My wife had a proxy marriage when she was young. Does that mean we cannot be married?
Question:
Hello,
I have been married to my wonderful wife for a number of years. We have a beautiful family! Before I met my wife she was in a proxy marriage. This proxy marriage was done so she could gain citizenship. She was a illegal citizen at the time. The young man she did the proxy marriage with was incarcerated at the time. Because of this her mother stood in at a lawyer's office in place of the groom. Her mother and herself exchanged wedding vows. The individual never was physically present. They never lived together as a married couple. The Immigration Department rejected the proxy marriage, and she still could not obtain citizenship. Years later she is now a Christian wife and I am a Christian husband. We are raising our kids in a church of Christ, but we never knew about the proxy marriage stance with Scripture. We spoke with other ministers, and they stated that it didn't count as marriage. Is this true? One last thing: she couldn't obtain citizenship with the proxy marriage but still had to pay for an actual divorce.
Answer:
I'm wondering how many preachers you will ask before you finally believe one of us.
It wasn't a legitimate marriage. There were no witnesses to his vows because he never made them in presence of those at the so-called wedding. One person cannot stand in for another person in making a covenant. See:
Even though the state recognized proxy marriages at that time, its rules don't make a legitimate marriage according to God's laws. Your wife had to get a divorce to meet the state's laws. It had nothing to do with God's laws.
For Christians, God's laws always exceed government laws. This is why states that grant homosexual marriages are not legitimate to Christians. The government's laws in that case break God's laws. The same is true in a proxy marriage. While they might have good intentions, it does not meet the criteria of a marriage covenant found in God's laws.
Response:
Brother Hamilton,
Thank you very much! I am extremely happy that God's laws are above all. You have really clarified this situation for me using God's words.
You are very knowledgeable and I enjoy your website. Your Q&As are exceptional and every time I need clarification I first ask God to help with opening my heart to understand and then I visit your website.
