Will God bring my boyfriend back to take responsibility for me and our soon-to-be-born child?
Question:
Good Afternoon,
I am a strong believer and was recently engaged to a believer for about a year and a half. We had an amazing relationship until things took a hard toll in our relationship when we lost our son at 7 months into pregnancy. Things began getting harder for us since we did not have the support of our families because we waited to get married until after the baby arrived. They expected us to be married before the baby's arrival. After our loss, I was told I could no longer have children since my body was too weak, and getting pregnant could actually harm me, so that took an even bigger toll on me. Due to lack of support and our weakness getting to us, we became abusive (shoving and verbally) to where we grew distant. That is when my fiance left me.
A week after he left I found out I was pregnant again with a miracle baby and have not had a chance to talk to him, since he has changed his number. It seems his family is against me and wants nothing to do with me. I keep praying for God to humble him and his family and erase all previous negative thoughts they have about me, but it seems things keep getting worse.
Does it really get worse before it gets better? Is it right for him and his family to abandon me if I'm pregnant carrying his child? Can this be saved in God's perfect timing?
Answer:
"Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God" (I Corinthians 6:9-10).
"What shall we say then? Shall we continue in sin that grace may abound? Certainly not! How shall we who died to sin live any longer in it?" (Romans 6:1-2).
"But why do you call Me 'Lord, Lord,' and do not do the things which I say?" (Luke 6:46).
I continue to be surprised that people can consider themselves to be strong Christians while blatantly sinning. You were having sex with a man while unmarried. That is fornication. Instead of being sorrowful over your sins, or heeding the warnings from your families, you figured you would live life your own way and imagine that God would be perfectly happy with your decisions.
I'm sorry you lost your child and your boyfriend. Since he will not return your calls, I would suggest that as a practical matter is to go to social services and let them know that he is the father. They will make sure that he takes ownership of what he has done such as supporting the child. Meanwhile, you need to decide what you are going to do. You seem to have your hopes pinned on his return, but that can't be guaranteed, so you need to make plans as if he might not return. If he does, you can't go back to your sins. You need God's help more than anything. That means you need to repent of sins -- changing your mind about them and changing your behavior -- and go back to living life God's way (II Corinthians 7:10-11). You also need to apologize to God for ignoring His instructions, which would have kept you out of this current predicament if you had only listened to Him (I John 1:9). I hope your boyfriend also finds his way back to God, but neither you nor I can make him do what is right. He has to make his own choice, just as you must make your choice.
