If one is expected to wait for sex until marriage, where does God promise a husband?
I'm tired of waiting for 37 years. I just had to fend off a married, now divorced, minister. He is still in the pulpit. He was separated, which I understood was meant for restoration. We have nothing in place for restoration and the brotherhood has cut him off completely. I feel like a joke, and I am tired of having to say no. Help, if you think you can.
If you are expecting me to pass judgment on this minister, I can't. The only thing I can state is that he had no business pursuing a woman before his divorce went through. Depending on the reason for the divorce, it is possible he still has no business pursuing another woman. His "job" is to gain reconciliation with his former wife if that is possible. "Now to the married I command, yet not I but the Lord: A wife is not to depart from her husband. But even if she does depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. And a husband is not to divorce his wife" (I Corinthians 7:10-11).
What disturbs me is that you appear to want to accept this man's advances, knowing it is wrong, simply because you are tired of waiting. Perhaps that is the key to the problem. You are expecting God to drop off a husband at your doorstep instead of actively looking. There is no time limit on doing what is right. God has repeatedly stated that heaven is only for those who are able to run the race with endurance.
"And you, who once were alienated and enemies in your mind by wicked works, yet now He has reconciled in the body of His flesh through death, to present you holy, and blameless, and above reproach in His sight-- if indeed you continue in the faith, grounded and steadfast, and are not moved away from the hope of the gospel which you heard, which was preached to every creature under heaven, of which I, Paul, became a minister" (Colossians 1:21-23).
"Christ as a Son over His own house, whose house we are if we hold fast the confidence and the rejoicing of the hope firm to the end" (Hebrews 3:6).
"And we desire that each one of you show the same diligence to the full assurance of hope until the end" (Hebrew 6:11).
"Therefore we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. For consider Him who endured such hostility from sinners against Himself, lest you become weary and discouraged in your souls" (Hebrews 12:1-3).
"Be faithful until death, and I will give you the crown of life" (Revelation 2:10).
"And he who overcomes, and keeps My works until the end, to him I will give power over the nations" (Revelation 2:26).
There is no promise of a spouse. What is promised is eternal happiness for those who remain true until the end of life.