Did God curse us for having sex before marriage?



I have a question,

I had a girlfriend before marriage and we had sex. I married the same girl with whom I had sex. Will it be considered as fornication, adultery, or sin in God's eyes? I and my wife know we both are guilty of what happened before marriage. We agree that we shouldn't have done this. But whenever there is a small fight in our house, we feel that God is cursing us for what we have done.


"Now the sons of Jacob came in from the field when they heard it; and the men were grieved, and they were very angry because he had done a disgraceful thing in Israel by lying with Jacob's daughter, for such a thing ought not to be done" (Genesis 34:7).

Even though Shechem wanted to marry Dinah after they had sex, his approach was completely wrong. Sex is only to come after marriage. "Marriage is to be held in honor among all, and the marriage bed is to be undefiled; for fornicators and adulterers God will judge" (Hebrews 13:4). Marriage doesn't erase the fact that sin occurred. It simply stops continued sin by removing the cause of sin.

God has instructed us as to how sin is removed. If you have not become a true child of God, then you are still carrying the burdens of your sin. It is distressing how many denominations do not teach the truth about how to becomes a Christian. See How to Become a Christian. In the process of becoming a Christian, your past sins are removed. If you are a Christian then you are required to repent of your sins, that is, you have to change both your behavior to stop sinning and the attitude that allowed you to sin (II Corinthians 7:10-11). You are also required to confess your sin to God (I John 1:9).

Sins always have consequences, but disagreements between you and your wife are not a direct result of your fornication. All couples have disagreements. One aspect of becoming one is learning how to solve disagreements. Don't blame your current problems on your past mistakes. Solve each problem as they arise.

Print Friendly, PDF & Email