Parenting
My fifteen-year-old is staying out to all hours of the night. What do I do?
Question: The reason I type this question is that I have a 15-year-old son. He has been acting up over the last 2 to 3 months. He has always been a well-behaved lad. But over the last few months, he has been getting in with the wrong crowd at his high school. His grades are…
Read MoreWhen Your Child Leaves God
by Jim Lee Many of you parents who will read this, know by experience the horrific impact this circumstance can have on you. In the past, I have often sympathized and grieved with other brothers and sisters who have gone through the heart-wrenching experience of seeing a child of theirs turn their back on God,…
Read MoreIs it normal for a young child to connect their private parts to the idea of sex?
Question: Can you please tell me if children normally connect their private parts to the idea of sex or the reproductive parts of the opposite sex? I’m asking because I did so since around 7. Is it normal? Answer: A child, prior to puberty, has no built-in concept of what is sex. He will not…
Read MoreMy sixteen-year-old is becoming violent and I don’t know what to do
Question: I have a sixteen-year-old son that has had trouble in school specifically with grades over the past couple of years. His mother and I were divorced when he was nine but still communicate on a regular basis. Lately, he has become more physical while with her. He has been punching and kicking things for…
Read MoreI’m worried that my son will be too short
Question: I don’t know exactly what I need, but I definitely need help. Before getting back to obeying Christ and attending a church of Christ, I was out doing what I wanted to do and ended up pregnant. The baby’s father and I ended up getting married a few months after I had the baby.…
Read MoreI spanked my daughter for throwing things at me, but it just got worse. It just doesn’t seem like it is working
Question: I am at a loss with my four-year-old daughter. Spanking isn’t working. My husband and I agreed that we would spank only for lying and defiance and set ground rules and expectations with my daughter long ago for that. Here is the problem, spanking tends to make the problem worse. Example: she was told…
Read MoreMy older boys are into heavy metal music and black and skull clothing. What do I do?
Question: My husband and I are working on our marriage after his unfaithfulness. He wants to work it out and make things right, but I am afraid it may be too late as far as the kids are concerned. For almost ten years I had to do it all, raise the kids, pay the bills, housework,…
Read MoreFrom the point of view of parenting children, what am I to learn from Luke 2:41-52?
Question: From the point of view of parenting children, what am I to learn from Luke 2:41-52? What principle did Jesus learn from this experience? To obey his parents at all costs? Or it’s sometimes acceptable to disobey them, especially if it means not prioritizing the will of our Heavenly Father? What should children learn…
Read MoreI think spanking leads to more aggression
Question: I think spanking a 14-year-old young man is unreasonable and will lead to more aggression. My parents spanked me with the belt and left bruises. It left scars on my soul and was not focused on loving correction. I am very conservative in my theology and think this Scripture did mean spanking when younger…
Read MoreOne of my boys is starting to wet his pants when I give him a spanking. What should I do?
Question: I have a problem with one of my boys. A few times he has had a wet spot when being spanked. At first, I was shocked and thought I was overdoing the spanking and from the pain of the spanking that he had lost control, but it was not any harder or lighter than…
Read MoreMy almost 18-year-old daughter appears to be seeing a lesbian. What can I do?
Question: I have a 17-year-old daughter, soon to turn 18. I am a single mom. Her dad lives in another state but does back me on my decisions regarding discipline. She only sees him two or three times a year so he is not really the disciplinarian. After a lengthy boyfriend relationship went sour (the…
Read MoreExpect More Out of Your Kids
by Matthew Allen Earlier this week, I participated in a discussion concerning alcohol and advertising. The debate was over whether alcohol companies target youth in their advertising. There is very strong evidence to suggest that the alcohol companies do in fact target adolescent audiences even though such persons are under the legal age to consume alcohol.…
Read MoreMy parents are too overbearing. Do I have to obey them even though I’m 18?
