I’m tired of sinning sexually
Question:
Good evening,
I write to you because I am tired of sinning sexually. When I think I have overcome it, I fall again, and I sin with prostitutes when I know that I am a minister. I have a relationship with the Lord, yet I continue to sin and look for someone to sin with, and I have done it many times. I have asked God to have a heart after His, yet I keep falling and just did it again recently.
I feel terrible. I want to stop falling into sin. I want God to forgive me, not to lose my girlfriend or my ministry; that's why I'm afraid to tell my pastor and her. Is there any way God can forgive me and throw that sin to the bottom of the sea?
I appreciate your time.
Best regards.
Answer:
"Men do not despise a thief if he steals to satisfy himself when he is hungry; but when he is found, he must repay sevenfold; he must give all the substance of his house. The one who commits adultery with a woman is lacking sense; he who would destroy himself does it" (Proverbs 6:30-32).
I know you are looking for sympathy and that you see yourself as a victim, but the truth of the matter is that no man has to have sex. No matter how you look at the matter, you have no excuse.
You did not mention why you seek out sin and want it so badly that you'll pay someone to have sex with you. However, I notice that you seem to expect God to stop you from sinning. You want God to remove the sin, but the Bible tells the sinner to repent (change). God doesn't take away your free will. What you are doing has been by your choice. You are the one looking for sex, paying prostitutes, and committing fornication. You are fully responsible for your actions. Therefore, it is your choice to stop. "I now rejoice, not that you were made sorrowful, but that you were made sorrowful to the point of repentance; for you were made sorrowful according to the will of God, so that you might not suffer loss in anything through us. For the sorrow that is according to the will of God produces a repentance without regret, leading to salvation, but the sorrow of the world produces death. For behold what earnestness this very thing, this godly sorrow, has produced in you: what vindication of yourselves, what indignation, what fear, what longing, what zeal, what avenging of wrong! In everything you demonstrated yourselves to be innocent in the matter" (II Corinthians 7:9-11). Until you take responsibility for your actions and yield your choices to be as God directs, you'll keep stumbling.
"Then the Lord knows how to rescue the godly from temptation, and to keep the unrighteous under punishment for the day of judgment, and especially those who indulge the flesh in its corrupt desires and despise authority. Daring, self-willed, they do not tremble when they revile angelic Majesties, whereas angels who are greater in might and power do not bring a reviling judgment against them before the Lord. But these, like unreasoning animals, born as creatures of instinct to be captured and killed, reviling where they have no knowledge, will in the destruction of those creatures also be destroyed, suffering wrong as the wages of doing wrong. They count it a pleasure to revel in the daytime. They are stains and blemishes, reveling in their deceptions, as they carouse with you, having eyes full of adultery that never cease from sin, enticing unstable souls, having a heart trained in greed, accursed children; forsaking the right way, they have gone astray, having followed the way of Balaam, the son of Beor, who loved the wages of unrighteousness" (II Peter 2:9-15).
