Is God sending me signs?

Question:

Does God send us signs? I have known this guy well for five years. He and I just clicked so well, and when we are together everything is so easy. However, he lives in a different state, though he still comes back to visit me and his family. We have talked about being together someday, and that right now is not the right time to settle down. Since then, I have thought about him literally every day. I don't do it on purpose, I just see things like a huge trailer with his last name on it or a movie where the main character has his first and last name, or hear things that bring me back to him. It really hurts sometimes to be so far away from him, but most of the time I'm OK with it because I have this deep feeling that everything will work out someday. Like I just know that he's the one for me, so I just have to wait. I often feel like this is a lesson in patience and faith. In believing in something that can't be googled online. Are all these signs placed before me so that I can learn to have faith and patience?

Answer:

Actually, the Bible teaches us that patience comes from difficulties, not reminders. "My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing" (James 1:2-5).

When you ask if you are being sent signs, the answer is "no." Signs are miracles, events that happen that go against the natural order of things. For example, when Hezekiah was ill, God gave him a sign to prove that he would get better: God had the sun move backward in the sky. "And this is the sign to you from the LORD, that the LORD will do this thing which He has spoken: Behold, I will bring the shadow on the sundial, which has gone down with the sun on the sundial of Ahaz, ten degrees backward." So the sun returned ten degrees on the dial by which it had gone down" (Isaiah 38:7-8). If you start thinking about all that had to have happened physically for this to take place, this wasn't a coincidence.

Now, think about what you have been calling "signs." They are all natural things that happen daily. The reason you are taking note of them is solely because you are focused on this particular man. Others would see this same thing and would not notice.

Let me give you an example: There is an old wives' tale that bad events come in threes. The truth is good and bad things happen all the time. But because a person is expecting a series of three bad events, he starts counting them until he reaches three (meanwhile ignoring anything good that is also happening). The three bad events do not prove the old wives' tale. It only proves how we filter things to what we consider to be important.

I'm glad you like this man and that this relationship has shown the ability to endure, but you are focusing on your feelings and you need to be considering factual matters. Is he good husband material? Do you get along well, or are there frequent fights? Do you have similar goals or are your lives going in two different directions? Is he faithful to you? Will he be a good provider? Etc. It is his character that you should be considering and examining.

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