I don’t know how I ended up sleeping with my lover’s friend
Question:
Alright, sir.
I slept with my lover's friend. Truth be told, I don't know how it happened because he bothered me before and I refused. I even told my man about him and actions were taken, but I don't know how I succumbed. Everything happened in a flash, and I'm wondering why, after refusing, all of sudden I agreed. I really don't know how everything happened. I'm really confused.
Answer:
If you don't know and you were there, the odds that I'm going to accurately explain what happened is not high. But there are a few things we need to discuss.
By calling your current boyfriend your "lover," you are implying that you are having sex with a man without being married. Fornication is a sin (Hebrews 13:4). Thus, you are not upset that you are violating God's law, but that you committed fornication with multiple men. But that is the nature of sin -- it tends to progress from bad to worse.
You mentioned that this second man had been trying to get you to have sex with him for a while. You trusted in your ability to say "no" to him, but you did nothing to stop seeing him. I would guess that you found the attention flattering, though unwanted. Eventually, he wore down your defenses. I would not be surprised to learn that alcohol or drugs were involved. I would not be surprised if you allowed sexual touching to go on. However it happened, at a weak moment, you gave in to the temptation. The real problem was thinking you were strong enough to defeat temptation instead of running from it.
Regardless, the true danger is that you are living a life that will not lead you to heaven (I Corinthians 6:9-10). Chasing after pleasure allowed bad things to happen and these will progress unless you make an effort to change. The solution is to submit to the laws of God.
