How can I get intimacy with God back after sinning?
Question:
I struggle with the belief that I can't be intimate with the Lord after sinning. I know that God forgives, but I struggle with believing that I can't be intimate with Him again.
An example would be there are two friends named Bob and Steve. Bob and Steve are really close. They talk to each other about everything, they spend time with each other, they laugh together, they hang out all the time. One day Bob steals money from Steve, and Steve finds out. Bob apologizes to Steve and gives Steve back his money. Steve forgives Bob, but at the same time, they are no longer close. They don't hang out as much, Bob is not as open with Steve, Bob doesn't trust Steve anymore. He may have forgiven Him, but the action of stealing the money affected the relationship. Bob and Steve were close before because they had a clean relationship.
That is how I struggle with things. I think that I may be forgiven, but emotional intimacy is no longer there because when you sin you no longer have a "clean" relationship. I have ruined the relationship with my sin and I am now seen as someone who has done wrong. I struggle with believing that I can no longer be close to God.
Answer:
Your logic fails because you equate God to men. In other words, your imagined god is nothing more than a human with superpowers.
God created humans but that does not mean God is like humans. Unlike men, God says exactly what He means and always keeps His word. "God is not a man, that He should lie, nor a son of man, that He should repent; Has He said, and will He not do it? Or has He spoken, and will He not make it good?" (Numbers 23:19). And unlike people, God grants true forgiveness.
"Let the wicked forsake his way and the unrighteous man his thoughts; and let him return to the LORD, and He will have compassion on him, and to our God, for He will abundantly pardon. 'For My thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways My ways,' declares the LORD. 'For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways and My thoughts than your thoughts'" (Isaiah 55:7-9).
God doesn't think like you and me, so your analogy of a relationship between two people cannot be applied to a man's relationship with God.
Rather than creating a god in your own image, read the writings of God (the Bible) and come to understand a little bit about your Creator and Judge. At some point, you have to decide to trust what God said and not attempt to override His message with your own feelings.
