pop-up thoughts – La Vista Church of Christ

It seems impossible to perfectly control your thoughts!

Jeffrey Hamilton — Tue, 22 Nov 2022 15:45:00 +0000

Question:

I suffer from OCD, anxiety, and Asperger’s (on the autism spectrum), basically it’s a high-functioning autism. I have been struggling with this issue for years.

As soon as I read the verse about the unpardonable sin, I became obsessed with it. There have been times when this obsession is not as strong as it once was, but others when it’s all I can think about. I have struggled with trigger words for years. Simply put, any time I read “Satan," "devil," "demon," the number 6, "blasphemy," etc., I get intrusive, blasphemous thoughts. These send me on high alert because I think “Ok, I must not think about the statement that the Pharisees said. I must not think that statement at any cost”. This, as you can imagine, puts this statement at the front of my mind. My subconscious scans for it, and as you can imagine, sometimes it results in the thought happening against my true will. This even happens when I read holy things like “miracles," "Holy Spirit," etc.

Recently, I was reading something and the word “devil” was in it. Instantly, intrusive thoughts began flooding my mind. I was able to resist, but it did put me in panic mode. I went back to reading, but it kept getting worse. I sat the book down, and I remember closing my eyes and putting my head in my hands. I was trying to resist, and I thought if I didn’t give resisting my full attention, I would end up thinking it. This was a mistake. I remember having the thoughts “I know exactly what I’m doing” and then thinking almost exactly what the Pharisees said. It sent me into an instant panic.

It has been three months and I still can’t figure out how that happened. I have no idea. I’ve spent literal hours trying to figure out how that happens and nothing satisfies me. How could that happen when it is literally my biggest fear and the furthest thing from what I would ever want to do? This has just made the obsession 10 times worse, and I’m at the point where I feel awful going to church, reading scripture, and praying. It felt like that thought came from me and that I approved it for a split second, without being fully aware of what was happening.

I’ve read your article about this, but I’m still struggling. Jesus says whoever speaks (and as we know from the Sermon on the Mount, thinking is the same as speaking) a word against the Holy Spirit will never be forgiven. Simply put, I just don’t understand how I could not be guilty. Everyone says I’m overreacting about a wayward thought that was likely more intrusive than self-generated, but it felt so real. It felt self-generated. I feel so awful and like God is mad at me and won’t forgive me for that thought. I feel defeated because it's seemingly impossible to perfectly control your thoughts without ever having one that is against what you really want to think. It’s like when you tell yourself “don’t think this, no matter the cost”, you will inevitably end up thinking it yourself (as in not an intrusive thought, but because of them).

I feel so awful and have been on high alert for three months trying not to think about it. That’s made it way worse, and I’ve gone in and out of a numb depressive state. I struggle with seeing God as loving because, to me, it seems like He’s set a trap for people to easily condemn themselves with a wayward thought. It feels like His standard is perfection and the stress of trying to be perfect has the opposite effect. It’s like God has placed a trap for people to easily condemn themselves and that everyone with OCD has no chance of getting into heaven. We try not to think it, it's always on our mind, and then because of that, we end up thinking about it.

I had the thought the other day that God gave us OCD so that we would be hopelessly condemned and so that He could make an example out of us. Kind of like what Romans 9 says. It’s like there is a trap because it’s those who are most afraid and would never want to commit that sin that can’t stop thinking about it, and then eventually end up thinking about it. Is that why Revelations talks about the fearful being condemned first? To my knowledge, even scripture states that the law and trying to keep it brings death, yet Jesus lays down a law that is effectively impossible to keep. It seems so contradictory and confusing.

I don’t want to be feeling this way, but it seems like it lines up with Scripture. Have you ever known anyone who has been through what I am describing and made it out of the fear?

I’ve read your articles and I still feel this way. Please help me and give me everything you’ve got.

Answer:

“Do not be excessively righteous and do not be overly wise. Why should you ruin yourself? Do not be excessively wicked and do not be a fool. Why should you die before your time? It is good that you grasp one thing and also not let go of the other; for the one who fears God comes forth with both of them” (Ecclesiastes 7:16-18).

Your difficulty is coming about because you are setting stricter standards for yourself than what God expects of you. It appears that you are striving not only to avoid temptation but even the thought of being tempted. You have to remember that Jesus was tempted and was able to not sin. The simple fact is that all of us get tempted, which means that the thoughts of sinning cross everyone’s minds. The question before each of us is: what do we do with those thoughts? From what I can tell, you haven’t done anything wrong. “For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, so that each one may be recompensed for his deeds in the body, according to what he has done, whether good or bad” (II Corinthians 5:10).

Then there is the problem that you have redefined blasphemy from its true definition of lying about someone superior to you to other people in hopes of stopping others from following that person. That is what the Pharisees were doing to Jesus. They heard the crowd beginning to realize Jesus was the Messiah (Matthew 12:23), so they told a lie about Jesus to get people to turn against Jesus. They told the crowd that Jesus’ miracle was done by the power of Satan (Matthew 12:24). Jesus knew their motivations. He knew that they knew they were lying simply because they didn’t like Jesus, and so he warned them that they were reaching a point where their hearts would be so hardened that they would completely turn against God and not come back. It wasn’t what Jesus or the Father wanted for them, but it was what these Pharisees were choosing to do. Notice that you aren’t doing anything similar to what the Pharisees were doing.

Finally, you have a great ability to focus, but you focus on condemning yourself. What you need to focus on is where you are going. You need to focus on improving yourself. “The eye is the lamp of the body; so then if your eye is clear, your whole body will be full of light” (Matthew 6:22). Your eye represents what you focus your attention on. What you focus on tends to lead to what you choose to do. If you focus on righteousness, then you tend to live a righteous life. “Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things. The things you have learned and received and heard and seen in me, practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you” (Philippians 4:6-9).

Question:

Jeffrey,

I appreciate your swift reply.

For me, the hardest thing to understand is this: It feels like I did sin. The intrusive thoughts bombarded me and got so bad that I stopped everything I was doing to try and fight them. I can’t explain how (because it makes no sense to me whatsoever), but it was like I was so tense, trying to stop myself from thinking any blasphemous thought or repeating the ones that were being intrusively generated, then all of a sudden … bam. It just happened. It was like I yielded to the intrusive thoughts (temptation?) and ended up self-generating a blasphemous thought. It is as if I chose to think about it. I don’t understand how it happened at all. As I said, it’s like it just happened. Isn’t that yielding to temptation?

