I was impressed, at first, by your openness to address sexual issues, until I saw some of your answers

Question:

When I first visited your web site, I was surprised to see it was hosted by a church, as I was led there by a link of the Tanner stages. It was a pleasant surprise, and honestly, I let my guard down to my presumptions.

But then I looked at questions submitted by teens. Teenagers. These are kids we're talking about.

They're at the height of their sexual maturity, and things like "sexual whore" in a response are far from helpful. I was really disgusted by your responses, when my first impression was clearly so poorly created by the sight at sexual openness, just to be bashed.

Do you realize that Maslow, a real scientist, I know, crazy right(?), put sex, yes, sex, on the same level of the hierarchy of needs as food and sleep? Does that mean anything at all?

I understand the biblical stance, which while I understand, I find so deeply flawed and misleading, I have trouble not coming to tears when I realize who is afflicted.

No, I'm not an ignorant Christian hater. I was a strong believer for many years of my life. I thought that Jesus guy was rather cool. And I felt guilty about masturbation or doing the smallest things with girls. It was over years of really finding who I was that I realized I'm not about to feel guilty for something that is hurting nobody, as much as you'd hate to admit it, and that is something that humans do.

I pray that one day you can love God without so much hate in your heart. Humanity is what it is; and if you feel proud about tormenting young teens who turn to you for advice, I'd tell you to do something truly productive.

I'm proud to say I'm not a prude about sexual matters, and I am much better off informed. What's sad to me is that kids will actually read your advice, and continue to be so sheltered, and finally hit a point of rebellion, where they won't be anywhere near safe. This is far from your intention, but it's what will... Better yet, is happening.

Do you know that old saying "ignorance is bliss"? That's only true if the ignorance is a happier trail.

Answer:

I guess I'm surprised. You came to a church web site expecting to find support for sexual sins?

This is yet another complaint that I've received from someone in regards to the wording of my answers to questions people have submitted. I find it fascinating because the complaint is about something that doesn't appear in any answer. You see, I searched the site for the phrase "sexual whore" -- one I wouldn't use since it is redundant -- and as I suspected, it doesn't appear. So, I'm left to conclude that your complaint is similar to the one answered in "It's people like you who make young people fear to turn to God for help." You really haven't read the information on this web site. If you had, you wouldn't be making humorous charges that I've been keeping people in ignorance.

You are incorrect to state that teenagers are at the height of their sexual maturity. It is quite the opposite. They are at the beginning of their sexual awareness and it is because of this that they seek out someone whom they can trust to ask embarrassing questions and can expect a plain answer. There is a reason why young people correctly don't trust people who don't honor God first. Such people generally have other motivations than the safety and welfare of the questioner in mind. "Therefore God also gave them up to uncleanness, in the lusts of their hearts, to dishonor their bodies among themselves, who exchanged the truth of God for the lie, and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed forever. Amen" (Romans 1:24-25).

The real point of your letter is not the word selection of my responses. What appears to bother you is someone bluntly pointing out that "sexual freedom" is slavery. "Do you not know that to whom you present yourselves slaves to obey, you are that one's slaves whom you obey, whether of sin leading to death, or of obedience leading to righteousness?" (Romans 6:16). It bothers you that the arguments are sound with scriptural evidence backing it up and leaving you no room to justify your selected lifestyle.

True ignorance is promoted by people who refuse to acknowledge that there are other views than their own. They don't what to hear someone express evidence proving that some behaviors are both sinful and harmful. But the Bible proves that this is the way people have always been.

And no, I have no plans to stop answering questions people send me. Why should I deny a person help when it is asked? Even you found the information useful since you came to the site; as I point out to others, no one makes anyone go anywhere on the Internet. The reason people (about 4,000 per day at the moment) come is because of the information that is available.

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