What is the proper punishment for mishandling funds and lying?

Question: Hello, I am 19 and a sophomore in college, but I still live at home. I have always strived to be a godly person and a hard worker. I was valedictorian of my high school class and captain of two sports teams and earned a college scholarship. I always try to do the “right”…

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Disciplining Children

by Jeffrey W. Hamilton Text: Hebrews 12:4-13   I.          It appears that at least some people realize that modern child-rearing philosophies don’t work. From our website people are continually looking for answers to questions, such as              A.         What kind of consequence or punishment should you give a child who lies, steals, is rebellious, is disobedient, is using…

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Is this spanking normal?

Question: This afternoon I was at my girlfriend’s house, and she has a 7-year-old son. He was not putting his toys away after he was done playing with them. My friend Gina asked him to please put his toys away, and he said “no” and back talked her. She grabbed him by the arm, told…

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How do you deal with an overactive six-year-old?

Question: I think for Christians, we must be careful not to depend on things of the world to do for us what we have been given the ability by God to do. And yet we must sometimes depend on others and other things to aid us in living our life to glorify Him. Even Timothy…

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How do you gauge how many swats to give in a spanking?

Question: How do I gauge when my son has been given enough swats — I have found as he gets older that he tries to “macho” through a spanking and it has become harder to tell when he has been chastised sufficiently without crossing the line into abuse. Answer: A parent should look at the discipline…

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Does my son enjoy being spanked?

Question: I read the wealth of information your web site offers with regard to child rearing. I must say that I agree with most of what you say here. I have found the rod to be much more effective than the wooden spoon once I started using one almost two years ago. I have a…

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What Do You Mean By Chasten?

by Gary Colley Jesus dictated these words to the apostle John for the church in Laodicea: “As many as I love, I rebuke and chasten” (Revelation 3:19). After this Bible reference appeared on a sign in the front of a church building, a phone call was received from a somewhat irate woman inquiring as to…

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How should I handle out-of-control teenage boys?

Question: First, let me apologize for not giving you enough details upon which to base a recommended course of action. Actually, the answer you gave, even without specifics, makes good sense: go after the most serious problems first and then move down the line, without dropping the ball on the first set of issues. I think…

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Should I spank my stepsons?

Question: I have just married a wonderful woman with two teenage boys who are out of control. They have not been spanked in years and I think it is time to re-institute that form of discipline into their life; at least until their behavior improves. My wife agrees to abide by your decision and recommendations,…

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How do you handle a manipulative girl?

Question: I think girls to be just as aggressive as boys but in a different way. Does God allow mean behaviors such as being manipulative and subversive to get what one wants? Please tell me, how do you turn around a catty, snippy or snooty child? Answer: Oh, I agree; aggression can be demonstrated in…

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Reasons to Discipline

by Bryan Matthew Dockens God commands Christians to discipline their brethren (Romans 16:17; II Thessalonians 3:6), yet many neglect to do so. Revealing the proper reasons for discipline may motivate the reluctant. We Discipline for Love Love is always the correct motive for fulfilling the Lord’s will (John 14:15), and so it is with discipline…

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NEEDED: The Discipline to Do the Unpleasant!

by William C. Sexton Some years ago I heard a sermon by a young preacher who made some pertinent points relative to a passage from I Kings 20:42, which says, “Then he said to him, “Thus says the LORD: ‘Because you have let slip out of <your> hand a man whom I appointed to utter…

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Could you explain Proverbs 26:3 and 19:29?

Question: Well, I can’t quite figure out: Proverbs 26:3 “A whip for the horse, a bridle for the donkey, and a rod for the fool’s back.” and: Proverbs 19:29 “Judgments are prepared for scoffers, and beatings for the backs of fools.” Answer: Proverbs 26:3 is dealing with control or the giving of direction. A rider of a…

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How do you get over the embarrassment of spanking a teenager?

Question: I’m glad I came across your website and read so many things from other dads of older boys. I’m a single dad of a 13-year-old boy. I’ve been needing to spank him for his improper attitude, but I have been very afraid to. Mostly because I’m uptight about male nudity, but I realize that…

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How do you handle a child with ADD or ADHD?

Question: A Christian friend has a child that has been diagnosed with ADD or ADHD. I keep this child once a week and I have several questions for those of you who are familiar with ADD or ADHD. The mother doesn’t want to give me much information because she feels I already have prejudiced views…

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How do I deal with my daughters stealing?

Question: I need some help solving a problem that I have with my daughters. Any advice or suggestions would be welcomed. I am writing in simple Spanish in hopes that you will not have difficulties in understanding it. If you do have problems, I will write in broken English. I believe that in Spanish or…

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How can you spank when the child refuses to submit to a spanking?

Question: In relation to using the rod with our sons who are 14 and 10, we started to use a switch and made changes to the way we spanked about a year ago after reading the information on your website. We talked with the boys and we all decided to use spanking in certain acts…

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How do I deal with a sassy daughter?

Question: I need some advice on how to handle a sassy daughter. Time outs don’t work (even long ones!) and she is too old to spank. She is a very sensitive child with a sharp tongue and quick temper, constantly testing the boundaries. My husband and I are having a hard time figuring out how…

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My fifteen-year-old has become violent and domineering

Question: My oldest boy is 15 years old. Recently he has become violent and domineering. All the conversations that we have had with him haven’t helped much. He continues to pretend that now he is 15 years old he has the right to be free and to behave as he pleases. When we threaten punishment,…

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My son has become defiant and repeats the same sins

Question: I have a question in relation to child training. My son is 14 and I have to occasionally give him a spanking. However, he has been getting in trouble with the same sin. He continues to defy his mom. I read your articles on the website in regards to using the rod. I usually…

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Did I do the right thing by spanking my child for pushing me?