It felt so sudden and it’s like it happened before I could even fully comprehend what was going on. It was like I just automatically thought it, without any forethought or anything. The thought surprised me because I didn’t understand what happened. Still don’t. It’s like someone said. He had thoughts like “Sell him (Christ)” over and over. He would answer them by saying “no no no” over and over. Then one day he ended up thinking “let him go if he will”. He said it terrified him because it felt like his heart consented to the thought and it was self-generated. That’s almost exactly what happened to me; however, the thought that happened was almost exactly what the Pharisees were saying in Mark 3 and Matthew 12. Obviously, this other person didn’t commit the unpardonable sin because his thoughts weren’t anything like the Pharisees said in that passage, but that process is exactly how I felt. I’ve been under duress because of these thoughts for six years. I just don’t understand.

I know Jesus says that if you lust after a woman in your heart it’s the same as committing adultery. Wouldn’t the same apply to thoughts? If you think something blasphemous, isn’t it the same as committing blasphemy? I have such a hard time controlling my thoughts because of my disorder already. I just feel so confused. I understand your scriptural reference, but to me, that doesn’t seem overly religious. I’m trying to perfectly control my thoughts so that no bad thought about God ever happens.

I’m truly struggling to understand God at all. I don’t understand how a loving God could create someone, knowing they have a mental disorder like this and tell them to never think that certain statement. It’s like making someone walk a tightrope over hell with ankle weights. I guess technically it’s possible to make it to the other side, but it’s almost impossible. I just fear that God created people with this disorder to demonstrate his authority and power. It feels like he takes pleasure in setting a trap for them and then casting them into hell. I don’t understand it at all. I want to follow Christ, but I struggle to believe he loves me at all. I struggle to believe I didn’t commit that sin. Please tell me there is hope.

Answer:

"You have heard that it was said, 'You shall not commit adultery'; but I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart" (Matthew 5:27-28).

From Jesus' comments, it appears that the Jews were taking the Ten Commandments and narrowing their application. A man would claim that he committed no sin if he did not commit the actual act of adultery. However, Jesus pointed out that sin started long before when the man started lusting for sex with someone who was not his wife.

Lust is a strong desire to sin. It is a mental acceptance of sinful behavior where the person justifies sin in his thoughts. Jesus' point is that there little moral difference between doing a sinful act and wanting to sin. Paul gives a long list of sins prevalent in Greek society and points out at the end, "and although they know the ordinance of God, that those who practice such things are worthy of death, they not only do the same, but also give hearty approval to those who practice them" (Romans 1:32). The problem is the same. Doing sin is wrong but it is equally wrong to approve of others sinning -- and that would include you approving if you sinned.

You are dealing with intrusive thoughts. Such thoughts become stronger and more frequent the longer you dwell on them. Notice that throughout your note, you never state that you approve of blasphemy. You never make excuses for saying false things about God. Thus, there is no lust for this sin in you. The thoughts feel real to you because they are your thoughts. But that doesn't make you guilty of those thoughts.

Like many people who deal with intrusive pop-up thoughts, you find something that you are convinced is unforgivable and then condemn yourself as a hopeless victim. But the problem is that it is all born from your imagination; yet, you blame God for making things too hard when God never said you must never think of a sinful situation.

Jesus told the Pharisees that if they blasphemed the Holy Spirit they would be unable to repent and thus, God would not be able to forgive them of their sin. It is not that God is unwilling to forgive (II Peter 3:9), but people are required to repent before forgiveness can be granted. Blasphemy isn't a thought. Blasphemy is purposely telling other people lies about someone superior in order to convince people not to follow the superior person. The blasphemer knows he is lying but he doesn't care because he hates the superior person so much that he is willing to do anything to keep people from following him. When a person gets to that point and lies to others about the Holy Spirit, there isn't anything left to convince him to change. He will remain unrepentant of his sin, and thus, unforgiven.

You have been having bad thoughts about Jesus. You know they are bad thoughts and you don't accept them. You have no hatred for Jesus or God. You don't think you should make other people not follow Jesus. Thus, you are not committing blasphemy against Jesus and you are not even being tempted to blaspheme him. What you are condemning yourself for doing didn't happen.

Obviously, bad thoughts about God (or anyone else) aren't appropriate. You don't lust for them, though you are being tempted by the thoughts. Most people will take a random bad thought and tell themselves, "That wasn't appropriate." They might even utter a quick prayer for God's forgiveness, but immediately afterward, they drop the whole matter. This is where you are struggling. You refuse to let it go because you set an impossible task for yourself. "If we say that we have no sin, we are deceiving ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness" (I John 1:8-9). I try hard not to sin, but I realize that I will stumble at times. God told me that it will happen to me and everyone I know. What separates the righteous from the wicked is that the righteous don't accept remaining in sin. They make corrections, apologize for their weakness to God, and go on with life. They trust that God keeps His word and that they are forgiven. That is called "faith."

Therefore, stop blaming God that you are not as perfect as you think you should be. Focus on where you are going and not where you've been.

Question:

Jeffrey,

So what you’re saying is thinking a thought like that is a far cry from blasphemy? To me, it’s always seemed like Jesus basically said “What those Pharisees just said, that’s unforgivable. If you ever say or think those words, you’ve just committed an unforgivable blasphemy.” I’ve felt despaired because it felt like such an impossible task, especially because any time I saw anything like “demon, satan, 6” it would cause my brain to spiral out. There are even times when Holy things trigger these thoughts when I’m in Church, reading scripture, or praying. Sometimes, I’d end up thinking it in some way due to the act of trying not to think it. It felt impossible. What you’re saying is that what I think the standard is isn’t the standard that Jesus set. Correct? That God doesn’t expect me to keep that standard that I was just talking about? That’s why I struggle, I feel like God set a standard that is impossible to keep, and one crazy or random thought sends someone to Hell.

As I said, I can’t explain what happened, because I don’t know. It felt like I chose to think it and then was instantly like “Wait what?? How did that just happen!?” I’ve had intrusive thoughts and quickly discarded them because I knew they were automatic. This thought felt like I chose it briefly. Is what happened classified as an intrusive thought still? These thoughts have been here for years and I’ve always been afraid that inevitably they would cause me to think against what I really want. I’ve been so paranoid to the point that if I ever hear the name “Satan” or “Demon” I have to make some kind of sound or movement or have a counterthought to try and fight intrusive thoughts from coming in. I also always avoid the number 6 at all costs -- to the point of not counting that number when working out and such. I always reacted this way because I was afraid I’d end up thinking one because it was always in my mind. Basically, I’m so afraid of that sin that it’s always at least in the back of my mind.

I confess I struggle with my image of God because of this issue. I have a very difficult time seeing God in a loving way. Even when I read scripture, I always think “that no longer applies to me”. I feel hopeless and cut off from God.

