Why don’t my parents treat me as an adult?

Question:

I am planning to drive to a large city for a big lectureship at a congregation there. I have never driven in a large city. I am in my early twenties and still live in my parents' house because I don't have the money to rent an apartment. I am a recent college graduate. I have been praying that my parents will allow me to attend this lectureship. My parents still treat me like a child and won't accept the fact that I am an adult. They keep on ruling and planning my life. I cannot make my own decisions. My mother is unfaithful and my dad is not a Christian. There is not much I can do about it because discussing the Bible with them does no good.

What should I do if my parents tell me that I can't go to the lectureship? How should I respond to it? I am an adult.

Answer:

So when are you going to start accepting responsibility as an adult? If you own the car, you simply mention to your parents: I will be going over to such-and-such a place, staying at so-and-so house and I'll be back on such-and-such a date. There is no asking permission because you are an adult and there is no permission needed from your parents. If you don't own the car, then you ask if you might borrow their car for the trip. If the answer is no, you figure out another way to get there: rent a car, take a bus, or find someone else going the same way. Notice the permission you seek in such a case is not whether you go but whether you might borrow what is owned by another.

When you don't act as an adult, it shouldn't be surprising to find you aren't treated as an adult. You can make your own decisions, but first, you have to stop giving your decisions to other people. Why let a non-Christian and an unfaithful Christian make your choices for you?

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