Can a narcissist make it to heaven after they die? I read that they lack the empathy and love that God expects from us. It’s also proven to be a mental illness for which there is no cure, therefore no true repentance can take place. But God says all sins are forgiven except for the blasphemy of the Holy Ghost. It does not seem fair that a person with a mental illness, such as narcissism, be thrown in hell over a disorder they can’t control.
We often see psychology as a well-defined science, but it is not. It is a series of observations regarding trends and probable outcomes. Because of this, there are no absolute answers in this field.
A narcissist is described as a person with an unreasonably high sense of their own importance. They seek out attention and the admiration of others. Because they are so focused on themselves, they have no empathy for other people. They get very upset when anything or anyone disproves their importance. ["Narcissistic personality disorder", Mayo Clinic].
Thus, the next question is whether narcissism is a genetic disorder or a learned trait. It has been noted that narcissists tend to have other family members who are also narcissists, but this doesn't separate learned behaviors from instinctive ones. It is also noted that narcissists tend to have parents who are either overprotective or neglectful. Both bad parenting styles raise children who have no self-discipline. They are never told "no" and always do as they please. They rarely face consequences for their actions.
The psychological literature does not say that narcissism is untreatable, only that it is very difficult to treat with current practices. The primary reason given for failure is that the narcissist is unwilling to change.
Unlike psychology, biblical teachings approach problems from a moral aspect. For some people, these teachings may be more difficult to implement than for other people but they are never impossible. The root teaching is that we are to love our neighbor as ourselves (Romans 13:9-10). A narcissist was never trained to love other people, but it doesn't mean he can't learn. "No temptation has overtaken you but such as is common to man; and God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will provide the way of escape also, so that you will be able to endure it" (I Corinthians 10:13).
Of course, learning requires that a person wants to change and this can be difficult for a person who never stops to consider that he is likely to be wrong. "For the sorrow that is according to the will of God produces a repentance without regret, leading to salvation, but the sorrow of the world produces death. For behold what earnestness this very thing, this godly sorrow, has produced in you: what vindication of yourselves, what indignation, what fear, what longing, what zeal, what avenging of wrong! In everything you demonstrated yourselves to be innocent in the matter" (II Corinthians 7:10-11). Repentance is critical for salvation. "I tell you, no, but unless you repent, you will all likewise perish" (Luke 13:3,5).
Thus, like every other sin, it comes down to a person deciding how much they regret being wrong and how badly they want to do what is right. God hasn't asked the impossible. It might be difficult, and it might not feel natural at first, but it is always doable.