I want to follow God more than anything, and I don’t genuinely want any of these thoughts. Never have. I just feel hopeless and rejected by God. I feel like Jesus is saying “Too late, you’ve crossed the line. It’s over for you” It scares me so much. If I don’t have God, I don’t have anything. I just feel so broken. I know we all sin and I don’t expect myself to ever be sinless. It just always seemed like that sin demanded perfection.

Thoughts or advice?

Thank you, I really appreciate your time.

Answer:

All the way through your note, you imposed rules on yourself without any scriptural justification. You then turn around a blame God for imposing rules on you that are impossible to keep. But these aren't God's rules. They are your own imaginary rules.

"To me, it’s always seemed like Jesus basically said 'What those Pharisees just said, that’s unforgivable. If you ever say or think those words, you’ve just committed an unforgivable blasphemy.'”
- You give no scriptural proof. What you imagine ("seemed") has nothing to do with reality.
- The Pharisees told people a lie (Mathew 12:24). Jesus knew their motivation or reason for telling these lies (Matthew 12:25). In other words, Jesus knew that the Pharisees didn't believe the lies they were telling others. That is why he warned them about blasphemy.
- You ignored that Jesus said, "any sin and blasphemy shall be forgiven people" (Matthew 12:31). There is only one that won't be forgiven and the implication is that it is because people committing that particular sin would refuse to repent of their sin.
You set up a task for yourself not to think certain words.
- You give no scriptural proof that God ever set that task on anyone.
- The words you listed are in the Bible. How can anyone read words and not think about them? Therefore, there is nothing wrong with those words. You made your life miserable. That is your fault and no one else, but you choose to blame God.
You claim to counter bad words or thoughts with sound or movement.
- Where do you find that in the Bible?
- Why would you believe that a sound or movement would do anything about a thought?
- Thus, you use useless things to fight against your made-up rules and then complain about being miserable.
You claim to know that God has cut you off.
- The Bible says, "For who among men knows the thoughts of a man except the spirit of the man which is in him? Even so the thoughts of God no one knows except the Spirit of God" (I Corinthians 2:11). The only way we know what God is thinking is because God told us in the Bible what His thoughts are on various matters. Since you have no scriptural proof for your position, you are again making up things to blame God.
- The Bible says, "The Lord is not slow about His promise, as some count slowness, but is patient toward you, not wishing for any to perish but for all to come to repentance" (II Peter 3:9). Your position contradicts what God actually said.

The choice is yours. Either you use your reasoning and sort out the real from the imaginary or you continue to make yourself miserable. No one can force you to make that choice.

Question:

Jeffrey,

Ok, so basically what you’re saying is that I’m putting a burden on myself that is impossible to keep and is not scripturally based. Correct? I don’t mean to be a burden, this is a very scary topic for me and it’s been something I’ve been obsessed with forever.

The basis for that sin involves the intent of the heart and not simply the words then, correct? As you said, that’s the impossible burden that I’ve shackled myself with -- never thinking of that specific phrase. I suppose it’s almost inevitable that if you try not to think something, you’ll always end up thinking it at some point.

In basic terms, simply thinking that statement doesn’t constitute blasphemy and certainly not an unforgivable blasphemy. Correct?

Again, sorry to be a bother. I struggle with OCD and intrusive thoughts, which makes this something difficult for me to work through. I don’t dare want to offend God. In fact, that’s the last thing I want to do.

Thanks for your time,

Answer:

“Therefore do not go on passing judgment before the time, but wait until the Lord comes who will both bring to light the things hidden in the darkness and disclose the motives of men's hearts; and then each man's praise will come to him from God” (I Corinthians 4:5).

“For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, so that each one may be recompensed for his deeds in the body, according to what he has done, whether good or bad” (II Corinthians 5:10).

We are judged based on what we have done and why we did those things.

Response:

Jeffrey,

I confess that I needed to step back and reason with myself. I understand what’s going on. I’ve placed an impossible standard on myself that Jesus never placed on us. I mean we don’t even know if the Pharisees really committed that sin or were close. They made the same accusation in Matthew 9, yet there is no mention of the unpardonable sin there.

“Never think this thought” means that there is always a part of my brain looking out for that thought. In time, the thought will reoccur and inevitably it would cross my mind. That’s almost unstoppable. That can’t be what Jesus meant because if it was there would be no hope for anyone. It wouldn’t make sense for Jesus to basically say “Here is a statement that will not be forgiven. Go forward and never think this statement ever”. If that’s how it works then the most devout saints would obsess over not thinking it only to all end up thinking it. That’s how our brains work. It’s like the white bear study. Basically, if you tell yourself “don’t think of a white bear or else” you’ll think of a white bear 9/10 times. Throw eternal fate into that and it’s too much pressure for anyone to handle.

Logically, I understand that. When I start to fall victim to fear and my disorders fire up is when I struggle.

I appreciate your time.

I compulsively want to make vows

Jeffrey Hamilton — Sun, 17 Oct 2021 20:44:59 +0000

Question:

Hello,

I have a question about vows. For a year or so, when I become concerned that something I'm doing or might do is sinful, I suddenly start to think a vow to God that I won't do that thing. This happens with no time to think about the vow, about whether I want to make it or whether it's worded in a way that won't cause difficulties I haven't thought of yet. Sometimes I stop myself before I finish the thought, but other times I can't because it happens very quickly.

I have experienced some vow thoughts that I think are just intrusive thoughts that I have because I feel afraid I'll make a vow, but others feel more intentional. I think I make them because I feel so worried about sinning that I vow not to do the thing I'm worried about so the worried feeling will go away. However, I do not really want to make these vows except maybe for the quarter of a second initial reaction where I want to stop feeling anxious. If I had a moment to think and didn't have my brain continuing to try to think the vow even when I try not to make it (which often happens), I would never agree to any of these things.

I want to stop making these vows because keeping them is making my life very difficult, but I literally cannot stop. I also need to know if I am required to keep them. I am heavily restricted in what I can eat and wear because of them, and I cannot imagine living the rest of my life this way.

Please let me know if you can help me.

Answer:

A vow is more than a mere thought about promising something. It is a commitment that is witnessed by others. Thus, what you are describing is a temptation to make unnecessary vows. You are correctly realizing that making such vows is wrong. "But I say to you, make no oath at all, either by heaven, for it is the throne of God, or by the earth, for it is the footstool of His feet, or by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the great king. Nor shall you make an oath by your head, for you cannot make one hair white or black. But let your statement be, 'Yes, yes' or 'No, no'; anything beyond these is of evil" (Matthew 5:34-37).

