How can Solomon say that having multiple sexual partners is bad when he had hundreds of wives?

Question:

You stated, "Solomon explains why having multiple sex partners is unhealthy by comparing sexual desire and intercourse to thirst and having a drink of water. 'Drink water from your own cistern, and running water from your own well. Should your fountains be dispersed abroad, streams of water in the streets? Let them be only your own, and not for strangers with you. Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice with the wife of your youth. As a loving deer and a graceful doe, let her breasts satisfy you at all times; And always be enraptured with her love. For why should you, my son, be enraptured by an immoral woman, and be embraced in the arms of a seductress?'"

Okay, didn't Solomon have hundreds of wives? And please don't tell me he had sex with only one of them. If he did, he would have sinned against the rest using your own argument.

I think it was easier for a man to have sex and marry back then when you could marry multiple partners. If you could afford another wife, well, the more the merrier ...

Maybe you're right. I couldn't imagine having more than one wife.

Anyhow, I wish you guys would pay more attention to the golden rule, "Love thy neighbor," than all the homophobic and "sex is sin" stuff.

Answer:

Your question is based on the answer given to another question: "Why is sex a sin?" In that response, it was stated, "sex is not a sin, but it can become a sin in certain situations." In general, sex is a sin when it takes place outside of a marriage covenant. (See the answer for all the pertinent details.)

I'm amused that you objected to my answering another person's legitimate question. But since you sent in your own question, I must assume that your true objection is not that the topic was discussed but that you did not like the answer. It appears that you are a practicing homosexual. I draw that conclusion because the cited article makes no mention of homosexuality, yet you felt compelled to "shoot the messenger" by stating that I am homophobic (afraid of homosexuals). In addition, you are looking to justify having multiple sexual partners; something that is popular among those practicing homosexuality.

My job as a preacher is to uphold and explain God's word. Since Peter stated, "If anyone speaks, let him speak as the oracles of God" (I Peter 4:11), I try very hard to limit giving my own opinion concerning matters that are asked. Bible verses are freely quoted to support the points being present, all so that God receives the glory for the sensibility of His teaching.

I have no fear of homosexuality (or fornication, or adultery, for that matter). God states that these actions are sins. "Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God" (I Corinthians 6:9-10). A sin is a sin. Homosexuality is no better nor worse than sins such as drunkenness, thievery, or extortion. As with any sin, it will keep you out of heaven, so it must be dealt with rather than ignored. Just because something happens to be your favorite sin, it doesn't mean people shouldn't talk about why it is wrong. It appears you have deceived yourself into thinking that God will overlook sexual sins. God has clearly stated otherwise.

However, you raise an interesting point about Solomon: "He had seven hundred wives, princesses, and three hundred concubines" (I Kings 11:3). How does a man with so many wives gain the right to tell us it is dangerous to have sex with multiple women outside of marriage?

First, we must note that the Bible is an interesting book. It doesn't dress up its heroes. Unlike the myths of other religions where the main characters can do no wrong, the Bible shows men as they are -- their righteous deeds as well as their sins. Abraham is a great example of faith, but the Bible mentions that he lied on two occasions. David was a man after God's own heart, but he committed adultery. Solomon was given great wisdom, but he acted foolishly in regard to his wives.<

The law of Moses gave special rules to kings, including "Neither shall he multiply wives for himself, lest his heart turn away; nor shall he greatly multiply silver and gold for himself" (Deuteronomy 17:17). Despite this warning, this is the very thing that happened to Solomon. "And he had seven hundred wives, princesses, and three hundred concubines; and his wives turned away his heart. For it was so, when Solomon was old, that his wives turned his heart after other gods; and his heart was not loyal to the LORD his God, as was the heart of his father David. For Solomon went after Ashtoreth the goddess of the Sidonians, and after Milcom the abomination of the Ammonites. Solomon did evil in the sight of the LORD, and did not fully follow the LORD, as did his father David" (I Kings 11:3-6).

Second, we need to note that the Bible doesn't claim to be the work of man, but of God. "For prophecy never came by the will of man, but holy men of God spoke as they were moved by the Holy Spirit" (II Peter 1:21). To prove this point, the Bible records an incident of a prophet who tried to issue a prophecy contrary to God's will (he was trying to earn some money). Though he tried numerous times, God kept putting His words in the prophet's mouth; the prophet could not speak what he desired. "They hired against you Balaam the son of Beor from Pethor of Mesopotamia, to curse you. Nevertheless the LORD your God would not listen to Balaam, but the LORD your God turned the curse into a blessing for you, because the LORD your God loves you" (Deuteronomy 23:4-5). Paul also speaks of this: "Now we have received, not the spirit of the world, but the Spirit who is from God, that we might know the things that have been freely given to us by God. These things we also speak, not in words which man's wisdom teaches but which the Holy Spirit teaches, comparing spiritual things with spiritual" (I Corinthians 2:12-13).

Therefore, the accuracy of what is record does not depend on the righteousness of the writer, but fact that the author was inspired (given the words of God) by God.

Finally, the point made by Solomon in Proverbs 5:15-20 is that danger comes in having sex with the immoral woman. "For why should you, my son, be enraptured by an immoral woman, and be embraced in the arms of a seductress?" (Proverbs 5:20). He was referring to sex outside of marriage. Solomon had far too many wives, but he was married to all of them. We can safely assume that his wives did not have sexual relationships with other men. The danger Solomon warns against is one that is well documented in our modern times. When you have sex with someone, you are exposed to all the germs that person has gained from every other sexual partner. An immoral woman would have had sex with many men. They, in turn, have had sex with many other people as well. Why would any sane man want to expose himself to so much filthy disease just to temporarily satisfy a physical desire? His point is that it makes as much sense as a thirsty man taking a drink from the sewers.

Homosexuals tend to have far more sexual partners than heterosexuals. Statistics show that the average life span of a homosexual is about 40% less than the average life of a heterosexual. The primary reason is that the exposure to so many diseases from multiple partners nearly halves a person's life span. You need to face the blunt truth of the matter. Homosexuality will kill you quicker than cigarette smoking. (The article "Homosexual Lifespan" gives details from numerous studies. A Canadian study, "Modeling the impact of HIV disease on mortality in gay and bisexual men" makes a similar point.)

A similar point could be made for non-monogamous heterosexuals. They also tend to die younger than their monogamous counterparts, though not as quickly as homosexuals because heterosexuals tend to have fewer partners during their lifetime.

So, does the golden rule to "love your neighbor as yourself" (Matthew 22:39) indicate that Christians ought to be silent about sinful and dangerous behavior? Actually, quite the opposite. "For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Walk as children of light (for the fruit of the Spirit is in all goodness, righteousness, and truth), finding out what is acceptable to the Lord. And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather expose them" (Ephesians 5:8-11). To love someone is to want the best for them. I would that everyone be able to enter heaven, but God has warned that sin will keep people out of his dwelling. Because of love for my neighbor, I sound the alarm regarding the dangers of sin so that those heeding the warning might leave the danger and be rescued. I hope you will be one of them.

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