I fell into fornication with a man I met a few weeks ago

Questions:

Hi,

I am glad I found your page and was led to report this situation to a true man of God. I rededicated my life back to God last year, and for almost two years, I have been single and waiting on God. Weeks ago, I met a man who really loves me, and I love him too, but we fell into the sin of fornication. We have agreed to stay away from each other and never spend time alone again.

However, I am an online minister and feel I should delegate and focus on God. I had to confess to a man of God, but I want to ask: do I also confess to one of the ministry members?

I will be expecting your response. Thank you.

Answer:

When you sinned, you sinned against God and yourself. "Flee immorality. Every other sin that a man commits is outside the body, but the immoral man sins against his own body" (I Corinthians 6:18). Forgiveness for sin comes from God, not man. "If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness" (I John 1:8). The confession spoken of in this verse is made in prayer to God. The only requirement for talking to other people is to get help with overcoming sin and to have someone else also praying for you. "Therefore, confess your sins to one another, and pray for one another so that you may be healed. The effective prayer of a righteous man can accomplish much. ... My brethren, if any among you strays from the truth and one turns him back, let him know that he who turns a sinner from the error of his way will save his soul from death and will cover a multitude of sins" (James 5:16,19-20).

You implied that you were involved in sin two years ago, and I must assume those sins included fornication. You decided to leave the world behind. I assume you also started an online work in an attempt to make up for your past. In other words, you were looking to earn God's favor, even though it doesn't work that way. I'm glad you want to help people, but do it because it is right and not in hopes of gaining something from it.

After two years, you let your guard down (I Corinthians 10:12). However, notice how shallow you are approaching the idea of finding a husband. After just a few weeks, you have decided you are deeply in love. Love takes time to grow. "I adjure you, O daughters of Jerusalem, by the gazelles or by the hinds of the field, that you do not arouse or awaken my love until she pleases" (Song of Solomon 2:7). In your rush to be in love, you allowed yourself to be seduced. You jumped into bed with a man you barely knew. It is good that you recognized your error, but your actions declare that you were following your lust while excusing it by calling it "love." You need to make changes in your approach to life. Serving God requires holiness. "As obedient children, do not be conformed to the former lusts which were yours in your ignorance, but like the Holy One who called you, be holy yourselves also in all your behavior; because it is written, 'You shall be holy, for I am holy.' If you address as Father the One who impartially judges according to each one's work, conduct yourselves in fear during the time of your stay on earth" (I Peter 1:14-17).

Response:

Dear Man of God,

Thank you so much for your response. I agree that I haven't known the man for so long. I know better now that I should always flee from such circumstances, which I began to do immediately. I also know quite well that I cannot earn anything from God by works but by grace. Once again, thank you so much. I will never let anything come between what I share with my Savior again.

With gratitude,