How do we deal with our daughter who has decided to be a homosexual?

Question:

My daughter, who is in her thirties now, was baptized as a teenager to avoid being sent to a special educational school. I tried to talk her out of it but she said she was genuine!

Now, years later, she is living a life against God. She says she is gay and feels there is nothing wrong with it! She says she still wants to communicate with us, but we have made it clear we do not support her choices! When the Scriptures say to warn a heretic once or twice and then separate from them, does it mean no contact? No communication at all? I wrestle with love loving even our enemies and not speaking to my own child.

I probably should also mention that she has mental issues. She sees a counselor and a psychiatrist! My life with this child has been one challenge after another! Now that she is grown, there stills seems to be turmoil where she is concerned.

Answer:

You are mixing passages and coming to conclusions that cannot be supported by the Scriptures.

"Reject a factious man after a first and second warning, knowing that such a man is perverted and is sinning, being self-condemned" (Titus 3:10-11).

"Factious" means a person who causes division. When a person enters a church and causes arguments between brethren, he cannot be tolerated because the problems will only deepen. "There are six things which the LORD hates, Yes, seven which are an abomination to Him: ... And one who spreads strife among brothers" (Proverbs 6:16,19). Such a person is warned and if he doesn't heed the warning he is rejected by the church. Such a person will typically blame the brethren, but the problem belongs solely to him.

Titus 3:10-11 does not apply to your daughter.

"I wrote you in my letter not to associate with immoral people; I did not at all mean with the immoral people of this world, or with the covetous and swindlers, or with idolaters, for then you would have to go out of the world. But actually, I wrote to you not to associate with any so-called brother if he is an immoral person, or covetous, or an idolater, or a reviler, or a drunkard, or a swindler--not even to eat with such a one. For what have I to do with judging outsiders? Do you not judge those who are within the church? But those who are outside, God judges. Remove the wicked man from among yourselves" (I Corinthians 5:9-13).

Paul's point is that we are not to show approval for sin by having close ties with people who claim to be Christians but are blatantly living immorally. This doesn't mean you never talk to the person again; otherwise, how would you persuade the person to leave their sins? See Withdraw Yourselves. Basically, the fallen brother is treated as if he is just another non-Christian. You are polite but you withhold close associations -- like the neighbor down the street who you know but you don't invite to family gatherings.