I don’t know if I should marry the man I’ve been living with for the last six years
Question:
I'm a divorced woman in my forties. I'm currently living with a man in his thirties whom I've been in a relationship with for six years. Of those six years, I was still married up until one year ago. During the entire time we were dating he asked me to get a divorce and marry him but I continued to say "no" until a year and a half ago.
But when I filed and received the divorce he began to make excuses - we should wait until we make enough money to have a large wedding; and we should not just rush in right after I've gotten the divorce, even down to saying that he is not ready to get married. After all this time now he doesn't want to get married.
I asked him to leave because I didn't want to live in sin anymore and want to live for the Lord. He then said he really wants to marry me and wants to live for God, also. But my problem is I don't believe him anymore, but I do love him and need his help - I'm disabled (cannot walk - may not have long to live) and have no family or friends and my insurance only pays for Home Health three times a week. He does take care of me and helps with the bills.
What should or can I do? I want to live right and not in sin. We are not having sex, but we do sleep in the same bed. Can you give me some biblical insight?
Answer:
You were committing adultery. You divorced because you wanted to marry the man you had been committing adultery with. According to Jesus, you do not have the right to another marriage. "And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery" (Matthew 19:9).
Sex or not, it isn't proper for two people of the opposite sex to be sharing a home, let alone a bed.
