My husband and I live apart. Should I still have sex with him?
Question:
Hello,
I am concern about what can happen to me spiritually if I have sex with my husband who has committed adultery a number of times. He was once a Christian sold out for God and then, over time, he started not to care about being in right-standing with God as he should. We live apart currently because I believe he likes his freedom to do what he wants without me saying a word but sometimes he desires me sexually as do I him. I am mostly concern about what happens spiritually to me if I choose to lie with him, which has become increasingly difficult the longer we have been apart.
Answer:
The choice must be your own. I take it that you decided not to divorce him, so you are still husband and wife. Sex is supposed to take place in marriage (I Corinthians 7:2-5), but then so is the companionship, which you two are not accomplishing either.
What I would suggest doing is making up your mind. I would prefer you to work out your problems and reconcile. If he refuses to stop seeing other women, then end the marriage. But living half-way in between is not good for either of you because neither of you is truly honoring your marriage vows in your current state.
Question:
Thank you! I completely agree with you in regards to sex and companionship. So here I am doing all I can. However, my husband will make attempts to sleep with me like we are all good although nothing has changed, and I have avoided him. Oddly enough the last eight times he has tried, my "monthly" started out of nowhere. In that regard, I have kept myself, but in the event it does not appear, I want to know what's the best way to respond. Sex or no sex. I guess I partially can rely on my body to speak as it has been doing, but spiritually if I choose to sleep with him, do I pick up the spirits he has picked up? I do not know if he is sleeping with someone regularly, but I do know emotional infidelity is taking place, which hurts just as much.
Answer:
So you are wanting your husband to keep sex solely within your marriage while avoiding having sex with him in your marriage. "But because of immoralities, each man is to have his own wife, and each woman is to have her own husband. The husband must fulfill his duty to his wife, and likewise also the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does; and likewise also the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Stop depriving one another, except by agreement for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer, and come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control" (I Corinthians 7:2-5).
As I said before, you can't continue this half-way in-between type of existence. It won't work.
If your husband is continuing to commit adultery, sexually transmitted diseases should be a concern. People never picked up unclean spirits through physical contact -- besides the fact that the era of demon possession has passed as God said it would. See: