Can I be forgiven for fornication?
Question:
I am 21 years of age and recently got baptized. Before I got baptized, I was in a relationship for over five years and still am. A short while after my baptism, my boyfriend and I went to a wedding and then ended up having sexual relations. We both weren't in the right state of mind after the wedding having engaged in a couple of cups of wine during the reception. As soon as it happened, I felt horribly guilty. I never felt this awful in my life. I went to church the next day crying and praying, asking for forgiveness. I also spoke with my boyfriend, telling him it was wrong and must never ever happen again until we get married. I repented and even took on fasting to show God my commitment to Him and ask for forgiveness for my sin. I still feel terrible and want an honest answer on what I should do. And can I be forgiven or am I doomed to be condemned and go to Hell?
Please answer as soon as it is possible. Thank you.
Answer:
The only sin that is unforgiven is the sin that is not repented of. "The Lord is not slack concerning His promise, as some count slackness, but is longsuffering toward us, not willing that any should perish but that all should come to repentance" (II Peter 3:9). I'm baffled where people are getting the idea that sexual sin is different from any other sin. Especially since Paul stated specifically that sexual sins can be forgiven. "Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God. And such were some of you. But you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus and by the Spirit of our God" (I Corinthians 6:9-11). There were people in Corinth who had sin just as you did and were forgiven.
What do you do? The same as every other sinner -- you change. "For godly sorrow produces repentance leading to salvation, not to be regretted; but the sorrow of the world produces death. For observe this very thing, that you sorrowed in a godly manner: What diligence it produced in you, what clearing of yourselves, what indignation, what fear, what vehement desire, what zeal, what vindication! In all things you proved yourselves to be clear in this matter" (II Corinthians 7:10-11). Among those changes, you should realize that there is a reason God condemns the recreational use of alcohol. See Old Testament Beverages and New Testament Beverages.
Question:
I just assumed that where it says "you were washed" it means everything you did before baptizing is forgiven, how could I be washed again? I guess that's what I don't understand. And, yes, I agree I thought I could stay strong and not fall into temptation, I'm not using alcohol as an excuse because I am the one who committed the fornication regardless. I do not plan on ever drinking or being one on one with my boyfriend and he understands that and agrees with me.
My last question is it says in the Bible not to keep company with fornicators or even eat with them. If I repented and God forgave me my sin do I still count as a fornicator?
Answer:
If God expected Christians to live sinlessly, then no one would be saved. In writing to Christians, John said, "If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. If we say that we have not sinned, we make Him a liar, and His word is not in us. My little children, these things I write to you, so that you may not sin. And if anyone sins, we have an Advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous" (I John 1:8-2:1).
If you refused to repent of your sin, then yes, other Christians are told to shun you until you do repent. You repented of your sin. You had committed fornication but you are not currently a fornicator. The fornicator mentioned I Corinthians 5, whom the Corinthians were told to withdraw from, did repent and in a later letter, Paul said, "This punishment which was inflicted by the majority is sufficient for such a man, so that, on the contrary, you ought rather to forgive and comfort him, lest perhaps such a one be swallowed up with too much sorrow. Therefore I urge you to reaffirm your love to him" (II Corinthians 2:6-8). Christianity is about giving up sin, not condemning people in sin.
