How do I handle a daughter who chooses her boyfriend over her parents?
Question:
How do I best handle a 16-year-old daughter who chooses her 18-year-old boyfriend over her own flesh and blood? She threatened to run away from home if we didn't let her go to his Senior Prom. Her father and I told her she could go but not with our blessings and for her not to expect us to buy her anything for it. She accepted Christ when she was 8 years old and now is showing no respect for herself or her parents? What advice do you have for her heartbroken parents?
Answer:
Let me be clear that I am not a fan of modern dances, and proms in particular (see: "Shall We Dance?"). However, I suspect I see the root of the contention. I cannot find a single reason why you don't want her going out with this particular boy. Instead, you give me and likely gave her as well, meaningless, emotional appeals. How is she supposed to respect something that isn't respectable? In addition, you state that you gave her permission to go, but now that she is going, you are upset with her for doing what you gave her permission to do. The word for saying one thing but meaning another is hypocrisy. You are not giving her a consistent message and are then upset that she isn't understanding what you are not saying.
