Adolescence
Our nine-year-old is seeking boys’ attention by letting her underwear show
Question: We are a dresses-only family. My daughter is (deliberately?) not careful when running and playing and her underwear is showing. She has lost some of her treasured outfits. We raise her to dress very modestly. Last time she was on the swings during a church picnic seeking the boys’ attention. Other parents noticed. I’m…
Read MoreShould I force my 14-year-old son to work even if he doesn’t feel comfortable?
Question: Should I force my 14-year-old son to work even if he doesn’t feel comfortable? Answer: Oh, the poor thing! It is so hard to be motivated when you don’t feel like working, isn’t it? Why don’t you set him a great example: when the alarm clock rings tomorrow morning, instead of dragging yourself out…
Read MoreMy son continues to backtalk us and punches his younger brother
Question: I just wanted to say thanks for contending for the faith, in relation to the person who wrote you against the Bible. I need further help with my son, who is 14. My wife and I have set the punishment for disobedience for both our sons. In addition to moving along if there are…
Read MoreI discovered one of my stepsons is looking at pornography
Question: I recently discovered that at least one of my stepsons had downloaded pornography on their computer, which is in their shared bedroom. The fourteen-year-old seems to be the guilty culprit, but he won’t own up. The twelve-year-old says it wasn’t him, and I believe him. The law says I’m within my right to beat…
Read MoreWe are constantly having to nag our daughter to get her chores done
Question: I have a nine-year-old who is developing an attitude that we are always nagging and she can’t do what she wants. Every time I ask her to do a chore she says yes, I go away, come back later and it won’t be done. This can happen three or four times before she gets…
Read MoreI’m embarrassed that I spanked my daughter for skipping classes
Question: I am a recently separated mom of three children ages 13, 10 and 8. The older two are girls. My thirteen-year-old really started to act up this school year, only a few months after her father and I separated. She was caught skipping classes twice earlier in the school year. I had to take…
Read MoreDoes my son enjoy being spanked?
Question: I read the wealth of information your web site offers with regard to child rearing. I must say that I agree with most of what you say here. I have found the rod to be much more effective than the wooden spoon once I started using one almost two years ago. I have a…
Read MoreHow do I tell my son about puberty?
Question: How do I tell my son about puberty? Answer: First, as your child grows, look for teachable moments. These are times when your child asks you questions that can be used to discuss important matters without making it seem like a major production. For example, your little boy might tell you “I’m glad my…
Read MoreAre bare-bottom spankings necessary?
Question: I’m glad I came across your website and read so many things from other dads of older boys. I’m a single dad of a 13-year-old boy. I’ve been needing to spank him for his improper attitude, but I have been very afraid to. Mostly because I’m uptight about male nudity, but I realize that…
Read MoreHow do I deal with my daughters stealing?
Question: I need some help solving a problem that I have with my daughters. Any advice or suggestions would be welcomed. I am writing in simple Spanish in hopes that you will not have difficulties in understanding it. If you do have problems, I will write in broken English. I believe that in Spanish or…
Read MoreHow can you spank when the child refuses to submit to a spanking?
Question: In relation to using the rod with our sons who are 14 and 10, we started to use a switch and made changes to the way we spanked about a year ago after reading the information on your website. We talked with the boys and we all decided to use spanking in certain acts…
Read MoreHow do I deal with a sassy daughter?
Question: I need some advice on how to handle a sassy daughter. Time outs don’t work (even long ones!) and she is too old to spank. She is a very sensitive child with a sharp tongue and quick temper, constantly testing the boundaries. My husband and I are having a hard time figuring out how…
Read MoreMy fifteen-year-old has become violent and domineering
Question: My oldest boy is 15 years old. Recently he has become violent and domineering. All the conversations that we have had with him haven’t helped much. He continues to pretend that now he is 15 years old he has the right to be free and to behave as he pleases. When we threaten punishment,…
Read MoreHow can I help someone who attempted suicide?
Question: I have a problem that I have never had to deal with before and pray that I will not experience anything like it again. One of our member’s granddaughter attempted suicide, by an overdose of prescription medication, last night. She is only fifteen years old, a very sweet young girl, but one that is…
Read MoreWhy does my son lie about his homework?
Question: Why does my son lie about his homework? Answer: People commit sins because they determine that momentary pleasure exceeds the consequences. The Bible mentions: “By faith Moses, when he became of age, refused to be called the son of Pharaoh’s daughter, choosing rather to suffer affliction with the people of God than to enjoy…
Read MoreWhat do you suggest is a proper bedtime for preteens and teenagers?
Question: Thank you for a great site. I have one question. I have three children: two girls (ages 15 and 9) and a boy (age 12). One of my daughters asked permission to sleepover at one of her girlfriend’s home. I contacted the girlfriend’s mother and informed her about my daughter’s bedtime. She was very…
Read MoreMy son has become defiant and repeats the same sins
Question: I have a question in relation to child training. My son is 14 and I have to occasionally give him a spanking. However, he has been getting in trouble with the same sin. He continues to defy his mom. I read your articles on the website in regards to using the rod. I usually…
Read MoreHow do I prepare my nine-year-old daughter for puberty?
Question: I have a young 9-year-old girl and I’m trying to learn more about how to handle her upcoming puberty. It’s going to be hard for her to learn how to handle her young sexual desires. I have no idea what it’s like for girls. I’ll have to lean on my wife quite a bit.…
Read MoreDo boys get into trouble more because they are not taught to communicate?
Question: It’s good to know there are men like yourself in the world. It’s unfortunate that not enough men use old fashioned values for raising their sons. And it’s made worse when fathers do not support each other. I have two boys, 13 and 15. Good kids but rowdy as lots of boys are. My…
Read MoreShould kids swim with the opposite sex?
Question: I would like to ask why mixed swimming wasn’t discussed in your article, “Proper Attire”? To me, wearing any bathing suit is as close to being naked as you can get. There is nothing left to anyone’s imagination. Even if a person is clothed from head to toe, going to a public swimming pool…
Read MoreNotes on Adolescence and Teenagers
Genesis 37:2-4 “This is the history of Jacob. Joseph, being seventeen years old, was feeding the flock with his brothers. And the lad was with the sons of Bilhah and the sons of Zilpah, his father’s wives; and Joseph brought a bad report of them to his father. Now Israel loved Joseph more than all…
Read MoreHow can I make my daughter interested in studying?
Question: My daughter is 12 years old and in the seventh standard at an Indian convent. She does not have any interest in studying. Please let me know what I can do to make her study. Answer: In order for education to take place, there needs to be a teacher willing to teach, a student…
Read MoreI Saw a Child
by Leo Rogol (1969) What I saw was not what one reads about children in storybooks and poems: It was not the beauty of childish innocence; the simple trusting faith in something big, wide, and wonderful; a child roaming the fields with his beloved dog, searching out the marvelous mysteries and wonders of nature. Though…
Read MoreHow do you prevent teenagers from having pre-marital sex?
Question: How do you prevent teenagers from having pre-marital sex? Answer: “We have a little sister, and she has no breasts; what shall we do for our sister on the day when she is spoken for? If she is a wall, we will build on her a battlement of silver; but if she is a…
Read MoreHow do you handle a teenage liar?
Question: Our 13-year-old lies about everything to get what he wants. He lies about not having homework when he does. He hides bad homework from us. We talk to the teachers every day now. He continues to lie even though he knows he is going to get caught. We must search his backpack every night.…
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