I decided to be baptized, but I’m not getting married for two years and we’re having sex. Can I ask for forgiveness after we get married?
Question:
I have decided I will be getting baptized this Sunday. I have been very conflicted lately because my fiance and I have decided to be intimate, but I know it is a sin before marriage. I keep having these thoughts that if I repent once we are married everything will be okay, but that means I will be purposefully sinning for two years. Will God forgive me?
Answer:
"Then Peter said to them, "Repent, and let every one of you be baptized in the name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins; and you shall receive the gift of the Holy Spirit" (Acts 2:38).
I really question whether you know that fornication is a sin since you have decided to remain in this sin until it is convenient for you to stop it. "Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God" (I Corinthians 6:9-10). This idea that you can enter a covenant with God while keeping your favorite sins is absolutely foreign to the teachings of God. You cannot become a part of His people, His church, His kingdom while remaining in sin. "What shall we say then? Shall we continue in sin that grace may abound? Certainly not! How shall we who died to sin live any longer in it? Or do you not know that as many of us as were baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into His death? Therefore we were buried with Him through baptism into death, that just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, even so we also should walk in newness of life" (Romans 6:1-4).
Notice that Peter said that people had to repent and be baptized. Repentance has to come first. You have to first change your mind about having sin in your life and change your behavior to reject sin from your life. Without repentance, then all you will be doing is getting wet because you haven't changed your heart.
"For if we sin willfully after we have received the knowledge of the truth, there no longer remains a sacrifice for sins, but a certain fearful expectation of judgment, and fiery indignation which will devour the adversaries" (Hebrews 10:26-27).
You need to be saved from your sins, which means you need to let them go. Tell your boyfriend that you are becoming a Christian and the Lord says that sex only comes after marriage, so you won't be having sex with him again until after he says "I do" in your wedding. Then tell him that you want him to become a real Christian too. But if you refuse to do this, don't make a mockery of Christianity by pretending to get baptized while remaining in your sins.