Question: I have a question. My youngest son is 4 years old. Yesterday he pushed me and said some bad words. I was upset and I asked him to apologize, but he didn’t. Today his misbehavior returned. He did the same thing. I took him to his room, but he yelled, so I decided to spank him. Did…

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Eli and Being Soft on Sin

by Jeffrey W. Hamilton I.         There are many things to admire about the man Eli             A.        He judged Israel for 40 years; during which time he was God’s spokesman.             B.        We find no record of any outward evil or sin in his life.             C.        When Eli learns that Samuel will take his place, Eli does not rebel, grow bitter,…

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How should I punish my defiant 14-year-old son?

Question: I have a question in relation to child training. My son is 14 and I have to occasionally give him a spanking. However, he has been getting in trouble with the same sin. He continues to defy his mom. I read your articles on the website in regards to using the rod. I usually use…

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Is spanking a thirteen-year-old child illegal?

Question: Is spanking a thirteen-year-old child illegal? Answer: As of this writing, spanking remains legal in all fifty states of the United States. Almost all state statutes state that a parent or guardian can use reasonable and appropriate force to maintain discipline and to promote the well-being of a child’s welfare. Most states extend that…

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Notes on Disciplining Children

Purpose Change in behavior Proverbs 6:23 “For the commandment is a lamp, and the law a light; reproofs of instruction are the way of life” Proverbs 10:1 “A wise son makes a glad father, but a foolish son is the grief of his mother.” Proverbs 17:21 “He who begets a scoffer does so to his…

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Notes on Discipline of Children, Spanking

Deuteronomy 8:5 “You should know in your heart that as a man chastens his son, so the LORD your God chastens you.” [Note: “chastens” means to chastise literally with blows or figuratively with words] Deuteronomy 21:18 “If a man has a stubborn and rebellious son who will not obey the voice of his father or…

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Can spanking hurt a child’s feelings?

Question: My son was very rude and would not explain his behavior. I must mention that it has been over a month since the last time that I spanked him. At that time I gave him a spanking in front of everyone. It was very effective, so I used the same method this time. I…

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How do I chasten my teenager for using drugs?

Question: How do I chasten my teenager for using drugs? Question: What do I do if I find my teenager is using drugs? Answer: The use of drugs causes numerous problems for the parent as well as the child. Some of what I’m about to write will need to be modified for your particular situation…

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Should teachers spank children?

Question: I really think that discipline is necessary sometimes. I remember that even teachers used to spank. Do you think it is still a good system of discipline for today? Answer: “Is there anything of which it may be said, “See, this is new”? It has already been in ancient times before us. There is…

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Does a husband have the right to spank his wife?

Question: Does a husband have the right to spank his wife? Answer: Spanking is a form of discipline used by parents to correct their children, such as “He who spares his rod hates his son, but he who loves him disciplines him promptly” (Proverbs 13:24). The rod is a reference to a slender branch used…

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Our Father in Heaven

by Jeffrey W. Hamilton Text: Luke 11:1-13   I.         God calls us to be His special people – II Corinthians 6:16-18             A.        If we will separate ourselves from the world, God will be our Father and we will be His sons and daughters             B.        Why did God pick the role of a father to describe His relationship with…

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Disciplining Children

by Jeffrey W. Hamilton I.         The world in its wisdom comes up with many theories about how children ought to be raised.             A.        In the 1960s a psychologist named Benjamin Spock became famous with a book proposing that children should not be spanked                         1.         He argued that other, non-physical methods were just as effective                         2.         Spanking would damage a…

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How do you handle a teenage liar?

Question: Our 13-year-old lies about everything to get what he wants. He lies about not having homework when he does. He hides bad homework from us. We talk to the teachers every day now. He continues to lie even though he knows he is going to get caught. We must search his backpack every night.…

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How will male virtues be passed on without spanking?

Question: I am a Swedish man living in Denmark, not a Christian or religious at all, but I am brought up in a tradition where spanking and what my father called “male virtues” was normal. This was in the ’60s and beginning of the ’70s. I do agree that for boys it is a necessary…

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What to do when parents disagree about spanking?

Question: Whenever I switch one of the kids my wife has a fit. She begs me to use a different punishment. Her crying and shouting make it very difficult to administer a proper whipping to the youngster. Afterward, she is furious with me and may even give me the silent treatment for a few days.…

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Should I Beat My Child?

Donald P. Ames Guardian of Truth XXXI: 3, pp. 75, 87 February 5, 1987 Before you answer the above question, may I, first of all, ask if you really understood it? Webster defines “beat” all the way from “spank” to “flogging.” The Bible also uses it in a similar fashion. And, unfortunately, many people apply it…

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Raising Children

by Jeffrey W. Hamilton I.       This generation is full of unusual ideas about how to raise children           A.      Many are leftovers of failed experiments that continue to hang around.                     1.       Don’t spank children                               a.       It is a form of child abuse or could lead to it.                               b.       It is unnatural to restrict children                     2.       Ignore children – you have your own…

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How do we start biblical discipline when our children are already older?

Question: I have a question related to child discipline. I have a 13-year-old son and an 8-year-old son. My wife and I have recently realized the problems we caused by following non-biblical consequences with our boys. My oldest son has been lying, and my youngest has problems with obedience. I read your parenting articles and was…

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