Is there hope for me to overcome pornography?
Question:
I’m a Christian and a member of the church of Christ. I’ve been married for 20 years. For most of those years, I have struggled with pornography. Nobody knows this about me. I’m also a very weak Christian. Here’s how the cycle works for me: I watch porn, masturbate, feel guilty, pray for forgiveness, and then do it again a few days later. I give in to my flesh so easily. Sometimes I resist and go for a few weeks but then the cycle repeats itself. I am fully aware of what I’m doing and I know that it is so sinful, and I let it take over my mind and body. The bottom line is this though: I made the decision to look at it and then masturbate even though I know God always gives us a way out. I take full responsibility. I’m not giving up though, I have really examined my life these last few days and have had some very long prayer sessions with God about it. I am so ashamed of the way I am. I know it’s going to be a struggle to quit doing this, but I’ve already started. I am determined to stop doing this and turn my life around.
I’ve gotten so much help from your question-and-answer section over the years. I have a few questions for you. I am convicted and terrified by Hebrews 10:26. When I read the scripture plainly it scares me because ultimately when I look at pornography, I am choosing to do it willfully and it is a habitual sin. I’ve heard many people say that this scripture means if you keep sinning intentionally when you know it’s a sin, there is no hope for you anymore and you are doomed to Hell. So I ask you, will God forgive me if I repent and stop this terrible sin? Is there still hope for me? I really need some reassurance on this, I am struggling really bad, brother.
Answer:
Hebrews 10:26 should scare more people, but it is there to make you wake up to the danger, not to tell you that the situation is hopeless. If a person is determined to continue to sin, there can be no other expectation but hell in the end. Thus, the implication is that a person has to decide to stop sinning.
Addictive sins, such as pornography, are difficult to overcome, but they are not impossible. It takes a lot of self-discipline and a lot of falling down to get back up and try again. "For a righteous man falls seven times, and rises again, But the wicked stumble in time of calamity" (Proverbs 24:16). It helps a lot to have people in your life who help you. "Therefore, confess your sins to one another, and pray for one another so that you may be healed. The effective prayer of a righteous man can accomplish much" (James 5:16).
The first thing to break is the habit of looking at pornography. One aspect is to look at the situations when you give in and determine what is the underlying cause. Often it is stress or boredom, though it can simply be the need to ejaculate. It means finding better ways to handle the situations. Another aspect is making it harder to get ahold of pornography. Internet filters and various accountability programs help, though they are not perfect solutions. Having someone to talk to about the temptations and struggles is also a good tool.
Response:
Thank you so much for your reply. I know it’s going to be hard but I’m done with that lifestyle. I just want to strive to live for God and be obedient. Thank you so much for caring and taking the time to respond to me. You’ve helped me so much. I can’t tell you enough how much I appreciate you and what you do. I really would like to keep in touch with you.
Thanks again.
