Forgiveness Without Repentance?

by Mike Johnson
via Seeking Things Above

The Bible emphasizes the importance of forgiving those who sin against us. In fact, failing to do so is very frightening because, in Matthew 6:14-15, Jesus taught, “For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.” Further, He taught in Mark 11:25-26, “And whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him, that your Father in heaven may also forgive you your trespasses. But if you do not forgive, neither will your Father in heaven forgive your trespasses.” (Note also Matthew 6:12; Colossians 3:13.) If we want to be forgiven by God, we must be willing to forgive others. A 17th-century poet, George Herbert, aptly wrote, “He that cannot forgive others breaks the bridge over which he must pass himself; for every man has need to be forgiven.”

But what if the person who sins against us does not repent? Consider the following scenario. Mary and Sally, both Christians, are friends, but Sally sins against Mary by saying things to others about her that are both hurtful and untrue. Mary approaches her with love and concern about what she is doing. Although Sally has clearly sinned, she refuses to acknowledge her sins and does not repent. What should Mary do? Should she say to Sally, “The Bible tells us to forgive, so even though you have not repented, I forgive you.” Or should she not forgive her until she repents? We will examine various verses and biblical principles to try and answer this question.

There are many Biblical questions someone may ask us, which can be quickly answered by turning to a passage and telling the inquirer to read it and then say, “This answers your question.” The question of whether people should forgive those who sin against them, even though they do not repent, is also easily answered from one verse. Luke 17:3 says, “Take heed to yourselves. If your brother sins against you, rebuke him; and if he repents, forgive him." Luke 17:4 continues, “And if he sins against you seven times in a day, and seven times in a day returns to you, saying, ‘I repent,’ you shall forgive him.” These verses add a condition for forgiveness: repentance. So, if people sin against us, must they repent before we can forgive them? The passage says we should not.

Consider now a closer look at Luke 17:3-4. Several imperatives exist in these verses. He begins by saying, “Take heed to yourselves.” (The NASB says, “Be on your guard!”) In Luke 17:1-2, after Jesus speaks of the seriousness of causing someone to sin, He then speaks of the need to be careful about being unwilling to forgive someone who sins against you. These two verses have three “if/then” type statements. First, if a brother sins against you, then “rebuke him.” The Greek word translated as “rebuke” by the NKJV, and most other translations, involve telling the offending brother that he is wrong. (Note also II Timothy 4:2.) Next, if he repents, we should forgive him. Thus, we must forgive the brother who sins against us, but he states a condition: “if he repents.” The third imperative is in Luke 17:4, where He says that not only are we to forgive someone who sins against us, but we are to do so even seven times in a day if the person repents.

Matthew 18:15-17 expands on the previous verses in Luke. It says: "Moreover if your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he hears you, you have gained your brother. But if he will not hear, take with you one or two more, that ‘by the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established.’ And if he refuses to hear them, tell it to the church. But if he refuses even to listen to the church, let him be to you like a heathen and a tax collector."

In these verses, “tell him his fault” and “if he hears you” are equivalent to “rebuke Him” and “if he repents” in Luke 17. Both passages address a situation of a Christian sinning against another Christian, and in both cases, the one who sins must repent before the one sinned against is to forgive.

In Luke 17, the process is:

1. The brother sins against you.
2. You rebuke him.
3. If he repents, forgive him.

In Matthew 18:15-17 it is:

1. A brother sins against you.
2. You go by yourself and “tell him his fault.”
3. If he does not hear you, take one or two more with you.
4. If he still does not repent, then tell it to the church.
5. If he does not hear the church, then treat him like a “heathen and a tax collector.”
6. Anywhere in the process, if he does “hear you” (or repents), then you forgive him, and you have “gained your brother.”

The process mentioned above is to get the one who sinned to repent. If the person does not repent, the church must take further action at some point, as described in the Scriptures (I Corinthians 5:1-8). This action is done so an impenitent person’s “spirit may be saved in the day of the Lord Jesus” (I Corinthians 5:5). In the example, if Sally doesn’t repent and Mary tells Sally she forgives her anyway and then forgets about it, she is doing Sally, who desperately needs to repent to be forgiven, a great disservice. Also, if we are to forgive those who will not repent, what is even the point of Matthew 18:15-17?