What you describe is a form of OCD. People suffering from OCD are trying to remove risks. I suspect that deep inside of you, you think that if you make a vow to God that this will make whatever you are facing to be certain. You worry about sinning so you imagine that if you vow to God not to sin, then you won't give in to the temptation. The problem is that such a vow is meaningless. God already commands us not to sin. A vow doesn't make a command more certain. In fact, when people do this, they are actually saying that God's commands are less important unless I promise to keep them -- then they are more important. Who then is in charge of your life and your decisions?

You can't stop temptation from happening. But you can continue to reject what you are being offered. Realize where the impulse is coming from and put your trust in God and not yourself.

Am I denying I sinned if I tell myself that I didn’t use profanity even though the words appear in my mind?

Jeffrey Hamilton — Tue, 27 Jul 2021 13:58:13 +0000

Question:

Hello,

I would like to ask a question. I was reading I John this morning and came to the verse where it says that if we say we have not sinned we make Him a liar and His word is not in us. I recognize that even though I have obeyed the gospel that I am still a sinner because I know I will never be perfect like Christ was. I try my best to confess my sins the moment I know I have committed one, although I feel I have a difficult time judging sin and temptation. For example, I pinched my finger on something and a thought of profanity popped up in my mind, although I didn’t say it because I know not to.

Anyway, the question that I have is that sometimes I’ll tell myself that at least I didn’t say any profanity. Am I saying that I have not sinned when I do this?

Answer:

"This is the message we have heard from Him and announce to you, that God is Light, and in Him there is no darkness at all. If we say that we have fellowship with Him and yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not practice the truth; but if we walk in the Light as He Himself is in the Light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus His Son cleanses us from all sin. If we say that we have no sin, we are deceiving ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. If we say that we have not sinned, we make Him a liar and His word is not in us" (I John 1:5-10).

John is talking about a denial of having sinned. He is not talking about a momentary ignoring of a problem. For instance, there are a few religious groups that think that once you've reached a certain level of holiness that you cannot sin. Such would be a lie. You also find many people who deny that passages that call certain behaviors sinful really apply or that they mean something else. In those cases, they are saying God didn't mean what He said; in other words, that He lied. None of these apply to your situation.

Thoughts of using profanity are temptations to sin. Being tempted is not a sin, though obviously, it can easily lead to sin. "But each one is tempted when he is carried away and enticed by his own lust. Then when lust has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and when sin is accomplished, it brings forth death" (James 1:14-15). When you strongly desire to sin to the point that you basically decided to sin at some point in the future, that is called "lust." Because you have accepted sin, lust is wrong, even though you haven't actually committed the sin. But in your case, you know that profanity is wrong, so when the thought popped up, you rejected it, which is the proper thing to do.

How do I battle temptation?

Jeffrey Hamilton — Tue, 05 Jan 2021 17:01:22 +0000

Question:

Good Day!

I have been a patron and a reader of your website for about a few months now, and I have found your answers to be good and your knowledge of the Bible is great. I have to say, your website has been a great deal of help to me, in which I say my thanks.

I am very young, to be exact I'm a high schooler. I have recently been reconnecting and talking with others in the Christian Community and now I put God and His Word into great focus. Now as I said, I am very young, therefore very easily tempted into sin and its deceptive power against me. As I read through your website, I have gotten a really good understanding of what sins are. And therefore I realize what sins I have been doing. I confessed these to the Lord and I've been making an act to change. So here I present to you a spiritual battle against temptation. I ask you: How do I combat temptation and sin in general?

Another thing that I want to ask about is combat against the evil one. As I explored your website, I have seen some, disturbed people who have set about to do the works of the evil one. Now since I was born and even now, I have had a sincere disgust and discomfort whenever it comes to evil things. I have always been disturbed by the evil one, that's why I'm not saying his wicked name. Now many intrusively unwanted thoughts shower upon me once in a while, which makes me feel very very uncomfortable. How do I set about conquering those unwanted thoughts and have my mind clear of the evil one's wickedness?

Answer:

It is good to hear from young people who sincerely want to follow after God. Since I don't know your background, my first recommendation is to dedicate yourself completely to Christ. For this, see:

It helps in battling a temptation to understand why you find certain things to be tempting. See The Nature of Sin, Temptation, and Lust.

A common problem is that we tend to focus on getting rid of sin, but that is only half of the problem. If sin is not replaced with something better, then we will lapse right back into it. "Now when the unclean spirit goes out of a man, it passes through waterless places seeking rest, and does not find it. Then it says, 'I will return to my house from which I came'; and when it comes, it finds it unoccupied, swept, and put in order. Then it goes and takes along with it seven other spirits more wicked than itself, and they go in and live there; and the last state of that man becomes worse than the first. That is the way it will also be with this evil generation" (Matthew 12:43-45). Thus, when unwanted thoughts intrude, find better things to do that require your focus. "Submit therefore to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded" (James 4:7-8). Notice the contrasting actions. It takes both resisting the Devil and submitting to God in order to win.

Finally, don't give up improving yourself. "Be of sober spirit, be on the alert. Your adversary, the devil, prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. But resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same experiences of suffering are being accomplished by your brethren who are in the world" (I Peter 5:8-9).

I didn't get into specifics since I don't know what kind of temptations and thoughts you are struggling against, but these lay out the general ground rules for battling sin. If you want to discuss more specific problems, you are welcome to write again.

Response:

Hello! Thank you for your great response!

Thank you for your compassion, wisdom, and biblical guidance

Jeffrey Hamilton — Thu, 02 May 2019 02:02:00 +0000

Question:

I thank you for your compassion, wisdom, and biblical guidance in regards to a person suffering from intrusive thoughts they feared were vows.

Answer:

You're welcome.

Are you required to keep promises that you think about?

Jeffrey Hamilton — Sat, 05 Nov 2016 20:12:00 +0000

Question:

Hi,

I'm wondering if promises that randomly pop up in your head are considered valid. Are you required to keep the promises, even though they're just thoughts? I have OCD and get these thoughts constantly. They cause me a deal of anxiety. Also, in order to treat OCD, am I allowed to purposefully think or say a promise and avoid keeping it? This is in order to lower the anxiety associated with the pop-up thoughts. Will God see this as sinning, regardless of the reason as to why I'm doing it?

Answer:

"Or if a person swears, speaking thoughtlessly with his lips to do evil or to do good, whatever it is that a man may pronounce by an oath, and he is unaware of it - when he realizes it, then he shall be guilty in any of these matters. And it shall be, when he is guilty in any of these matters, that he shall confess that he has sinned in that thing" (Leviticus 5:4-5).

