Preacher’s Kid
by Doy Moyer
I grew up a PK (preacher’s kid). This presents its own challenges for youth. The youngest of the children won’t think anything about it, but as we grow, we are often reminded that how we behave reflects on mom and dad, and … remember that dad is a preacher (the same goes for elders and deacons and their children). He’s the one in front of people giving instructions from Scripture regarding the home. He’s the one so many are coming to with their problems. If the PK doesn’t behave, that could signal problems in the preacher's home, impacting his influence and reputation.
Now, it is true that all children, no matter parental occupation, are reflections of their home. But the PK cannot hide in obscurity (I wanted to). Everyone knows us, and so many are watching, not necessarily because they are looking for something wrong but because it is natural to see those closest to the ones who lead the congregation. The preacher’s wife is seen; the preacher’s kids are seen. Whatever the reason, warranted or not, there is a certain kind of pressure in this.
The reaction to the pressure comes in many varieties. Some PKs are models of well-behaved children (not perfect, but they stay focused on doing what is right). Others jump to extremes and, in some cases, dive off the deep end into sin. They are embarrassed to say that their dad preaches. They hate the pressure that comes with that situation, so they bow out. And yes, it does hurt mom, dad, and their situation in working with the church.
But what we need to remember is that PKs (and EKs and DKs) are kids just like any other. They don’t need to be pressured more than others to behave. They need the love and attention that every child needs while growing up. Don’t place extra burdens on them that would not apply equally across the board. They need understanding, patience, and correction like any other. They need to know they are loved, not just by mom and dad, but by all within their circle.
Today, I am not embarrassed that my dad was a preacher. Even as I began to preach, no one was more supportive or helpful to me than Dad, who could offer the advice of one who spent a lifetime preaching. He wasn’t perfect, and neither am I. Today, I have children who grew up as PKs, and they have been blessings to us in ways that we cannot express.
Yet, PK or not, we are all children of the King of kings, and our responsibility to reciprocate the grace of God is the same for all. Treat the children of all well, and remember that causing little ones to stumble is egregious before our Lord (Matt 18:5-6). Let’s not elevate the work and value of some over others. Instead, let’s remember our true Father and aim to please Him in all we do.
