Will my children go to hell because they turned against me?

Question:

My question is long, but I will try to shorten it. My husband died two years ago and my three kids turned against me and sued me for the whole estate. They lost in court, but I turned around and gave them each five acres of land. Two of my kids have not spoken to me since. My son says he has no mother, he never wants to see me, the daughter says she will talk to me on occasion but does not want a relationship, the oldest daughter is back in my life full swing. Does it mean that my other two are hell-bound for turning against their mother?

Answer:

"Then one from the crowd said to Him, "Teacher, tell my brother to divide the inheritance with me." But He said to him, "Man, who made Me a judge or an arbitrator over you?" And He said to them, "Take heed and beware of covetousness, for one's life does not consist in the abundance of the things he possesses"" (Luke 12:13-15).

I have no idea what happened or why your children are mad at you. For all I know, they are justified, but they equally could be in the wrong. The fact is that a child is to give honor to a parent. They owe respect, but they do not owe you obedience now that they are grown. When a child becomes an adult, he is to leave his parents home. "Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh" (Genesis 2:24). An adult is no longer tied to his mother's apron strings. An adult doesn't have to be involved in his mother's life in order to be respectful of her. But especially if a parent strays into sin, an adult (or child for that matter) does not have to tolerate sin just because the sinner is his parent. "The soul who sins shall die. The son shall not bear the guilt of the father, nor the father bear the guilt of the son. The righteousness of the righteous shall be upon himself, and the wickedness of the wicked shall be upon himself" (Ezekiel 18:20).

God does not arbitrarily support a parent. People will stand before God in judgment to give an account of what they have done in life. "For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, that each one may receive the things done in the body, according to what he has done, whether good or bad" (II Corinthians 5:10). The standard of judgment is God's word, not an individual's desires or hatred.

Rather than playing the role of a victim, if your children have things against you, then you ought to be resolving the issue. If you have sinned, then you need to get the sin out of your life. If they have sinned, then you ought to gentle talk with them about getting back on the right path. "And a servant of the Lord must not quarrel but be gentle to all, able to teach, patient, in humility correcting those who are in opposition, if God perhaps will grant them repentance, so that they may know the truth, and that they may come to their senses and escape the snare of the devil, having been taken captive by him to do his will" (II Timothy 2:24-26).

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