A common mistake is to assume that any promise must be done. But what if a person promises to commit a sin? Such a promise cannot be kept because you cannot do evil in order to do good. "And why not say, "Let us do evil that good may come"? --as we are slanderously reported and as some affirm that we say. Their condemnation is just" (Romans 3:8).

Careless or thoughtless oaths are sinful. Promises are important, so they must be well thought out. In the Old Law, a thoughtless promise was treated as a sin, but you do not see a requirement that they must be kept.

But I want you to notice something else: promises are given to someone else, they are spoken. A random thought is not a promise. To think about making a promise is not the same as making a promise. To comment on a thought by saying it out loud is not the same as an actual promise.

I have OCD and suffer from blasphemous thoughts. Should I stop confessing these thoughts?

Jeffrey Hamilton — Tue, 10 Jul 2012 02:56:00 +0000

Question:

I am a Christian who suffers from OCD. I just read your website on OCD and feel extremely comforted by your knowledge of the illness. I have blasphemous thoughts, and I keep confessing this as sin over and over and over again. Maybe all that confessing is my OCD. Can I stop confessing, or do I need to confess blasphemous thoughts at least periodically? I have been on the computer all night reading your website, and I thank you very much for all the information. Maybe I will get better now; I really do suffer.

Answer:

As I mentioned in I have OCD-Religion and obsess over bad thoughts. Is there anything you can do to help me? the problem is really about distinguishing a "pop-up" thought and those that you purposely think about. You cannot truly count these pop-up thoughts as being your own -- you reject them, you disagree with them, and you don't desire them. Understanding that these are not your thoughts, but the result of a short-circuit in your mind. They would be wrong if you were purposely thinking about them and accepting them. Since this is not the case, you are not sinning. Going to God in prayer about something you have not done is a useless, compulsive act. Leave your prayers to real things -- things you have actually done wrong.

I’m scared of the thoughts in my head

Jeffrey Hamilton — Tue, 01 Dec 2009 03:46:00 +0000

Question:

After days of researching everywhere to know if I am truly safe because I thought I had committed the unforgivable sin, which is the sin of having blasphemed against the Holy Spirit, I found out that I did not because to truly commit that sin, you must have your heart hardened so much that you do not care for redemption.

However, I still get weird thoughts and nasty thoughts about the Lord Almighty, but I do not mean any of them. I feel so bad, but I know that that was not my fault and I know that I could be forgiven.

Recently I got a weird thought and it was kind of like a good thought for the devil. I did not mean it and I hated it after I had that thought, but after I had that thought my mind went all negative and I was so scared. Then I got weird signs: I got a pamphlet about Satanists from my neighbors, my friend got a phone and the digits are with the triple 6's, and much more.

I feel so scared and I have been thinking so negatively, but I know that I should not. I even asked my good Christian friend if I am all right. He said I am because even Satanists can be forgiven. But I don't know. I am so scared and I am being so stressed by this. I am just a 14-year-old boy and this is a very rough time for me

Help would be very appreciated.

Answer:

"But with me it is a very small thing that I should be judged by you or by a human court. In fact, I do not even judge myself. For I know nothing against myself, yet I am not justified by this; but He who judges me is the Lord" (I Corinthians 4:3-4).

Like a number of people, you are getting caught in a trap. Ideas that you don't accept are popping up in your head, but because they are in your head you assume that they must be your own idea. Because you don't like those ideas, you sit in judgment on yourself and condemn yourself for having those ideas pop up in your mind. Things then spiral out of control. The more you try to suppress the thoughts, the more they keep coming up, so you decide you must be a really bad person.

So let's back up a bit and see what is happening. Your brain doesn't handle one thing at a time. There are thousands of signals flying around at the same which allows you to read a book, while listening to music, while scratching the dog, while telling your mom you'll get to it in a moment while wondering what smells so good, etc. We're not conscious of all the underlying messages flying around most of the time. A few people "overhear" some of the internal thoughts. Some have problems with "mislabeling" in their brains: A memory is being fetched, but for some reason, the brain labels it as something that is coming from the ears and the person is convinced they are hearing voices when no one is there. A lot of people experience mislabeling in regards to time. Something happens but their brain labels it as a memory instead of a current event and the person experiences a feeling of deja vu -- feeling like you been there before.

For most people passing thoughts are just that -- passing through and not given credence. But some people dwell on these thoughts. It seems to be a particular problem during adolescence because during this time your brain is rewiring itself for adulthood. Odd thoughts and obsessive ideas are prevalent among teenagers as a result.

When we are focused on something we tend to notice "related" things. There is the old myth that bad news comes in threes. It really doesn't. Bad things and good things happen all the time, but when a bad thing grabs our attention, we tend to focus on each succeeding bad event until the count of three is reached. You are doing something similar. You had a passing bad thought about Satan and then became "sensitive" to every allusion to Satan thereafter, even though those types of things are around all the time. Those aren't signs; they are a measure of your awareness of events you normally don't notice.

It seems backward, but the way to handle bad pop up thoughts is to accept that they happen and that you know they aren't good thoughts. You are forgetting that because you know they aren't good that this judgment shows your character -- not the passing thought. Everyone gets tempted by sin (James 1:13-16). Being tempted is not a sin. It becomes a sin when we accept the idea, like the idea of doing it, and are looking for an opportunity to do it. At this point, it is lust and it is a problem.

But to be tempted, Satan has to get us to think about the sin for at least a moment. Some people face these and think: "That's ridiculous! I'm not going to do that." And then they are able to dismiss the thought. Other people think about it and decide they like the idea and so eventually sin. But there are some people who do neither. They reject the idea, but then condemn themselves for the idea being there. Thus, they fall into a hidden trap.

Like Paul, you need to stop judging yourself. Let God do the judging. Your job is to judge whether something is in accordance with God's Will or not by measuring it against what you know God has taught in the Bible. When you find something is wrong, reject it for being wrong, but don't reject yourself. God judges you, not you -- you are too biased to make an accurate judgment. In such matters, you must not rely on your feelings. Your personal emotions are not an accurate reflection of reality. Your emotions are too easily manipulated. Judge matters facing you, as accurately as you can, based on facts.

There are going to be times when you will realize that certain things you have done or things you have accepted in your mind are sinful. You will know they are wrong because it doesn't match up with what God said you should do. When you come up short, which we all do on occasion, you change your behavior, take the problem to God, and ask for His forgiveness. "If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. If we say that we have not sinned, we make Him a liar, and His word is not in us" (I John 1:8-10). But stop telling God what He should do with you. Focus on doing your best for God.

Question:

I want to thank you so much for this reply. I was thinking about whether you would actually receive the mail and I am very happy to find out that you did. I am very thankful for you taking the time to think about my hardships right now.

