The Root of Bitterness

by Doy Moyer

“Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you” (Ephesians 4:31-32).

Photo by Zach Lezniewicz on Unsplash

Bitterness is poison. It destroys the one eaten up with it and hurts others in its path. The writer of Hebrews noted: “See to it that no one fails to obtain the grace of God; that no ‘root of bitterness’ springs up and causes trouble, and by it many become defiled” (Hebrews 12:15). The last phrase makes the point that many will become stained or contaminated by what bitterness does. It is a “root” that springs up and demolishes relationships. The writer may be echoing a point made in Deuteronomy 29:18-19. Moses warned the people about turning away from God’s covenant. He says, “Beware lest there be among you a root bearing poisonous and bitter fruit, one who, when he hears the words of this sworn covenant, blesses himself in his heart, saying, ‘I shall be safe, though I walk in the stubbornness of my heart.’ This will lead to the sweeping away of moist and dry alike.” This is the root of bitterness, a poisonous and bitter fruit indeed. It runs counter to the fruit of the Spirit.

Paul ties bitterness to “anger and clamor and slander.” Bitterness grows through the anger and grudges that one holds. What one says and does with bitterness can also involve clamor (loud crying out) and slander toward others. The bitter person throws fits when he doesn’t get his way, and others become the targets of the rage. In turn, it devolves into malice (evil, ill-will, and desire to injure). This is about as destructive as one can get, and bitterness is the poisonous root of it all. Paul tells God’s people that these must be “put away from you.” They will eat away the holiness of God’s people.

Think of a couple of examples given in Genesis of how bitterness can be so harmful to those who hold the grudges. Since the Hebrews writer mentions Esau in the context of speaking about bitterness, we note that Esau’s anger toward Jacob’s maneuvering to get both Esau’s birthright and firstborn blessing led to Esau’s desire to kill Jacob. “As soon as Esau heard the words of his father, he cried out with an exceedingly great and bitter cry and said to his father, ‘Bless me, even me also, O my father!’” (Genesis 27:34) Later, we read, “Now Esau hated Jacob because of the blessing with which his father had blessed him, and Esau said to himself, ‘The days of mourning for my father are approaching; then I will kill my brother Jacob’” (Genesis 27:41). The bitterness consumed him, and how many years of his life were ruined because of it?

Consider also the situation between Joseph and his brothers. Because their father loved Joseph more than they, the brothers reached a point where “they hated him (Joseph) and could not speak peacefully to him” (Genesis 37:4). Hatred and bitterness make it impossible to speak peaceful and kind words. Our words will be laced with the poison of bitterness and lead us to insult, cast aspersions, and slander. We may not even realize we are doing it.

Social media seems to be a breeding ground for bitter and angry interactions. Sometimes, people, typically known as trolls and occasionally anonymous, purposefully respond to posts with offensive and angry rejoinders. Yet they are not all anonymous, and sometimes, those among friends also reply with angry retorts instead of calm, peaceful attempts at reasonable discussion. However, such interactions are out of place for the child of God, whether online or face-to-face. We must do better in seeking peace and having reasonable discussions.

In contrast to the bitterness, Paul writes that God’s people are to be kind, tenderhearted, and forgiving. Kindness is a mark of love and is listed as a fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22). Instead of being mean, insulting, and ungracious, we seek to show grace, mercy, and kindness in how we interact and converse with others even when they do not show these in return. To be tenderhearted is to show compassion, to be moved by another’s situation. Forgiveness should also be a staple of the Christian’s desires and attitudes.

Paul said, “forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” Our forgiveness of others is so important that our own forgiveness hinges on it: “For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses” (Matthew 6:14-15; cf. Mark 11:25).

The contrast here should be plain. “Bitter jealousy and selfish ambition” are in line with the wisdom of this world and lead to disorder and vile practices. In contrast, the wisdom of God is “first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere” (James 3:13-18). May God help us overcome bitterness and act with kindness and peace. May we show God’s wisdom in a world of bitterness and anger!