Should I heed the words of a prophet in regard to who I marry?


Good day.

I found your web site after I googled the phrase 'prophets telling you whom to marry'. I was rather intrigued by the answers I found on your web site and decided to send you an email to ask for your advice.

I have been going out with a young man for six years. That he loves me is not in doubt by me or by the people around me.

However, when we first began to talk about getting married two years back, I went off to see a prophet after being advised by a friend. The prophet I met told me that my fiance was with me because he had no cash. He said that my fiance knew that a girl in my class was hard to come by and that was the reason he was sticking by me. He also said the minute my fiance began making money, he would change and become mean. In other words, money would change him. The next one said if I married my fiance, I would be stepping into a marriage filled with suffering. I personally don't think that any one of them is right.

But that notwithstanding, how do I know that he is the man God wants me to marry? I have prayed and stood in prayer, but I don't seem to hear clearly. Are we allowed to base our decisions on the words a prophet?


If you recall from my prior answers, there are no modern-day prophets; at least not prophets of God. Paul stated that prophecy would come to an end. "Love never fails. But whether there are prophecies, they will fail; whether there are tongues, they will cease; whether there is knowledge, it will vanish away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part. But when that which is perfect has come, then that which is in part will be done away" (I Corinthians 13:8-10). The perfect is referring to the perfect law of liberty in Christ (James 1:25). The spiritual gifts were a temporary measure in place until the New Testament could be written. Once the law was recorded, the temporary measures would end. "When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child; but when I became a man, I put away childish things" (I Corinthians 13:10).

Since prophecy is no longer in the world, the man claiming to be a prophet is a fraud. The things he is claiming are merely lies. He might have gotten a few statements about the future correct, but he has missed a lot of things. That is important to notice because a prophet isn't supposed to be speaking his own words, but God's. God knows the future perfectly. If a prophet were speaking for God, he would never be wrong. "And if you say in your heart, 'How shall we know the word which the LORD has not spoken?' - when a prophet speaks in the name of the LORD, if the thing does not happen or come to pass, that is the thing which the LORD has not spoken; the prophet has spoken it presumptuously; you shall not be afraid of him" (Deuteronomy 18:21-22). It has been two years. I would hope that by now your fiance is earning a living, has he become mean? I didn't think so.

Think about it. How is your consultation of these so-called prophets any different than worldly people consulting with psychics? How are you any different from Saul demanding to know the future by consulting the witch at Endor?

A person can't hear if they keep their hands over their ears.

"Hear, my children, the instruction of a father, and give attention to know understanding; for I give you good doctrine: do not forsake my law. When I was my father's son, tender and the only one in the sight of my mother, he also taught me, and said to me:

"Let your heart retain my words; keep my commands, and live. Get wisdom! Get understanding! Do not forget, nor turn away from the words of my mouth. Do not forsake her, and she will preserve you; love her, and she will keep you. Wisdom is the principal thing; therefore get wisdom. And in all your getting, get understanding. Exalt her, and she will promote you; she will bring you honor, when you embrace her. She will place on your head an ornament of grace; a crown of glory she will deliver to you."

Hear, my son, and receive my sayings, and the years of your life will be many. I have taught you in the way of wisdom; I have led you in right paths. When you walk, your steps will not be hindered, and when you run, you will not stumble. Take firm hold of instruction, do not let go; keep her, for she is your life" (Proverbs 4:1-13).

God gave you His book to teach you wisdom. It tells you how to pick a good spouse. It is sad that so many don't find that good enough. They insist that God speaks to them directly, but in doing so they are refusing to be responsible for the decisions they make in their lives. God has given you your intelligence. He gave you instructions concerning life. The real question is whether you will pay attention to it or not.

How do you know if this is a man you should marry? Does he display the traits of a good husband, such as those listed in Ephesians 5:22-33? Are you and he showing the qualities of love as listed in I Corinthians 13:4-8? If nothing changed, would he be the man you want to walk beside for the rest of your life?

Quit relying on charlatans and start relying on God.

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