Was I truly born again?

Question:

Hello,

I had a question regarding baptism. I was baptized a few years ago when I was around 20 years old; however, I struggled with sexual immorality and lust with my girlfriend for a long time. Eventually, we got married. After this, I started to think baptism wasn't necessary for the forgiveness of sins, but I eventually realized it was. But considering all of this, I have been struggling since then to understand if I am a true Christian and if I was truly born again or if I should be re-baptized.

On a side note, I also struggle with scruples and doubt, always fearing I will do something wrong if I have the smallest amount of doubt.

Thank you in advance.

Answer:

Over the years, I've seen that people suffering from scrupulosity (religious OCD) cannot stand uncertainty. They try to remove uncertainty by adding strict rules for themselves, but often, those rules are ones no one can keep. Instead of bringing them peace, those self-imposed rules make them more miserable.

What I understand from your note is that you've struggled with lust, sensuality, and fornication for several years. I wasn't clear whether this started before you were baptized and continued afterward or started after your baptism. I'm going to assume that it started before your baptism and that you were hoping that those sins would stop when you became a Christian. When you realized that the temptations continued and you frequently yielded to sin, you concluded that baptism didn't bring forgiveness of sins since you were still sinning. In your mind, you assumed that being forgiven would mean that you would stop sinning.

God is clear that temptation is always present. Even Jesus was tempted. Where he did not yield to sin, we are weaker. John wrote to Christians, "If we say that we have no sin, we are deceiving ourselves and the truth is not in us" (I John 1:8). There will always be something I need to work on. I might not sin constantly or daily, but the struggle against sin is a part of daily life. The difference between the Christian and the non-Christian is that a Christian doesn't accept the presence of sin in his life. He battles his impulses to improve himself. "Little children, make sure no one deceives you; the one who practices righteousness is righteous, just as He is righteous; the one who practices sin is of the devil; for the devil has sinned from the beginning. The Son of God appeared for this purpose, to destroy the works of the devil" (I John 3:7-8). Christians don't make a habit of sin. We practice righteousness. This doesn't mean a Christian never or rarely sins. John is saying that a Christian refuses to stay in sin. "My little children, I am writing these things to you so that you may not sin. And if anyone sins, we have an Advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous; and He Himself is the propitiation for our sins; and not for ours only, but also for those of the whole world" (I John 2:1-2). When a Christian sins and then turns away from it, confessing his faults, God offers forgiveness. "If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness" (I John 1:9). This is what we mean by God's grace. We don't deserve or are owed forgiveness. We made too much of a mess of our lives. However, God offers us an incredible gift. We can always be forgiven, if we will just let go of our sins. This isn't a license to sin. The Christian remains steadfast against sin. "What shall we say then? Are we to continue in sin so that grace may increase? May it never be! How shall we who died to sin still live in it?" (Romans 6:1-2). However, we trust in God's love for us and His promise to forgive us when we are less than perfect.

Thus, for a Christian, sin doesn't mean he never became a Christian. It means he has been too weak, and he needs to battle harder. It isn't about the past, it is about where he is going. "Brethren, I do not regard myself as having laid hold of it yet; but one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus" (Philippians 3:13-14). I know I can't reach heaven while remaining in sin, so I let go of my sins and work to do better in the future. I show faith by trusting that God keeps His promise even though I don't deserve it. This isn't about being perfect. No man outside of Christ has been perfect or will be perfect. "For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God" (Romans 3:23).

It would not save me if I could somehow manage to keep the law perfectly. "Nevertheless knowing that a man is not justified by the works of the Law but through faith in Christ Jesus, even we have believed in Christ Jesus, so that we may be justified by faith in Christ and not by the works of the Law; since by the works of the Law no flesh will be justified" (Galatians 2:16). Faith in Jesus is the key, not trust in human perfection. God desires to save everyone (II Peter 3:9). Those He manages to save are not perfect people, but they work to become more like their God. "But if, while seeking to be justified in Christ, we ourselves have also been found sinners, is Christ then a minister of sin? May it never be! For if I rebuild what I have once destroyed, I prove myself to be a transgressor" (Galatians 2:17-18). We don't excuse sin or accept sin in our lives. However, we know sin happens and God is gracious to forgive us when we leave our sins.

Are you a faithful Christian? That depends on what you are doing with your life today. As far as I know, you did what God asked of you to become His child. Now, it is past time to live as His child.

"Therefore, prepare your minds for action, keep sober in spirit, fix your hope completely on the grace to be brought to you at the revelation of Jesus Christ. As obedient children, do not be conformed to the former lusts which were yours in your ignorance, but like the Holy One who called you, be holy yourselves also in all your behavior; because it is written, "You shall be holy, for I am holy." If you address as Father the One who impartially judges according to each one's work, conduct yourselves in fear during the time of your stay on earth; knowing that you were not redeemed with perishable things like silver or gold from your futile way of life inherited from your forefathers, but with precious blood, as of a lamb unblemished and spotless, the blood of Christ" (I Peter 1:13-19).

Response:

Thank you for the thoughtful reply, and I hope you have a blessed day.