What can I do about getting annoyed with people?

Question:

I have a problem with my attitude. I am a medical professional and I work in a very stressful environment. I choose this profession because I truly believed I wanted to help people to learn more about their medications.  I find myself getting frustrated and tend to sin when people come in with fake prescriptions or ask me a question I feel they should already know. I am a Christian and I know this is wrong but cannot help it when I am in these situations. Sometimes before I go to work I pray and ask God to help me with my attitude, but I find myself back in the same mode, getting frustrated with people and their ways.  I find myself feeling so guilty about my actions because others around me are not Christians, and I know that I should be an example to them. I feel bad when I hear my coworkers tell me "the customers say you are very rude." I have read in Isaiah 59 that God will not hear a sinner. I try my best to improve my attitude but it just seems like the devil is busy with me. Although I know it is not an excuse, I find myself getting more impatient the older I become. My main question is will God hear me if I go to him in private and confess my sin, or is this considered a public reproach against the church? Also, brother pray for me that I will have a better attitude.

Answer:

Of course, you have my prayers, but let's back up a bit and talk about the causes of your frustrations. It appears to me that at the root of your frustration is the annoyance that people don't behave as you think they ought. You have expectations of other people, which they are not meeting, and since you have no control over the matter it comes out as impatience and anger.

There are times when anger might be the appropriate response. For example, if someone comes in with a fake prescription, I assume that this is illegal. Either this person profits from selling the drugs or has an addiction problem (or both). It isn't your fault and there should be well-defined steps to take, such as turning the matter over to the police. Instead of being annoyed at the person for trying to pull a fast one on you, wouldn't it be better to feel sad that Satan has them tangled up in sin? What is better to see is that it has nothing really to do with you.

Now, in regards to not knowing what you think they ought to know there the problem is in your control. Your frustrations come from your expectations of other people. If you think about it a moment, it isn't fair to another person that they don't meet your expectations. Is it because they have a problem that makes it hard for them to retain information?

I have a close family member who had a stroke that took out his short-term memory. You wouldn't know it because he is active and involved in many things. But if he needs information, he has to ask five or six times to get the information locked into his memory. For him, writing things down helps because he can read the information multiple times. I have several friends, all members of the church, who are former druggies. They each have slight variations on problems stemming from their former days of drug abuse. One can't remember time. If you have something scheduled with him, you need to call in advance to remind him; otherwise, he literally can't remember or he might not remember what day of the week it happens to be. Another can't remember where he left things. He is constantly losing things. He'll come by and after his visit, he'll return numerous times to get various small items that he realized he left behind. All of these people are strong Christians and highly productive in both the church and in the secular world.

For me, none of these things are frustrating. It is a part of who these people are and I love them and their character quirks. See people as individuals with their own strengths and weaknesses. If someone isn't getting verbal instruction, ask if written instructions work better for them (or vice versa). Perhaps they learn better by seeing or doing it themselves. Sure, it takes a bit more of your time, but get to know the other person as a person and be willing to find solutions for them that work for their individual case. In this way, you manage your expectations instead of trying to manage other people.

Response:

Thank you so much brother, I’m starting to have a better outlook already. Again, thanks for the encouragement, and prayers.

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