Would God override someone’s free will to marry me?
Question:
Hi,
I have a question about me personally and the desire to marry.
I'm a 33-year-old, virgin, born-again Christian. I had, years ago when I was in college, a moment with God. I asked God if this one girl I could date and I knew God spoke to me and said, "You have free will and can pick and choose. When you marry this girl, I will bless the marriage and it will be amazing. But, she is not who I created for you."
When I was 11, my father held a rifle to my head and basically told me he was going to kill me. I prayed to God and said, "I am ready to die God. But, if You have a life that's worth living I want to live. A life worth living even though girls are gross, I want to get married and be the husband my dad never was. I want to have kids and be the father I never had and lastly do all You want me to do God. I want You proud of me."
So, two things:
- When I hear God's voice, it's like a feeling of words coming from my abdomen. I can't explain it better.
- I know we prophesy in part, the Bible says.
So, I really want to get married and I've asked God where should I be to meet her and if am I a good enough man to marry one of His daughters. Anyway, I really want to meet her and know what she looks like, what her voice sounds like, and all about her.
I go to church -- actually three, lol. I'm a youth group leader at one, I have friends at another, and the third is a Pentecostal church I am most aligned with. I box, I take dance classes, I lift, and I also have a job. I put myself out there. But, there are no opportunities.
Now, I have a hard time believing God overrode someone's free will for me. So, I know I'm going about this totally wrong! Abraham sent his servant to find Isaac a wife and Jacob used his free will on Rachel and got conned into marrying Leah.
I have my life pretty well together. I just need wisdom or advice or a word of knowledge, please. Thank you!
Answer:
I approach the teachings in the Bible a bit differently than you do. I accept that God said that prophecies would end. "Love never fails; but if there are gifts of prophecy, they will be done away; if there are tongues, they will cease; if there is knowledge, it will be done away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part; but when the perfect comes, the partial will be done away" (I Corinthians 13:8-10). I found it interesting that you referred to this passage but skipped over the fact that it talks about the end of prophecies. You see, the perfect Word of God has come (James 1:25). The Bible is complete (II Timothy 3:16-17; II Peter 1:2-4). It was delivered at one period of time and not trickled out to us as the Old Testament was revealed (Jude 3). For more information, see:
While a few times God arranged for a marriage, such as answering the prayer of Abraham's servant to find a wife for Isaac, the vast majority of times you find people in the Bible choosing their own spouse. Even in the case of Rachel, she was given a choice (Genesis 24:57-58). God teaches us how to select a good husband or wife, but it is up to us to put those teachings into practice. See A Good Mate. Also, see:
- Do you think God created one special person for you?
- Does God have a say in whom we choose as a spouse?
God doesn't override your free will to answer the prayer of a woman and He doesn't override a woman's free will to answer your prayers. He may get suitable people together, but it is up to the two people involved to decide if they want to marry.
