I just committed fornication, again

Question:

Good morning minister,

At this very moment, as I am writing you, I've just committed fornication. I have sinned greatly. My eyes are full of tears. I'm ashamed to even ask God for His forgiveness again. I am struggling with this sinful act. I'm a Christian.  I pray. I read my Bible. But because of feeling so lonely, I tend to keep giving into fornication.  I love God with all of my heart. I just want to serve Him. The thought of always struggling with this problem has me depressed. I'm thinking the only cure is for God to take my life to avoid any future sin. I am a single Christian. I feel so unworthy to call upon Him. I just need advice.

Answer:

The problem is that you are using sex as a substitute for a relationship. Even though you commit fornication, you remain lonely. Yet, you tell yourself that because some girl let you into her bed for the night that you aren't lonely -- up until the morning comes.

There are many reasons why God tells us not to sin. Sin never really gives us what we want. What it offers is a cheap substitute that keeps us coming back for more in hopes of getting the real thing the next time. As Moses told Israel, "And now, Israel, what does the LORD your God require of you, but to fear the LORD your God, to walk in all His ways and to love Him, to serve the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul, and to keep the commandments of the LORD and His statutes which I command you today for your good?" (Deuteronomy 10:12-13). And as John told us, "By this we know that we love the children of God, when we love God and keep His commandments. For this is the love of God, that we keep His commandments. And His commandments are not burdensome" (I John 5:2-3).

You cannot be a true Christian and remain in sin. "Adulterers and adulteresses! Do you not know that friendship with the world is enmity with God? Whoever therefore wants to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God. Or do you think that the Scripture says in vain, "The Spirit who dwells in us yearns jealously"? But He gives more grace. Therefore He says: "God resists the proud, But gives grace to the humble." Therefore submit to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded. Lament and mourn and weep! Let your laughter be turned to mourning and your joy to gloom. Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and He will lift you up" (James 4:4-10).

Question:

I yearn for God. I really want to serve him in truth. I'm feeling a little guilty because I was asking God for something. Doubt always tends to cloud my mind. I know we shouldn't help God when He promised He will do for us, but I made that mistake and I doubted Him a little. I feel as if I'm being punished. I don't feel His presence anymore. Is it because I give into temptations and keep asking for his forgiveness every time I sin?

Answer:

Do you doubt God, or are you actually doubting yourself?

When you realize your sin, the sorrow for being wrong ought to drive you to change. "For godly sorrow produces repentance leading to salvation, not to be regretted; but the sorrow of the world produces death. For observe this very thing, that you sorrowed in a godly manner: What diligence it produced in you, what clearing of yourselves, what indignation, what fear, what vehement desire, what zeal, what vindication! In all things you proved yourselves to be clear in this matter" (II Corinthians 7:10-11). In addition, we have to be willing to admit to God that we were wrong. "If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness" (I John 1:9).

Feelings can warn, but they can never tell us where we stand with God. "He who trusts in his own heart is a fool, But whoever walks wisely will be delivered" (Proverbs 28:26). Feelings don't tell us whether God is with us, our knowledge that we are following God tells us where we stand. "Now by this we know that we know Him, if we keep His commandments. He who says, "I know Him," and does not keep His commandments, is a liar, and the truth is not in him. But whoever keeps His word, truly the love of God is perfected in him. By this we know that we are in Him. He who says he abides in Him ought himself also to walk just as He walked" (I John 2:3-6).

Asking for forgiveness when we sin is what God wants us to do. Not to clean up so we can go and sin again, but to honestly say we want to go toward God. To God, it doesn't matter how many times we need to do this, what is important is that we are working to leave sin behind. "Seek the LORD while He may be found, call upon Him while He is near. Let the wicked forsake his way, and the unrighteous man his thoughts; let him return to the LORD, and He will have mercy on him; and to our God, for He will abundantly pardon. "For My thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways My ways," says the LORD. "For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways, and My thoughts than your thoughts" (Isaiah 55:6-9).

Sins have consequences. Even when God forgives us of our sins, we usually still have to face the consequences of what we have caused by our sins.

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