If my wife divorces me and then marries again, does that free me to marry again?
Question:
I have always believed that man's written divorce means nothing to God. And you reinforce my thinking when you mention that God is the one who decides when the marriage covenant ends. Doesn't this mean that even though she wants a divorce (by man's laws), and I do not, that we are still married in God's eyes? And that if she remarries, she has now committed adultery against me, and this frees me from the marriage covenant.
I believe it is best that I remain single and be reconciled with her, but this is so she will not be in adultery.
I just feel that we are married in God's eyes regardless of what the law of man says. Why is a divorce recognized by men so important?
Thanks!
Answer:
God decides when a marriage covenant ends; that is, God is the only one who sets the rules and conditions for the ending of a covenant. There is no requirement that a person must divorce his spouse because of her sexual sins. God gives the option that if a person divorces over sexual sins on his spouse's part, he may choose to remarry. Again, it is not a requirement but an allowance. "And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery" (Matthew 19:9).
Since I don't know why she is divorcing you, I can't comment as to whether the two of you remain bound by your covenants. If it wasn't because of sexual sins on your part; yes, if she remarries she will be committing adultery. But, no, this does not give you the right to remarry. The Bible does mention divorces due to other reasons than sexual sins, and in those cases, both parties are to remain unmarried or be reconciled. "Now to the married I command, yet not I but the Lord: A wife is not to depart from her husband. But even if she does depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. And a husband is not to divorce his wife" (I Corinthians 7:10-11). Adultery after the fact does not then give freedom to remarry.
Christians abide by the laws of their government except when they conflict with God's laws. "Let every soul be subject to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and the authorities that exist are appointed by God. Therefore whoever resists the authority resists the ordinance of God, and those who resist will bring judgment on themselves" (Romans 13:1-2). In many places, the laws of man are more lenient than God's laws. We abide by man's laws (filing for divorce), but we realize that even though man's laws allow for remarriage after a divorce for any reason, God's laws do not. Therefore, God's laws take higher precedence.
