I don’t know what to do about my life

Question:

I been having the same issue for a while now, which feels like forever. What do I do?

I am in my mid-twenties. I just got proposed to several months ago and I proposed to my husband recently. We wanted to share our love by sharing vows.

My family has had hatred against me ever since my youngest sister got engaged. My mom makes up problems about what my father did, and constantly mouths off about how horrible of a husband he had been to her for years, and always makes me watch shows of women who have been beaten up by pimps. But regardless, she just has no real love for me or cares for me as her daughter. She doesn't know my soon-to-be legal husband proposed to me by email and that I proposed to him by email as well.

My husband said the first proposal failed due to me not going to be with him. What is God trying to teach me? I read several of your articles, and listened to the podcast Every Christian is Necessary? But I'm lost on what to do. My sisters don't like me and use me for my English skills to spell, edit, and correct forms for them. What do I do? My husband has been wanting me to move in with him and end this foolishness, but I am really scared to leave home. I have no job. My husband will teach me martial arts for money. But I don't know what to do, my cellphone got taken away, I have no address.

What do I do, Jeff?

Answer:

It would be best to start with being honest. If you have not exchanged marriage vows with a man, then you are not married. "Yet she is your companion and your wife by covenant" (Malachi 2:14). You might have a boyfriend, but you don't have a husband.

You don't move in with a man before marriage, it is after marriage that you live together. And marriage does require that you leave your parents. "Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh" (Genesis 2:24). If this man claims he will only marry you after you move in with him, then you have the wrong man. "Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge" (Hebrews 13:4). But if you do properly marry this man, refusing to live with your husband is also wrong.

To act as if you have no control over your life is also dishonest. You are an adult, act like it.

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