What if the man I want to marry turns out to be a polygamist?


Good afternoon sir,

I'm in a relationship with a guy who comes from a polygamous family I love him and want to marry him but I'm scared of the future. His mother is harsh, and although I've been praying about it, I am worried about the future. What if he turns out to be a polygamist and his family turns against me? I really long for a peaceful home with my family and in-laws.

Thanks, sir.


You don't make decisions based on what might happen. You decide who you will marry based on who the man you are dating is. Look at today's problems and not borrow possible problems from the future. "So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own" (Matthew 6:34).

You make no mention of what the man you are dating thinks about polygamy. Is he for it? Is he against it? Does he live by the principles of God or the traditions of his elders? If you have discussed these questions with him, then why don't you trust his answers? After all, trust is a foundation of love (I Corinthians 13:4-8).

Similarly, you are marrying the man and not his relatives. If you expect his relatives to change once you are married, you are sadly mistaken. People tend to be consistent unless they have a reason to change their lives. If you want to have a great relationship with your mother-in-law, then you are marrying the wrong man because his mother will always treat you poorly. But if the two of you are planning to live independently of your respective families, then your in-laws' attitudes will not matter.


Wow, thanks so much, sir. I'm indeed blessed.

More grace to you, sir. God bless you.
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