Ephesians 4:32 says, “And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.” Thus, Christians are to forgive one another. But how are we to do this? We forgive the same way God forgives us; God has always required repentance before forgiveness. Consider various passages that emphasize this point. During His ministry, Jesus said, “I tell you, no; but unless you repent you will all likewise perish” (Luke 13:3). On the day of Pentecost, Peter told the Jews that they could be forgiven, but there were two conditions: repentance and baptism (Acts 2:38). In Acts 3:19, Peter told his audience that their sins would be blotted out, but they had to repent and be converted. Later, Peter told Simon, a Christian who sinned, to repent and pray for forgiveness (Acts 8:22). Thus, we see repentance as a requirement by God, and we see the concept of certain conditions needing to be met before forgiveness. Therefore, we must forgive others as God forgives us. (Ephesians 4:32). God requires repentance, and so must we.

Some may say that not forgiving those who sin against us unless repentance occurs does not “feel right” and shows a lack of love and compassion. They look at people who would take this position as holding a grudge against the one who had sinned against them. If this attitude were to exist, it would violate God’s Word. In Ephesians 4:31, just before making the statement about forgiveness, he says, "all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and 'evil speaking' and malice must be put away." Instead, he points out, we are to be kind and tenderhearted to one another. In Matthew 5:44, Jesus taught, “But I say to you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you.” Complying with the condition stated in Luke 17:3 (“if he repents”) does not allow us to hold grudges and ignore other plain passages about love and kindness toward those who sin against us. (Note also Romans 12:17-21.)

Some quote the words of Jesus in Luke 23:24 when He was on the cross. The passage says, “Then Jesus said, ‘Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they do’ . . . .” It is contended that Jesus, from the cross, is forgiving his murderers without their repentance. (By the way, it can be argued that the first part of this verse is missing in some of the early manuscripts and should not be in the text. However, we will assume its authenticity for the sake of argument.)

Does Jesus’ statement on the cross mean we can forgive people today who sin against us even though they do not repent? First, consider Christ’s earlier statement about the need for repentance to avoid perishing (Luke 17:3). Next, consider what Peter said a short time later, preaching to the Jews who had gathered on Pentecost. He preached a sermon about Jesus being the son of God and accused them of having crucified Him (Acts 2:22-36 ). They were “cut to the heart” (Acts 2:37) by what Peter said and asked what they should do. Peter told them they needed to repent and be baptized for the remission of sins (Acts 2:38). Did these people need to do this to be forgiven for what they did earlier? Did not Jesus, on the cross, ask God to forgive them? Could they not have told Peter, “We have already received forgiveness for having killed the Son of God; didn’t you hear what Jesus said earlier on the cross? Although Jesus previously said, “Father, forgive them,” they still had their sins because they had not complied with the conditions of God’s forgiveness. Jesus did not mean they were forgiven without repentance, but instead, He exhibited a forgiving heart while on the cross. Jesus was willing to forgive. He had a forgiving spirit, but the people responsible for killing Him still had to do their part: they had to repent and be baptized (Acts 2:37-38).

Stephen, later being stoned to death, exhibited this same forgiving attitude, saying, “Lord, do not charge them with this sin” (Acts 7:60). Among those present at Stephen’s death was Paul (Acts 7:58; 8:1-3). Was he forgiven, along with everyone else involved in the execution, right then? No, he was forgiven of this sin and all others, when later, as a penitent believer, he became a Christian (Acts 9:1-19; 22:1-21). In Acts 22:16, he was told, “And now why are you waiting? Arise and be baptized, and wash away your sins, calling on the name of the Lord.” (Note also II Timothy 4:14-15.)

How do we reconcile passages like Mark 11:25-26, which says nothing about the need to repent by the one who sins against us, with Luke 17:3-4, which states the need for repentance in that situation? Many passages teach that we are to forgive those who sin against us, but these verses must be understood in light of the condition stated in Luke 17:3 and biblical teaching elsewhere. As with any Bible question, we must take everything the Bible says on a subject. Thus, when a Christian sins against us, we do not pretend that the situation does not exist. We work to resolve the problem (without vengeance) because of our love for Jesus (John 14:15) and for the person who has sinned. We want the person to repent and to be saved eternally.