I am sorry, but I want to ask you some more questions and elaborate more on this subject. You wrote that it is not my fault that I have these thoughts in my head. But I forgot to mention that when I had that "good" thought about the devil, I didn't feel remorse right at that second and I didn't repent at that moment. However, I get these thoughts nowadays that say that I will be condemned to hell forever because of that thought I had.

Now, I forgot if I ever mentioned it, but my problem is that I don't know if I actually meant it or not, and now I am suffering because of that. I keep thinking that I meant to think this thought.

What I want to know is if God forgives all sins, even Satanists and people who have sold their soul to the devil, if they ever come back to God and repent.

I keep putting myself in the category of a Satanist or something. I asked two friends, but I did not get clarification from them because I wasn't very open to them.

I want to know if God forgives every single sin if we repent and I want to know if I became a Satanist because I don't remember hating the "good" thought about the devil that I had.

I go to church every single Sunday, I pray every day, I always try my best to become a good Christian and I do not want to lose this salvation.

Thank you again for this guidance.

Oh, I forgot to mention that every time a bad thing occurs to me I keep thinking that it's over and that I lost my salvation. I constantly worry. However, when I have good things occur I feel safe for that moment and then it goes away.

Answer:

"If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness" (I John 1:9).

May I ask, what part of "all" do you not understand?

God doesn't look at a person's past. He looks at who a person is, right now, at this moment. It doesn't matter if you reject a bad thought in one second, one day, or a year later. What matters is your view of the concept right now. "But if a wicked man turns from all his sins which he has committed, keeps all My statutes, and does what is lawful and right, he shall surely live; he shall not die. None of the transgressions which he has committed shall be remembered against him; because of the righteousness which he has done, he shall live. 'Do I have any pleasure at all that the wicked should die?' says the Lord GOD, 'and not that he should turn from his ways and live?'" (Ezekiel 18:21-23).

You're going to make mistakes. You are going to commit sins. That simply is a fact of life living in this wicked world. "If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us" (I John 1:8). God doesn't want you or anyone else to sin, but what is more critical in God's view is your response to sin. Righteous people will sin once in a while, but they reject the idea; they don't like sin, and they will make effort to get it out of their life so they can continue their journey toward heaven. Sin is not a part of the nature of a righteous person. Sinful people will sin, but they don't care. They won't make any effort to change. Sin is a part of the nature of a sinful person.

A passing thought did not make you a Satanist -- not even close. You've rejected the idea and that is all that matters. Now get off your behind, stop feeling sorry for yourself, and get busy serving God with the joy He deserves.

Response:

Thank you so much! You have helped me get this stress out of my back. I did not want to bring up this question to my church teachers or my Christian club teachers. You are like my other anonymous church teacher. Thank you. I will try my best to please the Lord. God bless you.

I have OCD-Religion and obsess over bad thoughts. Is there anything you can do to help me?

Jeffrey Hamilton — Sat, 21 Nov 2009 01:59:11 +0000

Question:

I have a serious and tormenting question. I am a member of the church of Christ and have been for a while. Four years ago I was diagnosed with OCD-religion. This is a mental illness which produces unwanted and intrusive bad thoughts. I have been in pure misery and have been paralyzed by fear over this illness. My thoughts usually center around blame as well as other things. I have been to many doctors, psychiatrists, and church counselors who have chalked it up to anxiety and have prescribed me with medication, but, unfortunately, I still have these tormenting and condemning thoughts.

I am in constant prayer all through the day asking for forgiveness and to be cured of this, but as of today, I'm still struggling. Despite these bad thoughts, I continue to go to church worship, study the Bible, and take communion. I even got baptized two times to hopefully comfort my fears but to no avail.

My church counselor and family assures me that it's my illness, not me, that makes me feel like I'm having the bad thoughts on my own. Sometimes I get so overwhelmed that I think it's me and I must be a really bad person on the inside. I have to recite scriptures in my head daily to help ease the pain and fear. I love God so much. Why, oh why, is this happening to me? I am so afraid I'll commit the unpardonable sin and be sentenced to eternity in hell. I'm always in fear of this. I have no peace in my head. It's pure misery. While some days are good to where I will not have as many pop-ups and I feel better, they eventually pop-up again. Actually there are certain words that produce bad thoughts such as Satan, etc. My head is like a tape recorder and I can't turn it off. Sometimes I can't even read the Bible because my head gets verses tangled up to make a bad thought.

I know this illness is rare and I don't have much support. I have written to you before and you have helped me. I was hoping that you can help me with this issue. Any suggestions? Any comforting words? Anything? Can you reassure me that I will not commit the unpardonable sin in my head? I love God so much and only want to be a good Christian. I find myself feeling jealous and envious of people who seem to have the perfect Christian life and I am suffering every day with continued fear. I recently had a cancer scare and that made my fears even more paralyzing. Please respond if you can help me in any way. I am suffering so much I need peace in my head so bad. Can you help me?

Thanks so much for your time and patience. Hope to hear from you soon.

Answer:

"Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus" (Philippians 4:6-7).

Your description definitely sounds like a classic case of scrupulosity, which is the older term for being obsessive-compulsive in matters of religion.

Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder in General

Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) afflicts about 2.5% of the population over a lifetime.¹ Most of those afflicted with the problem have an irrational fear generated by intrusive thoughts, which they attempt to manage by some compulsive or ritual behavior. Even those suffering from OCD understand that their fear isn't reasonable, but they have difficulty managing it. But notice that there are two halves to the problem: a fear and a response. The responsive behavior might or might not be related to the fear. It is more a way that the person finds "comfort" so as to manage the anxiety. Treatment of OCD focuses on both halves.

First, the person has to realize that their anxiety is not really a part of them. They have a short circuit in their brain's wiring that makes odd thoughts pop up in their minds. Actually, it is believed that all people have odd thoughts pop up, but for the OCD person, those thoughts are given great significance. They begin judging themselves for having those thoughts, deciding they must be bad for having them. It is important to understand that most OCD sufferers do not like or enjoy the intruding thoughts. They fear that because those thoughts come, it indicates that it might be true about them. People without OCD have odd thoughts pop up and quickly dismiss them as being irrelevant to who they are. OCD people can't let go of their thoughts.

The odd thing about how the human brain works is that if something is accepted, we tend to forget about it quickly. An example of this is to try and meditate on the image of say a moose for five minutes or more. Very quickly, your mind wanders off to other topics. It becomes a struggle to keep the image in your mind. But if we try to force ourselves to forget something, that image keeps worming its way back into our conscience. Again, if I ask you to focus on not thinking about a moose, it will keep popping up in your mind.

