Should I separate from my lying husband?
Question:
My marriage with my husband is troubling. He has a pattern of habitually lying about minor things, and it hurts. I want to figure out my options righteously in this marriage as it is hard to think. I can go days or months thinking something was true, only to find out it wasn’t. Is there any biblical form of separation for this? I find it hard to put the pieces together to work this out because the trust is breaking so much. Please help me to know any biblical remedies for this.
In addition, I would like to say that ever since I confronted him about this, he has made small efforts to let me in on things or tell the truth, even when it’s uncomfortable. However, I still want to know how to deal with it.
Answer:
I'm trying to figure out how breaking your marriage covenant fixes your husband's sin. You don't fix a wrong with another wrong.
What seems to be missing is an understanding of why your husband chooses to lie. Knowing why, you could help him by encouraging him to tell the truth.
Question:
It is due to a lack of trust and respect. Before marriage, I knew him to keep his word. Also, the average is 4 to 5 times a day when it comes to the lies. I would rather not waste away my years wondering whether or not my husband has committed adultery. His simply telling me that he hasn’t is a red flag because he is a liar. He says he’ll write things out to remember the words he keeps to me, but that only lasts as long as he can remember to write things down, which is not the majority of the time. It is always due to whoever gives him the same advice of writing things down. There is no urge to do this unless confronted with a lie or someone recommends writing things down. There have been incredibly sensitive things that need to be remembered that he will forget all the time. Things having to do with my safety, etc. For example, I’ll ask my husband if he locked the door. He said yes, and someone had walked into our home due to the lie, which is a true story. This type of thing happens all the time. I have a lot to remember and care for at home, so I remind him of things. However, remembering everything and constantly reminding him to remember what I need him to remember is a lot. Writing things down and setting alarms is something I mentioned at the beginning of our marriage. I always get caught looking foolish when I trust him. So, to answer your question, that’s it.
Answer:
Someone unable to remember things is different from someone telling a lie. You seem to be describing a person with problems in his short-term memory. Has a doctor examined him? Is he taking medication or using some type of drug that affects his memory? I would suggest checking into those sorts of things.
Response:
Okay, we will look into these things.