Question: My parents are too overbearing. They are allowing me to live home, but when I am out with friends and a particular girl I like, I miss curfew and my dad told me the next time I was home late, he would punish me. I work a part-time job and they are paying half…
Read MoreBecause It Is Right
by Jim R. Everett Reward incentive motivation permeates our society. People respond to rewards just like little puppies do. Some parents think only in terms of rewarding their children, and, they even reward them for being bad. When a parent says to a little child, “If you will quit throwing a temper tantrum, we will…
Read MoreHow do you change when you made a mess of raising your children?
Question: How do you change things that have gotten worse? I am a single mother of four all by different fathers. I have always known the Word but refused to follow it, all along knowing I was making the wrong decisions. It’s no wonder why my 14-year-old is where she is at this point. I…
Read MoreI’m teaching a group of 13-17 year girls and would like to address decision making, relationships, and sex. Do you have any suggestions?
Question: Hey! I’ve been put in charge of taking the girls’ night at a youth group and I am doing it on decision making, relationships, sex, etc. I would love it if you could give me some tips on what to say to them about it. Their ages are between 13 and 17. I was…
Read MoreShould I let my children go over to my worldly family’s homes?
Question: Hi! I have a question about people that I and my children associate with. Most of my family are in second marriages, some don’t even believe in God. I have a (female) friend who is married to someone who is divorced. She said that his ex-wife cheated on him, I do not know what…
Read MoreMy nine-year-old is lazy and nothing seems to work
Question: I am having issues with my nine-year-old son. He has such a bad and lazy attitude about school, school work, and homework (and most things he is told to do). He has the ability to do the work, but he seems to don’t care. He has been like this since kindergarten; so I know it’s…
Read MoreI found out my 12-year-old son is looking at pornography. How do I handle it?
Question: My son is 12 and is at present in the eighth grade. I have got ample evidence that he is visiting some pornography sites secretly. His friends in the school told him about these dirty web sites and how to find them. How I should handle this issue? We are born again Christians. This…
Read MoreHow do you prevent sibling rivalry?
Question: I was reading some thoughts shared recently by those who are finishing up their years of homeschooling their children. One thing that struck me, in particular, was one mother’s mention of how she enjoyed her children’s teenage years. That is really something! My five daughters currently range in age from 1 year to almost…
Read MoreQuestions about spanking, privacy, and clothing choices.
Question: I have three boys who are actually not my stepsons yet. Their mother, who is widowed, and I are going to be married in about two weeks. We are maintaining a biblical relationship. However, I am a teacher, so I am free to handle childcare over the summer, where she is not. In order…
Read MoreMy 14-year-old has become rude, a poor student, and mean to his younger brother. What do I do?
Question: I have a fourteen-year-old son. In the past year, he has become very verbally rude. He is not doing well in school. He cannot get along with his little brother, who is seven. He used to be so sweet and loving and now I’m so worried about him. I know drugs are not an…
Read MoreParents: Consistency is a Key!
by Greg Gwin All godly parents are concerned about bringing up their children to be good, God-fearing people. In fact, we are commanded to do so (Ephesians 6:4). There are lots of negative influences in the world that make this an increasingly difficult job. We worry about the impact of the schools, peer pressure, wickedness…
Read MoreIs Love to Blame?
by Steve Klein Have you ever known parents who claimed that they loved their children too much to spank them? Ever known someone who tried to justify having sex outside of marriage because they loved the person? Ever known a Christian who would not rebuke and correct religious errors because they loved others too much…
Read MoreHow to Raise a Heartache
by Edward O. Bragwell, Sr. via The Auburn Beacon “The rod and rebuke give wisdom, but a child left to himself brings shame to his mother” (Proverbs 29:15). Though I have been a father for many years and a grandfather for a few years, I still do not claim to be an expert on child-rearing. I…
Read MoreDoes Spanking Cause Lower IQ in Children?
