Handling Rejection

by Terry Wane Benton

I suppose that we all feel rejection in one form or another. Even Jesus, the only perfect individual to ever live, was rejected. So, we have to expect it to handle it. It is sometimes very painful, especially when it makes no sense, and you know you have done nothing to deserve it. We have to expect a certain amount of rejection, and all you can do about it is handle how you respond to it. So, how do you handle rejection that makes no sense?

First, we must establish a value system (Matthew 22:37-40). God is our highest value. His opinion of us is the One that matters above all opinions. God made you because He values you. He does not make junk. There is nothing true about the opinions of people who do not seem to value you. You must know and believe that God is the only One who knows the truth. He values you more than the earth itself.

Your soul is so valuable to God that He gave His Son to prove how much He loves and values you. If God is “for us, who can be against us” (Romans 8:31f)? If you value human opinion more than God, you will be wrong, and you will be miserable. You must value what God values. He values you. People may not value you as they should, but God does. You can handle human rejection better when you value God’s truth far above misguided human opinion.

Secondly, people with the right principles value you. Not everyone has their principles in the right order. Some people are not guided by any principles at all except selfish desires. We cannot expect people who do not share God’s principles and your principles to value you as a person. But, people who share God’s principles will value you as a soul living forever with them in heaven. Those who do not look at you that way are not heading in the same direction. People who value God and the souls of mankind value you. Some pretend to value God, but they do not value what God values. They are simply mixed up in their values.

Those who cared for you growing up value you. People who know you value you and want what is good for you. These people should hold an elevated position in your heart. Those who do not value you do not deserve to occupy a highly influential position of power over your feelings. So, God and people with the right principles are the ones who value you. The rest are just ignorant. Do they know what you and God know? Are their opinions true, while God’s view is false? No! So, why do you give them the power to determine your peace and happiness? Is your peace and happiness dependent on people who have mixed up values? Or, is it dependent upon God, Who values you?

Remember that men rejected Jesus, and He cried out from the cross, “Father, forgive them for they know not (ignorance) what they do!” Jesus would have loved for them to accept Him, but He did not give them power over His heart to determine His own self-value. He held out hope and goodwill (love) for them, empowering Him to handle rejection. Can you love (have goodwill toward) them even if they remain ignorant and never come to value you? Sure you can! You hold the power of love and do not give them the power of ill will. You are made in God’s image, and you will love Jesus more when you suffer rejection. How? You will appreciate what He suffered even more when you suffer some of the same ignorance from others. Then you can say to God when someone does not seem to value you, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do!”

Remember, you must value them even if they remain too ignorant to value you. But, your joy and happiness are not tied up in them. It is in your relationship with the Lord, and there is a joy that no man can take from you. So, don’t give it up. Don’t give the wrong people, ignorant people, more power over your heart than God has. Make sure your values are realistic and in the proper order.