I'm afraid of the amount of suffering I might have to go through when I die one day. I wish God would let me die in my sleep so I don't have to be sick with something like cancer. I have depression over my fears. How do I deal with this?
"So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own" (Matthew 6:34).
Like many people, you are fearing the unknown. You don't know what the future holds. You don't know when you will die, and you certainly don't know how you will die. Living in fear of the future is a waste of your time and ruins your present life.
However we pass from this earth, the time we have here is relatively short. If suffering occurs, it won't be that long before we leave this life. "For momentary, light affliction is producing for us an eternal weight of glory far beyond all comparison, while we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen; for the things which are seen are temporal, but the things which are not seen are eternal" (II Corinthians 4:17-18).