by Sam Stinson “He who withholds his rod hates his son, But he who loves him disciplines him diligently” (Proverbs 13:24). I like to think that most scientific studies are not politically motivated. However, when I read about studies like the following, I’m forced to rethink this belief. A study recently presented by the International…
Read MoreDad’s Nine Rules for Living
by Frank Walton Upon the occasion of his daughter’s high school graduation. via Biblical Insights, Vol. 7, No. 8, Aug. 2007. 1. Put God First We exist for His glory and then to enjoy Him forever (I John 17:3). “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and the knowledge of the Holy One…
Read MoreThe Children
https://www.lavistachurchofchrist.org/cms/wp-content/uploads/2007/09/2007Fall5TheChildren.mp3 by Scott Smelser The Family
Read MoreParenting Mistakes
https://www.lavistachurchofchrist.org/cms/wp-content/uploads/2007/09/2007Fall4ParentingMistakes.mp3 by Scott Smelser The Family
Read MoreDiscipline
https://www.lavistachurchofchrist.org/cms/wp-content/uploads/2007/09/2007Fall3Discipline.mp3 by Scott Smelser The Family
Read MoreRearing a Second Family
by Jim Sasser In our local paper last Sunday and Tuesday there were different articles and statistics concerning children that are being basically reared by their grandparents. This means that they are rearing a second family. I am fortunate enough to have 20 wonderful grandchildren. If an emergency should arise, even though my dear wife…
Read MoreHis Parents Were Too Strict
by Boyd Sellers Have you ever heard that statement? You’ll see some scraggly kid who cares about nothing and nobody, who has long ago left the Lord (though he may have been faithfully “going to church”), and who has literally broken his parents’ hearts. You ask a friend, “What happened to him?” And he answers,…
Read MoreFamily Time Together Is Essential
by W. Frank Walton in Biblical Insights, Vol. 5, No. 8, August 2005 Time together is the bonding mortar that binds family members together before God in love Giving Thanks Psalm 107 “Hear, my son, and accept My sayings and the years of your life will be many. I have directed you in the way of…
Read MoreOur son started doing poorly in school
Question: I have a serious problem with my oldest son who is 17. My wife and I have raised him in church and he attends a Christian school. This past semester, he led us to believe he was doing all right in school. I received his report card and he has two failing grades. My…
Read MoreHow much sleep do teenagers need? I can’t seem to get mine to wake up in the morning
Question: I have heard varying studies on the amount of sleep that kids, and even adults, need to function in the day. My two remaining children are not morning people unless there is something they really want to do! I really think they may need more sleep. In contemplating how to make this year go…
Read MoreI think I’m being too controlling
Question: My being too controlling on the kids is generally directed toward my eldest. He is a great child: very respectful, wins awards for citizenship, and all the teachers adore him and praise him. My problem is I snap at him for anything. Instead of being able to let it roll off, I have to…
Read MoreWhat do we do about a son who failed his college classes and lied to hide the fact?
Question: I am writing for advice on my son who is 18. He went away to college which my wife and I help pay for, in addition to a scholarship he obtained at the Christian college. He finished up this semester but failed two classes. He has a chance to earn the credits back if…
Read MoreHow do I punish a child who is now bigger than me?
Question: I have been struggling with the issue of discipline with our older two children. Traditionally, in our family, when a child reaches age twelve it is generally assumed that they are too old to be spanked and other punishments, such as grounding, are used. Our son is sixteen and beginning to show tremendous disrespect.…
Read MoreHow do I appropriately discipline my sons?
Question: First, let me say that I’m glad I found your site and I appreciate your parenting advice. I am a widower with two teenage sons – 17 going on 18 and 14 going on 15. I’ve to come to the point where I need to make some decisions about discipline in our household and…
Read MoreWhen should a teenager start buying his own toiletries?
Question: When should a teenager start buying his own toiletries? Answer: When a teenager has cosmetics, soaps, shampoos, shaving cream, etc. that he wants of a specific brand and desires to use exclusively, then it is time to start purchasing them on his own. For example, if he uses the same shampoo that most of…
Read More