I’m afraid to convert
Question:
Good evening,
I hope you are doing well and staying healthy with your family. I found your website on the Internet while I was looking for advice from Q&A’s, and I read numerous articles of yours.
I am in a long-distance relationship with my boyfriend for over two years. We intend to marry each other when we’ll are in the same country.
I grew up in a non-spiritual household. I went to a private Christian middle school and high school but religion is something that I am afraid of. Whenever people asked me what religion I am, they always would go with a stereotypical answer and assume their thoughts as the answer, so I would just tell them that I am an atheist. I kept thinking this way, and now I don’t believe in salvation of any kind.
My boyfriend loves me and is only asking me to be a Christian so we could marry and have children. He explained to me that becoming Christian would allow me to go to heaven (if I pass the day of judgment). Our kids will know that I’ll be going to a better place when I am no longer alive. I understand his thoughts. I am not against Christianity since I went to services while in school. However, I just don’t understand why religion is needed.
I honestly don’t mind living as a Christian, going to church, and praying. I agree with most of your answers. The Christian perception of life helps put your thoughts into a clear mind so the sins do not affect your actions. But the hardest part for me is to say that I want to be a Christian. I believe that you can live by the morals of Christianity without being one.
I hope that you can help me on the right path. Thank you in advance for taking the time to reply to me.
Answer:
"And without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is and that He is a rewarder of those who seek Him" (Hebrews 11:6).
I get the impression that you see Christianity as a philosophical way of life. Those who follow Christ do have a way of life that they live, but that way is a consequence of their belief in God. You don't become a Christian by pretending to be something you are not.
You are correct that a person can be moral without being a Christian, but without a standard of morality that is greater than himself, that person will end up making compromises to suit his view at the moment. Without a standard, it is too easy to deviate. Without a belief that the standard comes from someone with authority over your life, it is too easy to ignore.
Don't misunderstand me. I would love for you to become a Christian, but I would rather see you change because you are convicted that it is the truth and not because you see it as a way to gain a husband.
Still, you used the word "afraid," and I don't understand how someone can be afraid of something she says she doesn't believe. Or is it that you are afraid to bind yourself to requirements that you don't really accept?
