met this man this year and after 6 months of courtship, we are considering marriage. I've discussed with one of my parents our decision, but there is hesitation in supporting the idea of marriage with this man. He is a Christian, with good character, working as a waiter in one of the prominent hotels. Unfortunately, he didn't grow up with as many privileges and he failed to go further with his education.
My parent is concerned that it might not be a good idea for a well-trained, educated, and working woman to be married to a man who earns less than she does. I am torn between believing that I will love and respect this man regardless of our differences and the facts my parent is presenting before me (that a marriage, where a woman is better off than her husband, doesn't last).
What should I do?
This is a question that you and he will have to answer because I don't know your heart or his heart. Your parent's concern does exist in the world in general, but there are many exceptions. The success of the marriage depends on the attitude of the husband and wife.
Therefore, look in your heart and decide whether you think your education and earnings make you superior to the man you are dating. If so, then you won't be submissive as a wife and the marriage won't work. Ask him if you earning more and being further along in schooling makes him feel inferior. If it does, jealousy and bitterness might later take root.
However, if both of you respect and honor each other as you are, then you have a good foundation for a good marriage. Just watch out for others trying to tell you differently.
I sincerely appreciate the feedback. The feedback will surely assist in making a good decision.