Therefore, the first difficult task is to embrace the thought. Things that trigger the thought are purposely invoked so that the person's anxiety about the thought can be dealt with. Repeated exposure deadens the feelings that accompany the thought.³

The second task is related, and that is to break the compulsive response to anxiety. A person faces his fear and then doesn't do what he typically does to "control" his anxiety.

It should be noted that OCD is managed. It typically doesn't go away. Instead, the person learns how to properly view their intrusive thoughts, not get anxious over them, and how to avoid lapsing into compulsive behavior. Flare-ups often reoccur at odd times, and often, the OCD manifests itself differently.

Religious Obsessive-Compulsive Disorders

When OCD and religion intermix, the results are more difficult to deal with. Intrusive thoughts are known to be bad or sinful, so a person becomes highly judgmental about the type of person he must be for having such thoughts. Dr. Frank Penzel notes:

Religious obsessions can take on any of the following forms:

That the person has sinned or broken a religious law, or displeased their god in some way, either in the past or present, and may therefore go to hell or receive some other punishment

That prayers have been omitted or recited incorrectly

Repetitive blasphemous thoughts

Thoughts about impulsively saying blasphemous words or committing blasphemous acts while attending religious services

That the person has lost touch with God or their beliefs in some way

Thoughts of being "unworthy" of salvation in some way

Intrusive sexual thoughts about God, saints, religious figures, etc.

That the person, through negligence, has broken religious laws concerning speech, dress, food preparation, modesty, etc.

Intrusive "bad" thoughts or images that occur during prayer, meditation, or other observances that "contaminate" and ruin or cancel out the value of these activities

Believing that one's religious practice must be 100% perfect, or else it is worthless or worse

Thoughts of being possessed⁴

Often, these thoughts are countered by religious activities. Dr. Frank Penzel lists the following:

Some typical compulsions that are used in response to religious obsessions might include:

Saying prayers, or carrying out religious acts repetitively until they are done 'perfectly (a process that can last for hours)

Saying prayers or crossing oneself a special "magical" number of times

Constantly asking for God's forgiveness, or telling God that you didn't mean what you said or did

Rereading passages from holy books over and over to make sure nothing was misunderstood or missed

Repeatedly asking religious leaders or authorities the same questions on religious practice to be sure of understanding the answer, or to get reassurance about specific acts or words being sinful

Double-checking different religious acts or observances to be sure they were done correctly

Repeatedly reviewing past thoughts or actions to determine if they were sinful or not

Protecting religious symbols, ornaments, books, or pictures from "contamination"

Constantly reviewing one's own words or phrases for double meanings that might have been irreligious or blasphemous

Trying to imagine special "good" religious images or thoughts to cancel out "bad" and irreligious images or thoughts

When any activity was performed with a blasphemous thought in mind, having to redo it with a "good" thought

Excessive confessing of religious misdeeds or sinful behaviors to obtain forgiveness or reassurance

Having to carry out religious dietary, dress, or appearance codes perfectly

This list by no means exhausts the possibilities. They are almost endless. ⁴

However, as Paul noted, such man-made solutions don't work. "Therefore, if you died with Christ from the basic principles of the world, why, as though living in the world, do you subject yourselves to regulations-- "Do not touch, do not taste, do not handle," which all concern things which perish with the using -- according to the commandments and doctrines of men? These things indeed have an appearance of wisdom in self-imposed religion, false humility, and neglect of the body, but are of no value against the indulgence of the flesh" (Colossians 2:20-23).

Treatment of religious OCD is a bit more difficult because it borders on the truth yet is twisted.

Recall that OCD sufferers put too much emphasis on intrusive thoughts. This can manifest itself in a variety of ways, according to Laurie Krauth.⁵

A person might convince himself that having a bad thought is just as bad as actually doing something sinful. Actually, this is a warping of Jesus' statement, "But I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart" (Matthew 5:28). Jesus didn't say if you had a passing thought about a woman (a temptation) that it was the same as committing adultery. He said that if a person looks to lust for a woman, he has committed adultery in his heart. In other words, when a person contemplates the idea, accepts it as something they want to do, and only lacks the opportunity to do it, it is little different from actually doing the sin. That is a key difference from most OCD people and other people as well. When we are faced with a thought about sin, our gut reaction is to reject the thought -- that isn't lust!

A variation on this is that a person might convince himself that having a bad thought will lead to the actual action. They discount the fact that they don't like the thought. They don't realize that their hatred of the sin will produce the opposite effect -- they will be less likely to commit such a sin. "I will set nothing wicked before my eyes; I hate the work of those who fall away; it shall not cling to me. A perverse heart shall depart from me; I will not know wickedness" (Psalm 103:3-4).

The result leads to irrational thinking (again from Laurie Krauth):

• Control of thoughts: When people try to control their thoughts, they usually find the thoughts become harder to prevent. (Try that old experiment: first attempt to think about a brown bear for five minutes, noticing how often your mind drifts. Then try not to think of it for five minutes. You discover that a thought becomes more tenacious when you try to stifle it.) Scrupulosity sufferers are distraught that inappropriate thoughts enter their mind. Instead of dismissing them with a shrug as people without OCD do, they become horrified that they had the thoughts at all and try to stifle them, which has the opposite effect.

• Intolerance of uncertainty: Sufferers need to know absolutely that they are morally or religiously in the right because they believe that the consequences, such as eternal damnation, will be severe if they are wrong. For example, when John tried to reassure himself that he was good, it led to over-analysis of his past thoughts and deeds, paralysis, and senseless rituals and avoidance.

• Emotional reasoning: People with OCD think that if they feel something, it must be true, regardless of the evidence. So even though John knew he was committed to keeping his children safe, if his senseless harm obsessions worried him, he took that worry as evidence that they truly were in danger from him.

• All-or-nothing thinking: Scrupulosity sufferers believe that if they don’t practice their faith perfectly, they have failed. When John had a bad thought in church, it virtually wiped out the good in his otherwise constant devotion.⁵

The Solution

The solution is found in the passage I quoted at the beginning from Philippians 4:6-7.

First, you need to face your fears. Purposely expose yourself to the thoughts that trigger your anxiety. One method is to write out a script of your obsessive thought and what you fear will result. Record it and play it back repeatedly. This will get you use to the idea and allow you to actually consider it without your emotions getting in the way. After a while, you will get to the point that you realize it isn't a rational fear.

Then take it to God in prayer. Let God worry about it.

Next, be thankful! It is easy to get so focused on bad things that we forget all the blessings God has given us. If we really appreciate all of God's bounteous gifts, then you will realize that fears of God's rejection are really a lack of appreciation of God's love and faith in His promises. So start trying to enumerate God's blessings in your life and put life back into proper perspective.

