My parents don’t think the girl I want to marry is good looking enough. What should I do?


I'm 24 years old and a Christian by faith. I fell in love with a girl at my workplace. She, too, is a Christian. I thought my parents would accept her, but on the contrary, they did not. My parents have not even allowed me to speak my mind.

I feel terrible within. After all, what's wrong with loving a girl? My parents have rejected her on the basis that she is not good looking. But why would that be of concern when I see her as the most beautiful person I have ever met, both in terms of beauty and character?

I feel angry with my parents. Help me out. What have I to do now? How will I be able to tell her about this?


"Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh" (Genesis 2:24).

The decision for who you will marry is yours and not your parents. It is good to have your parents' advice and blessing if they will give it, but the final decision is your own to make. You don't have to convince them, you have to make up your own mind. That is why the Bible states that to start a new home a man has to first sever his ties with his parents. You ought to factor into your decision the advice of your parents simply because they have more experience than you do. However, even good parents make mistakes at times. Unless there is something that you are leaving out, deciding a marriage based solely on looks is foolish.

Since in your country, you are well past the legal age of 21 to get married, there is no requirement that you need your parent's permission.

If you decide that your parents are mistaken and are not making sound judgment, then make arrangements to get married and invite them to the wedding. Tell them if they wish to remain in your life and see their grandchildren, then they need to find a way to accept your wife and be polite to her.

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