When does Matthew 5:28 apply?
Question:
Hello,
I have a few questions about porn and lust. Jesus says, “Whoever looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart” (Matthew 5:28). What does that mean if I’m unmarried? Am I a fornicator at heart?
I saw the next question on social media: Do those teachings apply today? Does Matthew 5:28 looking at a woman lustfully apply to digital porn today? He claimed that since they didn’t have the technology for digital porn in Jesus’ day, it’s not a sin.
The last question that I have was also asked by somebody on social media who asked: “Is it adultery at heart if you’re watching porn with your wife or husband?”
Answer:
Regarding whether Matthew 5:28 applies to unmarried people, see "Is Matthew 5:28 only limited to lusting after a married woman?" There is a long discussion there proving that adultery was used to illustrate a class of problems, including fornication.
When you are looking at pornography, you are lusting after a woman you are not married to and are likely never to marry. Yet, you are thinking about having sex with her or someone like her. God wants you to be set apart as someone dedicated to His service. "For this is the will of God, your sanctification" (I Thessalonians 4:3). "Sanctification" is to be set apart for a holy purpose. You can't be holy with your clothes off having sex with a prostitute or girlfriends. "that is, that you abstain from sexual immorality" (I Thessalonians 4:3). How do you stay out of fornication? "That each of you know how to possess his own vessel in sanctification and honor" (I Thessalonians 4:4). Your vessel is your body. It is the container for your soul. You have to control your body. It should not be controlling your decisions. Your decisions should control your actions, and you should treat yourself as something holy and honorable because Christ purchased you with His own blood. How do you lose control of your body? "Not in lustful passion, like the Gentiles who do not know God" (I Thessalonians 4:5). "Lustful" and "passion" translate two Greek synonyms for lust. It refers to passionate things designed to stimulate lust in you. You can't expect to control yourself when you put yourself in situations where someone is encouraging you to think about sex. You can't control your sexual urges while watching pornography and thinking about how to get women to let you have sex with them.
The truth that God desires you to be sanctified is so important you cannot allow anyone to deceive you into thinking differently. "And that no man transgress and defraud his brother in the matter because the Lord is the avenger in all these things, just as we also told you before and solemnly warned you. For God has not called us for the purpose of impurity, but in sanctification. So, he who rejects this is not rejecting man but the God who gives His Holy Spirit to you" (I Thessalonians 4:6-8).
Like all other sins, fornication starts with the problem of lust (Mark 7:21-23).
"Is there anything of which one might say, "See this, it is new"? Already it has existed for ages which were before us. There is no remembrance of earlier things; and also of the later things which will occur, there will be for them no remembrance among those who will come later still" (Ecclesiastes 1:10-11).
“Lustful passion” in I Thessalonians 4:5 refers to things depicting passionate or erotic things to generate lust in the viewer or reader. Nothing in the definition requires it to be real or directly based on reality. A painting, a photograph or video, decorations on a vase, a cartoon image, or a description in a book can all done for the purpose of causing you to lust. Just because the medium of the depiction has changed a bit, it doesn't mean the intent or the result is any different.
The argument that pornography is not a sin because porn is being delivered electronically and that didn't exist in Jesus' day is sadly humorous. Shall we say that people who kill someone with a gun did not commit murder because they didn't have guns back in Jesus' day? It isn't the tool being used that defines the sin.
The last argument is also poor. We established that looking at pornography is a sin. How does who you are with when you sin make a difference? Is it proper for a married man or woman to lust after someone they are not married to? Of course not! Think about what such a person is telling his or her spouse: "You aren't attractive enough to me, so I have to imagine you are someone else to have sex with you." That is not how you build a marriage.
