Are thoughts of promises binding?
Question:
Good morning!
I have a question regarding OCD and false promises to God.
I have thoughts pop up (even intentionally about things I don't actually want to swear, I will do, like giving up on things) with a sentence like "If I ever use it" or "If I ever read about it again" with the consequence God knows (that He may not answer my prayers again if I break it). Today I deliberately had these thoughts, even though deep in my heart I don't want to swear such things. like if I ever pray in my mother tongue, or in English, or if I ever read about a topic I am interested in, or if I wear a specific fashion item I like. I have to mention they are mostly written mental imagery (not out loud) and in some cases, they were intentional just to get it done with for a specific number of times or to cover other things after it (like if I "swore" on something, let's do on this one too), only then to sometimes continue with a phrase that neutralizes the meaning of it (like "I don't want to swear", "you, say?" or a negative pronoun).
Last weekend, I made an actual, genuine promise out loud that I will never give up on anything I love unless I change my preferences.
Are the thoughts true promises to God, even if they are "half" intentional, and do I have to keep them and give up on those languages and hobbies? Can someone promise something on pain of God never receiving their prayers again?
Answer:
Like many people who suffer from OCD, you are trying to minimize your perceived risks by making promises. The fact that Jesus clearly states that Christians are to avoid vows doesn't occur to you. "But I say to you, make no oath at all, either by heaven, for it is the throne of God, or by the earth, for it is the footstool of His feet, or by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the Great King. Nor shall you make an oath by your head, for you cannot make one hair white or black. But let your statement be, 'Yes, yes' or 'No, no'; anything beyond these is of evil" (Matthew 5:34-37). Promises don't change whether you can or cannot do something. In reality, they are just empty assertions.
A second mistake you are making is thinking that God is more likely to look favorably on you if you give something up. "If you have died with Christ to the elementary principles of the world, why, as if you were living in the world, do you submit yourself to decrees, such as, 'Do not handle, do not taste, do not touch!' (which all refer to things destined to perish with use) --in accordance with the commandments and teachings of men? These are matters which have, to be sure, the appearance of wisdom in self-made religion and self-abasement and severe treatment of the body, but are of no value against fleshly indulgence" (Colossians 2:20-23). These sacrifices that you are making up don't change anything. They have no value. They don't even offer you comfort since, being man-made, they are frequently broken.
Finally, these promises are telling God what to do. Since when does the creation tell the Creator how He is to act? Moses tried that once and was reprimanded for it. "Then Moses returned to the LORD, and said, 'Alas, this people has committed a great sin, and they have made a god of gold for themselves. But now, if You will, forgive their sin--and if not, please blot me out from Your book which You have written!' The LORD said to Moses, 'Whoever has sinned against Me, I will blot him out of My book'" (Exodus 32:31-33). It wasn't up to Moses to decide whether he should be in God's book. It isn't up to you to decide whether God should punish you.
You are so focused on whether God is going to hold you to things that you made up in your head that you've lost sight of obeying what God has said. Get back to the basics. You know where you stand with God by your obedience to His commands (I John 2:3-6). You don't need to offer "extras" of your own making to impress God, because they will never impress Him.
Yes, you are being plagued by pop-up thoughts and impulses to do something more to make you feel more secure. Ignore them.
