Should I keep waiting for God to find me a husband?
Question:
I have questions regarding marriage:
My mom wants me to get married so badly, she even got me a fiance. Nevertheless, I am a Christian and I want to wait on the Lord for the right person He has for me. I am 25 years old. My mom just wants to have grandkids. She thinks I have a psychological problem because I am not dating, but I have been praying for the right man of God who loves prayer, the Spirit of God, and the presence of God. I have been praying a long time what should I do? Keep waiting or get married without God's will?
Answer:
Upon what passage of the Bible do you conclude that God picks a person's spouse? Where do you read that anyone is able to do anything contrary to God's will? "Indeed I have spoken it; I will also bring it to pass. I have purposed it; I will also do it" (Isaiah 46:11).
God has taught you how to pick a good spouse. The details are in His word. But He left the choosing up to each person. Some will pick well because they listened to God; others will pick poorly. Yes, God encourages people to get married. It is how He designed the world. But you are praying for the wrong thing. You are asking to be lazy and have God do all the work. You ought to be asking for wisdom in selecting a mate while you look. Instead, you are like the person who wants a job, prays to God for one, but then stays home and watches TV.
Have you noticed that while we pray for food, "Give us this day our daily bread" (Matthew 6:11), God also said, "If anyone will not work, neither shall he eat" (II Thessalonians 3:10). God expects us to match our actions to our words. We do as much as we can and let God handle what we can't.
If you want a spouse, then look for one and pray to God for help in your efforts. "He who finds a wife finds a good thing, and obtains favor from the LORD" (Proverbs 18:22). Notice that the person does his own looking and is blessed by God with a favorable result.
You have no fiance without your consent. You have no need to marry unless you agree. Therefore, the rest of what you say is just another way of you expressing laziness on your part. That you actually would even let your mom pick out a man for you and consider marrying him just because it means you don't have to look yourself is an extremely sad commentary on your character.