The result will be peace, which is what we all need.

Resources:

Antony, M. M.; F. Downie & R. P. Swinson. "Diagnostic issues and epidemiology in obsessive-compulsive disorder." in Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder: Theory, Research, and Treatment, eds. M. M. Antony; S. Rachman; M. A. Richter & R. P. Swinson. New York: The Guilford Press, 1998, pp. 3-32.
Wikipedia: Obsessive-Compulsive Disorders
Morelli, Frank; Obsessions Are Not the Real Problem, Change Your Thinking
Penzel, Fred; Let Him Who Is Without Sin: OCD and Religion
Krauth, Laurie; Scrupulosity: Blackmailed by OCD in the Name of God

Question:

While I appreciate all the information you provided, I am still very worried that I have committed the unforgivable sin in my head. Can you reassure me I haven't done that? I'm very terrified and need some relief! Some say it's rejecting God's word. Some say it can't be done in this day and time. Please define blasphemy of the Holy Spirit. You seem to be very informed about this subject. Have you dealt with this problem with other people? Please respond. I need reassurance I'm OK. There's no way I can blaspheme when I love and believe in Jesus, right? Hope to hear from you soon.

Answer:

"Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen" (Hebrews 11:1).

It appears that not much of what I wrote registered with you. You are doing the very thing I warned you about. The problem is that I can't reassure you because I can't give you faith. I can explain it until I'm exhausted, and you will still seek reassurance because of your lack of control over your OCD.

There are plenty of answers to questions regarding "the unforgivable sin" and "blasphemy of the Holy Spirit." I try to avoid repeating topics. See:

Question:

I just wanted to say I'm sorry for bothering you so much. I'm living in such an awful state of mind. I am, however, so amazed at how you are so aware of scrupulosity. Many people have never heard of it. I'm so glad I found you and that you understand. Even my church counselor has never heard of it and still denies the fact that I have OCD. He thinks I just have anxiety. He thinks of OCD as counting, skipping, etc. I have read and reread the information you sent over and over. My psychiatrist agrees with you that I must accept the thoughts like a passing cloud, no matter how awful they are. She suggested that I do not pray afterward, but I feel I must.

I do have faith in God and I know He knows my heart. Also, this illness makes me feel like I'm a bad person, not the OCD. That's why I feel like I need the reassurance from others. I love God very much and believe in Him, trust Him, and have faith in Him, but it all just gets so overwhelming at times. I have not rejected God. I still go to church regularly worship and pray.

I think it's only natural that a person feels scared with these awful thoughts due to OCD. I still have trouble letting go of prayer after intrusive thoughts. And, yes, that does weaken my faith at times, but I know deep down inside that God knows this condition and will not punish me for something I can't control.

You mentioned faith before. Are you saying my sometimes lack of faith during my thoughts is blasphemy? How can I, when I love, cherish, and believe with all my heart, and I will never turn away from God? I will continue to stay strong despite my thoughts.

People without this illness has no idea of the fear and torment that comes along with this illness. So as long as I keep the faith (believing in God's promise) and continue to walk in the light of Christ there is no way I can blaspheme, right? I know I sound like I'm doubting again and it makes me feel awful, but, you're right, I just need the reassurance of my salvation.

I hope you will respond. Thanks for being so understanding and not judgemental. I appreciate all the help you can give me. Please pray for me daily.

Answer:

One of the difficult parts of dealing with religious OCD is that some of the things you need to do sound on the surface to be the opposite of what you should be doing. When your psychiatrist tells you not to pray in response to an OCD compulsion, it is not because she doesn't want you to pray. The problem that OCD people don't realize is that it isn't a real prayer.

I know, it sounds shocking, but you know that the anxiety isn't due to a real problem. Thus you pray out of compulsion to pray and not from a real need. Think of it in terms of the OCD person who because of anxiety over germs feels the need to wash his hands. He'll wash so many times his hands are raw. Worse, there was no real need to wash, so the scrubbing was a worthless effort. You're doing the same thing with prayer.

Pray because you have real things to pray about, but don't pray because you are feeling a compulsive urge to pray as a result of being anxious. You need to develop control over your impulses and not give in to them just because they sound righteous on the surface.

The reason I'm challenging your faith is that you are not accepting what God said in the Bible. Instead, you are seeking out what other people tell you. Therefore, without realizing it you are putting more trust in men than in God. You know from a factual basis that you are doing what God wants you to do, yet you are not willing to let that be enough. That is what you must master. That is a part of building your faith to a higher level than it is currently.

Notice, too, that I haven't said you can't control your OCD. You can. Others have done so and you can too. It takes a lot of effort, but time is better spent in that effort than in anxiety.

Nor will I tell someone that they can't commit a particular sin. Sin is always crouching at the door and if we fool ourselves into thinking that we can't fall for a particular trap, then we won't be on guard against it. "Therefore let him who thinks he stands take heed lest he fall" (I Corinthians 10:12). At this moment, you don't understand what blasphemy truly is. As a result, you see it in every little thought. I gave you material to read to learn what it is and I rather you learn for yourself. But one important point is that someone who blasphemes God doesn't care what God or anyone else thinks about what he has done. Currently, you do care. That is why I know your fears are empty ones coming from your OCD.

The key to managing your OCD is learning to distinguish real problems and concerns from the empty ones that come from OCD. It takes practice -- lots of practice. Yes, I do understand the torment you go through. I have a good friend who has scrupulosity. He has flare-ups once in a while, but for the most part, he is able to keep it under control. I think you can do it too.

Why do I swear in my mind in the church and when I get up in the morning?

Jeffrey Hamilton — Tue, 20 Oct 2009 02:12:00 +0000

Question:

Why is it I swear in my mind at God when in church and even when I wake up in the morning. I am a believing Christian, but this has got me very worried. I ask God and the Holy Spirit to remove these evil thoughts. Why do they keep popping up? I love Jesus and have accepted him in my life, but what is this interference? I read about Hymenaeus and I do not want to be delivered into Satan's power.

Answer:

I'm not in a position to be able to answer your question. There are neurological disorders that include compulsive cursing. In the medical literature, it is called "coprolalia." Like many other disorders it can have a range of displays from silent thoughts to involuntary outbursts. Whether you have this problem is something only a doctor could determine and even then they would not be certain.

The only thing I can offer is what Peter advised, "Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour. Resist him, steadfast in the faith, knowing that the same sufferings are experienced by your brotherhood in the world" (I Peter 5:8-9). Don't accept matters as they stand. Figure out ways to not curse. Study yourself to figure out what triggers the events. It might be something as simple as popping up when nothing major is occupying your thoughts. When you find a pattern, then find an alternative to break the pattern.